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Old 09-09-2005, 06:10 AM   #11 (permalink)
Dont Get Raped In Cancun
 
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Rap Off!!!!!!
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go on out
get some more
go on out
to the bar
the market or the liquor store

friends dont let friends get lost in chinatown
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Old 09-09-2005, 07:12 AM   #12 (permalink)
Like Friend like Lover!
 
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Ya know what bitch? Im ova you!

Haha
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It breaks my heart.
We’ve applied mascara to the radio,
But that’s just a quick fix and we need a little more.
Does it matter to you at all?
Are you listening?
Or have you tuned out?
Get by.
Get gone.
Get high.
Get wronged.
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Old 09-09-2005, 07:40 AM   #13 (permalink)
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Oh. Oh, Renee!

Tell everyone about jessica and the "weeeeeeeeeeeed"!

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It breaks my heart.
We’ve applied mascara to the radio,
But that’s just a quick fix and we need a little more.
Does it matter to you at all?
Are you listening?
Or have you tuned out?
Get by.
Get gone.
Get high.
Get wronged.
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Old 09-10-2005, 05:37 PM   #14 (permalink)
accidental genius
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Spike*Spiegel
alright then, YOU write something better, if you think you know so much.
Are you actually backing this guy up?
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Old 09-14-2005, 05:10 PM   #15 (permalink)
killedmyraindog
 
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it takes alot of balls to post something here, you cna't just go around smashing peopls fragile ego about their own work. Its always been said that the best writers have the thinnest skin.
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Old 09-15-2005, 06:09 PM   #16 (permalink)
Music Addict
 
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in this instance however, it's like teaching a mule to speak. dependant on the age of whoever this was, they need to A) mature (much of my early writing was forced rhymes and such) or B) choose a different style. It is hard to write a good rap song (not gangsta rap, but a real rap. like Mr. Lif or Aesop Rock).

Bezerk, ease up on the rhyming and the overly brutal hatred towards this whore. Unless you want to join Korn most of your "rhymes" will never work. at all. try and be more indistinct or have some sort of metaphor. Straight forward works sometimes but not now.
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Old 09-28-2005, 11:45 AM   #17 (permalink)
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it rhymes well
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Old 09-28-2005, 03:52 PM   #18 (permalink)
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this is a ****ing diddy pop song, not rap.
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Old 09-28-2005, 10:53 PM   #19 (permalink)
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Quote:
Hell I am like Juggernaut from the X-Men.
You are like someone at the age of 10!
hahahahahahahahahaha

and my personal favorite, right before he insulted said girl by calling her a ten year old:

Quote:
If I knew you were gonna use me I would have spent my money on yugioh.
Instead I ended up wasting it on a dirty ho.
now, correct me if i'm wrong, but isnt yugioh a sort of animated cartoon similar to pokemon?

seriously kid, it's great if writing relieves stress or helps you get things off your chest, but if you want to write quality lyrics, try for a more sophisticated set of metaphors instead of just writing down the first set of words that come to your head.
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Old 10-06-2005, 07:33 PM   #20 (permalink)
Make it so
 
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I absolutely hate rap. But this isn't rap, this is just crap! <----rhyming YO!
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