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02-27-2012, 07:10 PM | #1 (permalink) |
Groupie
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Vancouver Island B.C. Canada
Posts: 5
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The road was much less taken...
The road was much less taken, the path was pretty rugged
Defining who I was by learning everything I wasn't... Lifting like the clouds when soaking everything beneath them Drifting through this town and hoping one day I can free them Valley of the lost!........................ Souls in need of saving! .....Tasteful to delight but not the recipe I'm craving I'm here to light the lantern, I'm here to brighten spirits I'm here to share my story through my book of life and lyrics Maybe we can do this.... Maybe we can prosper... Maybe we should give a **** instead of can't be bothered Tell me why do people lie and hate to hear the truth We try to act oblivious and hide in fear of proof!! It's time to stick together, we all affect each other I'll never leave a good man down, I'll never leave my brother Reaching out a noble hand cuz no ones left behind Actions signifying traits of how we're best defined Loud like any impact, bound by braking borders Sick of living someone's dream and always taking orders Something to believe in and someone to believe Is what I'm dedicated too and one day will achieve So put a glimpse of faith in me and let me show you how I dream to make a difference and one day make you proud The road was much less taken but someone's gotta do it The spark that feeds the fire is the one that starts the movement...... Chris-Topher tha An-a-dote |
02-27-2012, 07:12 PM | #2 (permalink) |
Groupie
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Vancouver Island B.C. Canada
Posts: 5
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If I could
If I could say one simple thing to make you all believe
I'm changing with the seasons like a maple's autumn leaves If I could spend another second feeling like I did... Then I would move in all my chips to plead the highest bid If I could understand you better, I could soothe your scars But nothing stops the impact like a highways moving cars If I could beat the odds before then they'll be beat again Cuz only beating down yourself will beat you in the end... If I could be there anytime... I'll always be my friend! So just remember things we shared until we meet again... If I could see you smile beside me here the morning after... In tune with life like horseback riders share the horses canter If I could sing a melody and you could hum the tune... Then we could share this evenings light and grace the humble moon If I could count the ways you all have made me feel so blessed It'd probably take me days and then I'd need a day of rest If I could run the fastest then I'd probably never run... For if you runaway forever, pleasures never come.... If I could be somebody else I'd probably still be me At least I know myself a bit and live at will & free.... If I could stop the storm from coming I don't think I'd do it For life is often quite the storm but we can make it through it We do the best we can by reading signs and knowing factors And even through the struggling storm a rainbows glowing after... Chris-Topher tha An-a-dote |
02-27-2012, 07:12 PM | #3 (permalink) |
The Sexual Intellectual
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Somewhere cooler than you
Posts: 18,605
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Keep all your stuff to one thread please.
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Urb's RYM Stuff Most people sell their soul to the devil, but the devil sells his soul to Nick Cave. |
02-27-2012, 07:13 PM | #4 (permalink) |
Groupie
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Vancouver Island B.C. Canada
Posts: 5
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Smile for the Camera...
Smile for the camera, some might say cheese
We prosper through moments of righteous with ease Searching for more, searching far places, searching for pieces to fill in the spaces Life is the puzzle and I want the box The picture, the vision that's sly like a fox The fox remains gentle with delicate steps Majestic when most see no elegance left... Smile for the camera, everyone's watching Some get things done while everyone's talking Moments remembered by people who shared No camera, no journal, just being right there A night to remember, wake up in abyss? One day you'll look back & ask, what did I miss? All make mistakes but if we're not learning It's tough to go back across bridges while burning Tomorrow will challenge us more than we know... We've been there before like a story once told 1 for the glory.... 2 to be bold... Cocked, remain ready... when empty, reload! We know where we stand, and if we believe Then we can stop falling like fresh autumn leaves To captivate people while planning there plots... The camera is watching but can't see our thoughts! Chris-Topher the An-a-dote... |
03-05-2012, 12:45 PM | #5 (permalink) | |
Facilitator
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Where people kill 30 million pigs per year
Posts: 2,014
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Chris, your poems seem very thoughtful and optimistic to me. I liked these lines best:
"Tell me why do people lie and hate to hear the truth We try to act oblivious and hide in fear of proof!" "Cuz only beating down yourself will beat you in the end..." and "It's time to stick together, we all affect each other I'll never leave a good man down, I'll never leave my brother." ^ Very sweet. These lines, "So put a glimpse of faith in me and let me show you how I dream to make a difference and one day make you proud," remind me how helpful it is when someone takes a little of her or his time to pay attention to someone else and be supportive. You use many incongruent images in your poems, which might be your hip hop sensibilities showing up in your poetry. For example, in "Smile for the Camera" you mention a fox, an abyss, possibly a gun (cock and reload), burning bridges, and autumn leaves. I prefer poems/lyrics that have one central image around which all the descriptions revolve, rather than poems that connect aspects of many different subjects, but that's just a personal preference. The lines I found myself contemplating the most, which are the ones I felt were most poetic, are these: "Life is the puzzle and I want the box The picture, the vision that's sly like a fox The fox remains gentle with delicate steps Majestic when most see no elegance left." I've heard people say before that life is a puzzle, so that wasn't new, but what I really liked was how you said you want the box. I imagined this as saying that you don't just want to understand how all the components of life fit together, but you want to have and see the box in which life came, where the box gets one a little closer to answering the question of why life or anything exists at all. The box in which a puzzle comes usually tells the maker, the date, the instructions, and so if life *were* a puzzle, it *would* be nice to have the box. I also liked the image of the fox taking delicate, majestic steps. I don't fully understand how the fox imagery relates to the sly picture (of life) that you want to put together. Even though I didn't understand it, though, I liked this sudden, unexpected description of a fox.
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