my lyrics- battles

dahotshotda · 02-20-2012, 04:11 PM

here it comes..... can't get away from it

We pick up our shield and pick up our sword
There's no where to run we all hale our lord
Blood,bones,wounds we all have to see
But theres no running away its our destiny

Pride and glory we all shall be praised
We all know that this is how legends are made
For the king we shall die with no regrets
Leaving a legacy for our
children to follow our footsteps
If god has mercy and lets us live another day
It is certainly because we all have prayed
The only thing we trust in war is our strengh and power
But we know that we all can be dead within the hour

We pick up our shield and pick up our sword
There's no where to run we all hale our lord
Blood,bones,wounds we all will see
But theres no running away its our destiny

Before charging we all shout our kings name
He stands behind us and thinks its all a game
We are the soldiers that are dying
But he has no shame
Counting the victories and getting all the fame
United and together we fought all the wars
Yelling and screaming banging on the doors
Calling the men to come out and fight
Help them unite with god and see the white light

We picked up our shields and picked up our swords
There's no where to run we all hailed our lord
We won and got our glorious victory
Battle of troy it was called, we made history

dahotshotda · 02-23-2012, 03:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Orrin

Some points:
- I found it a little difficult to pick a metre from the lyrics and was stumbling over words as I read them in time.

what u mean ??

- It's spelled "hail" (i know but its in the pass is it still hail ? or

What kind of music do you picture this being sung to?

well i think i want music like Where dragons rule by dragon force

but im willing to listen to any other offers
i cant find someone that can put music to it i looked all over the net ...

dahotshotda · 03-04-2012, 04:39 AM

"But theres no running away its our destiny" to be

"But we won't run away from our destiny"[/QUOTE]

no i dont play on an instrument

and youre right there are some parts that you do have to rush with the words.... but i cant put music to it .... im trying to find some1 that can .... \=

i also posted new lyrics for another song

feel free to give me notes too

TheNiceGuy · 03-06-2012, 05:22 AM

I was reading this as quite a good social comment on religious wars until the last verse. :P But I like the themes here regardless and I reckon this song would work well with a nice heavy riff with it.

Quality work!

dahotshotda · 03-06-2012, 07:40 AM

thanks do you have any suggestions ? to improve it ? i like to hear also the bad stuff

TheNiceGuy · 03-08-2012, 05:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dahotshotda

thanks do you have any suggestions ? to improve it ? i like to hear also the bad stuff

Personally I'd ditch the last verse with the Troy reference, and instead change it a bit. I don't know why but I feel keeping a bit of ambiguity is better then just flatly stating that it's about the Trojans (or was it from the pov of the Greeks?) Nonetheless the point still stands.

But it's mostly good.

02-20-2012, 04:11 PM	#1 (permalink)
dahotshotda Groupie Join Date: Feb 2012 Posts: 6	my lyrics- battles here it comes..... can't get away from it We pick up our shield and pick up our sword There's no where to run we all hale our lord Blood,bones,wounds we all have to see But theres no running away its our destiny Pride and glory we all shall be praised We all know that this is how legends are made For the king we shall die with no regrets Leaving a legacy for our children to follow our footsteps If god has mercy and lets us live another day It is certainly because we all have prayed The only thing we trust in war is our strengh and power But we know that we all can be dead within the hour We pick up our shield and pick up our sword There's no where to run we all hale our lord Blood,bones,wounds we all will see But theres no running away its our destiny Before charging we all shout our kings name He stands behind us and thinks its all a game We are the soldiers that are dying But he has no shame Counting the victories and getting all the fame United and together we fought all the wars Yelling and screaming banging on the doors Calling the men to come out and fight Help them unite with god and see the white light We picked up our shields and picked up our swords There's no where to run we all hailed our lord We won and got our glorious victory Battle of troy it was called, we made history

03-06-2012, 05:22 AM	#4 (permalink)
TheNiceGuy Living under the bridge Join Date: May 2011 Location: Australia Posts: 317	I was reading this as quite a good social comment on religious wars until the last verse. :P But I like the themes here regardless and I reckon this song would work well with a nice heavy riff with it. Quality work! __________________ My Music Review Blog-It's Only Rock 'n' Roll There is no Dark Side of the Moon really, matter of fact it's all dark...

03-04-2012, 04:39 AM	#3 (permalink)
dahotshotda Groupie Join Date: Feb 2012 Posts: 6	"But theres no running away its our destiny" to be "But we won't run away from our destiny"[/QUOTE] no i dont play on an instrument and youre right there are some parts that you do have to rush with the words.... but i cant put music to it .... im trying to find some1 that can .... \= i also posted new lyrics for another song feel free to give me notes too

03-06-2012, 07:40 AM	#5 (permalink)
dahotshotda Groupie Join Date: Feb 2012 Posts: 6	thanks do you have any suggestions ? to improve it ? i like to hear also the bad stuff