How can i get back to writing like this again?

ShadyCB · 07-21-2011, 03:39 PM

For some reason i felt like i hit a brick wall. I love to write hiphop Lyrics and all that gangsta stuff. (No real G here just for entertainment purposes lol) Now here's my first lyrics BEFORE i hit the wall.

[Intro] Reality check.

[Verse] when im in my nike hoody with the hood pulled up with a nike black soild gloves with'em strapped tight
and a black scarf to cover my face in the night dont try to stop me cause i can snap to do a rob-bery with a
Glock 19 i been into hos-pital more then one time i love to take my anger out on people who just criti-size
because when i shoot from the hip yeah they'll memor-ize 9x19mm i gotta doped up heart and this is the start.

[chrouse] Im in a Nike,Nike, A, Black,Black hoody with Nike, Nike, in a, black,black hoody with a Glock 19.

[Verse] I fight with Guerrilla Warfare i shoot like I'm beast-ing my mates pack up heat-ers with extra
cartid-ges so incase we need-em my mate got a Honda Civic 2006 for 12,000 po-unds with extra ro-unds in the
fifth boot so now theres no need to lo-ot the whip Police Detectives tryna sneak up behind us giving
their little computers enough time to register us and they stop us then they get outta the car
just to hual me out now im stand-ing there with a brown-ing Hi-Power with a .40 S&W now look what happened.

[chrouse] Im in a Nike,Nike, A, Black,Black hoody with Nike, Nike, in a, black,black hoody with a Glock 19.

[Outro] Haha yeah Reality Check.

Now here's AFTER i hit the brick wall and trust me i tried and tried. these lyrics feel alright but i feel like something is missing.

[Intro] Yo lemme take you to the lanes

[Verse] We do drugs alcohol and crush pills even vailumes in pies surprise surprise when i grab
a real Glock 17C (Gun shots) I feel like pissin' on someones diamonds forget respect what lilwayne has
is nothin' like mine i have style Majorly pop some pills then do Beddin's **** C.O.C
smoke some drugs and get ready to rob a big buisness i dont need to be gang bangin' to show
a pansy how much weights i can lift and hold i got a Atri headphone to listen real loud
when im prone in the back yard im a gang soldier.

[Chourse] I'll rob a man or a teen im ready for street war with the cops. im droppin' hoes like rocks.[2x]

[Verse] Rubber black and white gloves with a gallon of gasoline a bunch of twerps we may be
but since we aint gonna die that easyly we still survive each day and every night
I'll put my life to be fighting a historical punk your bleedin' but you lugged me up we both evan
even when i collapse of the cold I'll send my next Hitler enemy to be hospitalized
most of my enemys won't know this till their on life support just realizin' you mess with a beasted gangster.

[Chourse] I'll rob a man or a teen im ready for street war with the cops. im droppin' hoes like rocks.[2x]

Any Advice? also review if you really want.

Mrd00d · 07-21-2011, 03:57 PM

Advice? Reality check yourself, mate. You're out of subject material at the moment because you're making it up. Start over, and this time write about things you're actually familiar with. Write about you.

What's missing in your rhymes, both of them, is any semblance of relatability to your subject. In my opinion. Keep writing.

ShadyCB · 07-21-2011, 04:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mrd00d

Advice? Reality check yourself, mate. You're out of subject material at the moment because you're making it up. Start over, and this time write about things you're actually familiar with. Write about you.

What's missing in your rhymes, both of them, is any semblance of relatability to your subject. In my opinion. Keep writing.

OK thank you for the encouragement

i will keep writing.

**Janszoon** · 07-21-2011, 04:14 PM

Not nearly enough product placement in the second song.

07-21-2011, 03:39 PM	#1 (permalink)
ShadyCB Groupie Join Date: Jul 2011 Location: United Kingdom>England. Posts: 2	How can i get back to writing like this again? For some reason i felt like i hit a brick wall. I love to write hiphop Lyrics and all that gangsta stuff. (No real G here just for entertainment purposes lol) Now here's my first lyrics BEFORE i hit the wall. [Intro] Reality check. [Verse] when im in my nike hoody with the hood pulled up with a nike black soild gloves with'em strapped tight and a black scarf to cover my face in the night dont try to stop me cause i can snap to do a rob-bery with a Glock 19 i been into hos-pital more then one time i love to take my anger out on people who just criti-size because when i shoot from the hip yeah they'll memor-ize 9x19mm i gotta doped up heart and this is the start. [chrouse] Im in a Nike,Nike, A, Black,Black hoody with Nike, Nike, in a, black,black hoody with a Glock 19. [Verse] I fight with Guerrilla Warfare i shoot like I'm beast-ing my mates pack up heat-ers with extra cartid-ges so incase we need-em my mate got a Honda Civic 2006 for 12,000 po-unds with extra ro-unds in the fifth boot so now theres no need to lo-ot the whip Police Detectives tryna sneak up behind us giving their little computers enough time to register us and they stop us then they get outta the car just to hual me out now im stand-ing there with a brown-ing Hi-Power with a .40 S&W now look what happened. [chrouse] Im in a Nike,Nike, A, Black,Black hoody with Nike, Nike, in a, black,black hoody with a Glock 19. [Outro] Haha yeah Reality Check. Now here's AFTER i hit the brick wall and trust me i tried and tried. these lyrics feel alright but i feel like something is missing. [Intro] Yo lemme take you to the lanes [Verse] We do drugs alcohol and crush pills even vailumes in pies surprise surprise when i grab a real Glock 17C (Gun shots) I feel like pissin' on someones diamonds forget respect what lilwayne has is nothin' like mine i have style Majorly pop some pills then do Beddin's **** C.O.C smoke some drugs and get ready to rob a big buisness i dont need to be gang bangin' to show a pansy how much weights i can lift and hold i got a Atri headphone to listen real loud when im prone in the back yard im a gang soldier. [Chourse] I'll rob a man or a teen im ready for street war with the cops. im droppin' hoes like rocks.[2x] [Verse] Rubber black and white gloves with a gallon of gasoline a bunch of twerps we may be but since we aint gonna die that easyly we still survive each day and every night I'll put my life to be fighting a historical punk your bleedin' but you lugged me up we both evan even when i collapse of the cold I'll send my next Hitler enemy to be hospitalized most of my enemys won't know this till their on life support just realizin' you mess with a beasted gangster. [Chourse] I'll rob a man or a teen im ready for street war with the cops. im droppin' hoes like rocks.[2x] Any Advice? also review if you really want.

07-21-2011, 03:57 PM	#2 (permalink)
Mrd00d Stoned and Jammin' Out Join Date: Dec 2010 Location: Northern California; Eugene, OR; mobile Posts: 1,602	Advice? Reality check yourself, mate. You're out of subject material at the moment because you're making it up. Start over, and this time write about things you're actually familiar with. Write about you. What's missing in your rhymes, both of them, is any semblance of relatability to your subject. In my opinion. Keep writing. __________________ Mrd00d's Last.fm

07-21-2011, 04:14 PM	#4 (permalink)
Janszoon Mate, Spawn & Die Join Date: May 2007 Location: The Rapping Community Posts: 24,593	Not nearly enough product placement in the second song. __________________ A Night in the Life of the Invisible Man Time & Place 25 Albums You Should Hear Before the Moon Crashes into the Earth and We All Die last.fm