Scissorman's lyrics and music - Music Banter Music Banter

Go Back   Music Banter > Artists Corner > Song Writing, Lyrics and Poetry
Register Blogging Today's Posts
Welcome to Music Banter Forum! Make sure to register - it's free and very quick! You have to register before you can post and participate in our discussions with over 70,000 other registered members. After you create your free account, you will be able to customize many options, you will have the full access to over 1,100,000 posts.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 03-20-2011, 06:24 AM   #21 (permalink)
Facilitator
 
VEGANGELICA's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Where people kill 30 million pigs per year
Posts: 2,014
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Scissorman View Post

Scissorman, I like the instrumentals very much. They are clean and fairly heavy. I felt the singing was too soft and melodic for the style of the song.

I like the idea of quetioning whether it is a good thing or even possible to run away from memories that are stalking you. The song takes the perspective of the memories themselves, which is interesting.

When you write...

"Your memories will never be gone.
Don’t try to run, don’t try to hide
Cause they still can find you

I know you well
I know you will keep running
And you will keep hiding anyway"

...the first three lines sound as if they are the author talking about the memories rather than the memories themselves talking. I think "Cause they still can find you" should be "Cause I still can find you" to make these lines consistent with the others in the song.

The wording sounds a little stilted to me because you wrote "I know you will keep running" instead of "I know you'll keep running." The singer's pronunciation sounds quite good. Only when she sings words that start with "t" like "try" do I hear that she isn't a native English speaker (I assume).

Again, my main issue with the song is that I feel the style of singing doesn't match the style of the instrumentals. She could be singing a lullaby. Maybe that's what you wanted, though. I'd prefer to feel like the singer is stalking violently or insidiously rather than sweetly.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Neapolitan:
If a chicken was smart enough to be able to speak English and run in a geometric pattern, then I think it should be smart enough to dial 911 (999) before getting the axe, and scream to the operator, "Something must be done! Something must be done!"
VEGANGELICA is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-20-2011, 09:45 AM   #22 (permalink)
art is sold for money
 
Scissorman's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Belgrade, Serbia
Posts: 730
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by VEGANGELICA View Post
Scissorman, I like the instrumentals very much. They are clean and fairly heavy. I felt the singing was too soft and melodic for the style of the song.

I like the idea of quetioning whether it is a good thing or even possible to run away from memories that are stalking you. The song takes the perspective of the memories themselves, which is interesting.

When you write...

"Your memories will never be gone.
Don’t try to run, don’t try to hide
Cause they still can find you

I know you well
I know you will keep running
And you will keep hiding anyway"

...the first three lines sound as if they are the author talking about the memories rather than the memories themselves talking. I think "Cause they still can find you" should be "Cause I still can find you" to make these lines consistent with the others in the song.

The wording sounds a little stilted to me because you wrote "I know you will keep running" instead of "I know you'll keep running." The singer's pronunciation sounds quite good. Only when she sings words that start with "t" like "try" do I hear that she isn't a native English speaker (I assume).

Again, my main issue with the song is that I feel the style of singing doesn't match the style of the instrumentals. She could be singing a lullaby. Maybe that's what you wanted, though. I'd prefer to feel like the singer is stalking violently or insidiously rather than sweetly.

Thank you for your feedback I actually like your suggestion for "Cause I still can find you" and will probably change that in the lyrics Actually, I made the song that way so the vocals would be in contrast with the music; that's what I generally do with my songs. And no, she is not a native speaker but she speaks English almost perfectly
Scissorman is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-24-2011, 04:27 PM   #23 (permalink)
Groupie
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 17
Red face

Really really enjoyed smile. It actually made me smile. I like it because sometimes that is all you can do in this crazy **** storm that we all live in. Just smile. Love it
alicedee07 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-19-2011, 05:03 PM   #24 (permalink)
art is sold for money
 
Scissorman's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Belgrade, Serbia
Posts: 730
Default

Not one of my brightest lyrical moments, but, what the hell I tried really hard to make the music sound ok, so here it is



In The Mirror

I am the one that watches.
I am the savior that stands behind you.
I am the one who trusts you.
Stand up, let go.
I’m waiting for you.

Can you see where life is going.
You are standing, it is moving.
If you sit and just do nothing
It will pass you by.

I am the one who saw you.
You needed help ; that’s why I came to guide you.
I am your guardian angel.
Put down your mask.
And let me help you.

Can you see where life is going.
You are standing, it is moving.
If you sit and just do nothing
It will pass you by.

You wait for something.
What is it that you’re waiting?
Don’t wait, do something.
there is a way.

Can you see where life is going.
You are standing, it is moving.
If you sit and just do nothing
It will pass you by.
Scissorman is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-29-2011, 06:57 PM   #25 (permalink)
art is sold for money
 
Scissorman's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Belgrade, Serbia
Posts: 730
Default

Scissorman is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-03-2011, 02:41 AM   #26 (permalink)
Groupie
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 6
Default

Nice one mate.
__________________
[No advertising]
6lyrics is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-16-2011, 06:53 PM   #27 (permalink)
art is sold for money
 
Scissorman's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Belgrade, Serbia
Posts: 730
Default

I tried to make an orchestral piece, but I couldn't resist, so I added some electronica and I'm not really experienced with either

Scissorman is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-17-2011, 07:36 AM   #28 (permalink)
Account Disabled
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Cebu, Philippines
Posts: 677
Default

i had fun reading the lyrics.
The Virgin is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-11-2011, 06:58 PM   #29 (permalink)
art is sold for money
 
Scissorman's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Belgrade, Serbia
Posts: 730
Default



My music and lyrics. My friend singing. He is not too good, thank god for pitch correction software.
Scissorman is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-12-2011, 05:11 PM   #30 (permalink)
Facilitator
 
VEGANGELICA's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Where people kill 30 million pigs per year
Posts: 2,014
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Scissorman View Post


My music and lyrics. My friend singing. He is not too good, thank god for pitch correction software.
Scissorman, I like the combination of the acoustic guitar with the electronic dance beat (although I'm not a fan of dance songs).

I also like the chorus that has vocal harmony. When the harmony becomes the only vocals at around 1:05, I wish the voice were a little clearer because currently it sounds rather muddied to me. I had to listen to the song several times to understand some of the harmony's words, which I think were a repetition of "She could feel no pain; he made her sing." Also, sometimes it sounds as if the main vocal line surpassed the top recording volume.

I felt the song was organized well (with verses and chorus) and I like the short little ending.

The main feeling I had, though, while listening to the song was confusion: I couldn't understand the meaning of the lyrics even though I could understand most of the words. Did a woman, running and hiding from a screaming stalker, eventually give in to him, feeling no pain as he made her sing?? That seems strange. At first I thought the song was describing rape, and then I wasn't sure *what* the point of the song was. Is the song describing a "Tie Me Up! Tie Me Down!" situation? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tie_Me_Up!_Tie_Me_Down!



BTW, I like the picture with the mushrooms in the background that begins the YouTube video! That is pleasantly odd.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Neapolitan:
If a chicken was smart enough to be able to speak English and run in a geometric pattern, then I think it should be smart enough to dial 911 (999) before getting the axe, and scream to the operator, "Something must be done! Something must be done!"

Last edited by VEGANGELICA; 10-12-2011 at 05:19 PM.
VEGANGELICA is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Similar Threads



© 2003-2024 Advameg, Inc.