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10-10-2010, 01:34 PM | #131 (permalink) | ||||
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Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Where people kill 30 million pigs per year
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I really enjoyed the beautiful piano and delicate drumming at the beginning of your song. Lovely, really. I recommend that instead of adding more layers of vocals, you actually cut some out. For example, rather than starting your vocals as a chorus, I recommend you start singing as a solo. When you sing in chorus, the sound is very murky and muddy...hard for me to understand...so I'd like a solo voice in some places to stand out clearly. My favorite lines are the ones above in bold. The image is very strong: I imagine in my mind's eye this girl (I assume) dangling above her bed from her noose, with her untied shoelaces dangling below her tennis shoes. Although maybe she used her shoelaces to hang herself? You mix sadness and beauty very well. I felt in other places your lyrics were too clear, spelling out the situation too obviously, such as in these lines: Quote:
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But actually, when someone hangs herself, is there much blood? Don't people usually just bleed a little at the mouth? I feel your last two lines cross over into melodrama. When describing a very sad situation, I feel it is hard not to do that. I like the parts of your lyrics when the descriptions are more restrained and poetic. Your song reminds me of "Strange Fruit" sung by Billie Holiday, about white people murdering African American people by hanging them from Southern trees so that the murder victims become "strange fruit," stinking and grimacing with bulging eyes. I felt you may wish to listen to this song since it also describes hanging in a unique and memorable way, similar to your image of the person in your song being like an angel with white laces.
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11-18-2010, 05:27 PM | #132 (permalink) |
myspace.com/stonebirdies
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Conor Oberst Was/is Here
Posts: 1,401
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PLEASE VOTE CONTESTANT #3 Stone Birds
SoundOps MixOff - Fall 2010 |
11-28-2010, 06:48 PM | #133 (permalink) | |
Groupie
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 24
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12-07-2010, 05:28 PM | #135 (permalink) |
myspace.com/stonebirdies
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Conor Oberst Was/is Here
Posts: 1,401
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in "saviour" or in "white laces"?
sav·iour /ˈseɪvyər/ [seyv-yer] –noun 1. a person who saves, rescues, or delivers i wanted to make it obvious that the song wasn't about religeon "Birds are singing of your pain for ye white laces ye blood hath stained" i actually like that kind of diction (when i can understand it) if i made it normal it'd look like this: "Birds are singing of your pain for your white laces your blood has stained" it doesn't have the right feel to it for me personally |
12-29-2010, 05:29 PM | #136 (permalink) |
myspace.com/stonebirdies
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Conor Oberst Was/is Here
Posts: 1,401
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"Golden Houses (DEMO)" Stream and download
In my mind I see fields of flowers Tiny birds flying high, and people with magical powers All our dreams are filled with things we can’t comprehend Like lost loves, bottomless pits and golden houses The riverbed is filled with all of my repressions I think I said that I needed some more therapy sessions cause the patterns they are holding me down in a bind and all of my friends they don’t understand the complexities of the human mind All our dreams are filled with things we can’t comprehend Like lost loves, bottomless pits and golden houses What do I got is it a disease spreading through my memories A twisted order to complicate my already strenuous social standings. All our dreams are filled with things we can’t comprehend Like lost loves, bottomless pits and golden houses the recording is just a demo some voices may be rerecorded i'm having my friend kay do guest vocals, and i'll be adding guitars and possibly some xylophone. PLEASE VOTE FOR ME!!!: Sleigh Bells - "Rachel" http://www.indabamusic.com/submissions/show/40040 Gordon Voidwell - "Ivy League Circus" http://www.indabamusic.com/submissions/show/39038 |
01-13-2011, 05:04 PM | #137 (permalink) |
myspace.com/stonebirdies
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Conor Oberst Was/is Here
Posts: 1,401
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"Caterpillar Song"
Stream and Download "Caterpillar Song"
Oh tiny caterpillar You’re fat and useless Oh little caterpillar You’re weak and small Look at this photograph Look at this smile Did you know that It’s faked Just like the rest in the pile How could I be happy When I felt so alone I was just a bother Hidden like a dog’s bone Oh such a puny cocoon It’s soft and wretched Oh what a worthless cocoon It’s gross and cheap People told me That I was nothing more than Crap in the yard. A little boy with a guitar They said I’d never amount To anything That I was talentless I couldn’t sing Oh beautiful butterfly Alluring and graceful Oh shining butterfly You’re now something people cherish and love It took some time But now I’ve found the ones who can appreciate the sounds I create I finally feel accepted I finally feel like I have wings i'm gonna rerecord the vocals with my snowball mic i originally recorded them with the apple mix bad choice but it'll get fixed. btw i got 9th place in the Sleigh Bells "Rachel" remix contest i'm getting skull candy headphones and a bunch of sleigh bells merch. |
04-28-2011, 07:59 AM | #138 (permalink) |
myspace.com/stonebirdies
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Conor Oberst Was/is Here
Posts: 1,401
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So... Uhmm...
So… Uhmm… i’m thinking about rerecording all my songs or atleast parts of all my songs i’m thinking about going for a slightly different sound this basically includes these: Da Da Demos by Stone Birds on SoundCloud - Create, record and share your sounds for free (once link is outdated i’ll put a strikethrough in) basically what i’m gonna do for the most part is rerecord vocals and replace some of the drum programs with actual drums and percussion. and i’m gonna try to make it all more natural sounding. this means no more recording vocals at 1 a.m. so if any of you think you want to keep the original recordings i’d download them now in fact i'm thinking about changing my moniker |
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