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09-08-2008, 04:53 AM
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#11 (permalink) | ||
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county fair energy
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 4,773
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Message in a Bottle
I've tightened the cork
To the bottle I'm sending I'm ready to find a new shore. I think I'll be fine In the waves of the ocean As long as I wash up on yours. Drifting with hope And my fingers crossed twice I'm holding my breath all the way. I sing with the moonlight And dance to the foam While the current just lifts me away. I've whispered your name Through the cracks of my dreams Let it pass through my lips like a song. If I'm a blank page You're a true poet's pen We were meant to be "us" all along. So search through the driftwood, Sand, small bits of shell, Whatever else you may discover. In the bottle I sent you Filled up with my love There is me for you to uncover.
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#DEMODFROWNLAND #TERMLIMITSFORMODERATORS |
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09-11-2008, 04:32 PM
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#13 (permalink) | ||
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county fair energy
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 4,773
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Why thank you.
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#DEMODFROWNLAND #TERMLIMITSFORMODERATORS |
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09-11-2008, 10:41 PM
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#15 (permalink) | ||
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county fair energy
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 4,773
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No.
Well yes, But no.
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#DEMODFROWNLAND #TERMLIMITSFORMODERATORS |
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09-21-2008, 07:36 PM
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#16 (permalink) | ||
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county fair energy
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 4,773
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Sandpaper
You are sandpaper.
You wear me down; Thin my shell to its weakest state, Leave me nearly exposed. You only look tough. You're still paper beneath the grit. Easily torn. Quickly discarded. I've deafened myself. As defense. From your lines of lies and bullshit. I've blinded myself. As defense. From watching you spin your falsities. Grinding holes into any place You settle too long.
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#DEMODFROWNLAND #TERMLIMITSFORMODERATORS Last edited by WWWP; 10-14-2008 at 02:31 PM. |
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09-28-2008, 02:23 AM
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#17 (permalink) | ||
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county fair energy
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 4,773
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Alaska Squirrel
How fast can you run now Alaska Squirrel? lol.
Can you last til the November vote? You'd better move quickly, get out of Alaska, Before Palin turns you into a tote! Run little rodent as fast as you can. Palin will hit you with her mini-van. Alaska.... (ALASKA!!) Alaskan Squirrel. Alaska.... (ALASKA!!) Alaskan Squirrel. Hurry away now, Alaska Squirrel And be wary of mavericks and sluts. McCain, he won't catch you, 'cause he is too slow But she'll get you by taking your nuts! Run little rodent as fast as you can. Palin will hit you with her mini-van. Alaska.... (ALASKA!!) Alaskan Squirrel. Alaska.... (ALASKA!!) Alaskan Squirrel. Scamper away now Alaska Squirrel Make your way to a higher ground. Palin's melting Alaska with her evil death eyes Soon all the polar bears will be drowned. Run little rodent as fast as you can. Palin will hit you with her mini-van. Alaska.... (ALASKA!!) Alaskan Squirrel. Alaska.... (ALASKA!!) Alaskan Squirrel. 
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#DEMODFROWNLAND #TERMLIMITSFORMODERATORS Last edited by WWWP; 09-28-2008 at 04:40 AM. |
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09-28-2008, 03:05 AM
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#18 (permalink) | ||
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Da Hiphopopotamus
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: cloud cuckoo land
Posts: 4,034
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should be done by a grindcore band
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10-14-2008, 05:03 AM
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#20 (permalink) |
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Account Disabled
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: high above the Republic of Texas
Posts: 216
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You've jumped tenses and may want to correct that.
i like the poem and with very minor changes it will be excellent! That last line is really good, and could be KILLER if you find another word for 'sit.' (i've found that a thesaurus is an extremely valuable tool for writing pretty much anything ~ it's like adding watercolor to a charcoal drawing ~ makes it more interesting and gives you more power for expression.) Thanx for sharing! |
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