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12-01-2007, 11:10 AM | #1 (permalink) |
Music Addict
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Ireland
Posts: 158
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Songs and Daughters
)))))))))))))
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There’s something about seeing this city at night
Where we can say what we want and do what we like. These streets are empty but we don't feel alone, We can run in the dark and sleep on the roads. Last edited by Dizzys in the wolf; 08-20-2009 at 03:00 PM. |
12-10-2007, 11:18 AM | #3 (permalink) |
Music Addict
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Ireland
Posts: 158
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Its about a relationship I was in with a boy while he was dating another girl and how people reacted to me being part of it all and how it affected me. The story is in there, and the form is there. If you read it you'll see that I even said it is a Sonnet.
__________________
There’s something about seeing this city at night
Where we can say what we want and do what we like. These streets are empty but we don't feel alone, We can run in the dark and sleep on the roads. |
12-10-2007, 07:34 PM | #6 (permalink) |
Ad Astra
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 730
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If I recall, you're the one who'd rather have this entire thing turned into one big poetry fest. I'm here for music, and nothing else. I don't like lyrics unless they tell a story, and flow well with music. I'll rate the songs, and I'll leave you to give good marks on the poems.
This one has absolutely no story in it, and if it does, it's one only the author can perceive. To each his own opinion. |
12-10-2007, 07:41 PM | #8 (permalink) |
Ad Astra
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 730
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This is coming from the same man who'd usually rip someone a new ass for rhyming. Every last word of this piece of work, rhymes with the last word of the next line. Be consistant, even if it is in judgement. Personally, that doesn't bother me nearly as much, if it's in such a slow pace that it flows nicely. But I see no flow to it, and I'd rate this no different if even you had posted it. But if you like it, then cheers to you. Not my cup of tea.
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