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04-17-2007, 08:07 PM | #1 (permalink) |
Me and The Major
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Kentucky
Posts: 1,830
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The Lone Gunman In The Silent Hall
The title sucks, as does the third stanza and I would like help with said stanza. Overall, it's a different stlye and is more personal, so let me know what you think:
The Lone Gunman In The Silent Hall I loosened the colar of my shirt though I was breathing just fine, before I realized That I've been trapped in a box for The past seventeen years. The burden of culture has come crashing Down on me, and all I can think of Is just how betrayed and deceived I've been While with faith. That tree out of my window could be replaced With a dog or a daisy and no difference Would really be made. I'm hitting the floor again, grasping for Breath, wanting to feel oxygen yet also Wanting to feel the pain that these thoughts Have brought upon me. It's not that bad, to not be breathing, for Sometimes I just need to feel this, need To feel my lungs caving in as I raise a Finger at the heavens. "You did this to me," I feel as though I've Been deceived by him and yet I know that I decided to believe. There are no more caged birds that can Sing a lovely tune to me, and make My bridge stand a little better on its own, For I know I'm alone. Even the angel who has been crying for Me for the past hour could ultimately Not mean anything to this world for we Never do leave this world. The cherub is screaming, telling me to Hold on, hold on to her, but I know that I want to leave, but can't. I feel like the lone gunman in the silent hall As I shoot down all of the stars and all Of the birds that used to make my day So light and merry. "**** you!" I raise my voice to the unending atmosphere. I know he's not there even Though I really need him to be for I'm So tired of being alone. Maybe, maybe it would be a blessing to be So ignorant and full of bliss, maybe then I'll never cry again. Last edited by The Dave; 04-19-2007 at 03:24 PM. |
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