Kevorkian Logic

Kudos for trying to ride a steer. Tough ****. What happened when you tried? Cause i've seen some pretty entertaining/impressive sights when people attempt to ride steers.

It's good that you appreciate having a rural background, i'm going to sound cliche saying this, but I truly believe it builds character. I have found that purely urban inhabitants have a much more jaded and cynical view of life, and don't appreciate some simple things at all. I'm trying not to sound like i'm talking about something I know nothing about, because I am technically a "city" person, I live in Raleigh and my parents have apartments in mainly big cities: NY, Atlanta, London, Berlin, Brussels, and Oslo that I visit on weekends or breaks. But we have a family farm, which my mom loves and since I was little have spent many weeks living (I mainly helped with the animals, which often entailed me getting attacked by this devil turkey). But I thought it gave me a greater appreciation for the simpler life, and some of the unexpected joys that it gives you.

I really enjoyed reading those two things you remember about your grandfather. They have that simple sort of profoundness that I believe only older people possess. Especially the god thing, that's going to stick with me for a while. The quotes just reflect his character so well, I can imagine just how he acts day to day.

I'm going for the color, for if my physics knowledge is accurate (it's not always) Red is the color with the highest frequency. And i'm convinced that the human mind is fascinated by objects that emit a high frequency. While objects with low frequencies are dull and soothing to the mind.

15 manuscripts is a hell of a lot of writing, just wow. Do you want to be a professional writer? I'm interested in what you have written though, is there anyway you could send on of your manuscripts or "Red Number Fives" to me? But re-writing is a bitch, partly because I often take criticism as a personal attack and my grammatical skills rival that of a chimpanzee. This national write a novel month is an weird idea to me. A know a couple of girls at my school who participated in it and their novels turned out to have weak plots and weak diction. Yours could be amazing, but I feels as though the time pressure hinders you in a way that you don't really write what you want to say, because your in such a hurry to finish it. Does that make sense?

Suggest as many books as you like, I was in a book dry spell honestly. I actually have never read Invisible Monster. A friend lent me Fight Club last year (which reminds me I need to return the book to her) and I enjoyed it immensely, so I will definitely check out Invisible Monster. Hahaha, I wish I would of responded that way, I was just so ashamed I had made a fool out of myself, again (I have the annoying tendency to do that).

Thank you so much for sharing those moments with me, it meant a lot to know someone else can be so overcome with beauty. I actually know many people who have actually attended Montessori, so I definitely will ask them about it. Your description makes it seem like too great an opportunity to miss. I saw Amelie about 4 years ago, so I honestly don't remember it that well, I just remember it being amazing. But I will find it in the mess of a house I live in and watch it again. On the subject of French movies though, there is this French movie called He Loves Me He Loves Me Not, which was really interesting. It's one of those movies where the plot twist saves it and transforms it into a great movie. It's worth a watch.

Do you like snow/cold? I am not a huge fan of it, although it can be truly refreshing. There is some quality about the cold that makes my body just want to stop. Or are you one of those people who are immune to the depressing qualities of cold?

I wonder how many other people are reading the probably wordiest post ever on this sight? I never really thought about it until today when I saw how many views this page had. Probably people see all the words, get intimidated, and run. That sounds very human.

__________________
"it is only through a limitless accumulation of the imperfect that a certain type of perfection can be attained"

ItsRed

Agog, that's me today, choo-chooing all day like a retarded train. Band mates wanting to jam again, another friend wanting stills from a short film project we were working on, a lady from PSU (Portland) wanting to do an interview concerning 'how people learn' and some poker party (I took a big pass on that though). I have some vicodin and a bottle of pinot noir to decompress, but that's going to wait.

Wow, there are a lot of views on this thread I wonder if it's read in a serial way? If people read current post as an episode? I'm sure no one can read it consecutive, in one sitting. I kind of want to go back and read it all the way through now, but I'm sure there are many things I missed. Stuff I'll want to edit.

You are more than welcome to read my stuff, but the novel is just such a mess. I have some shorts I wrote about a year ago that might be better. I think if you read excerpts from the novel you would only see the former fourth grade english failure in my writing. Of course, none of it is great 'writing' (shrunk and white would roll over in their graves (if they're not dead already, they should be)), but every once in a while I'll get on a roll. As far as being a writer, making any kind of career out of it...it'd be nice, but it's highly doubtful for several reasons. Mainly I write for its own end, the thought, the immersion into characters and plot. I know the characteristics needed in storytelling and I know I don't write that way. But it isn't like I haven't tried to sell stuff, try and make a career out of it, I do have plenty of rejection letters.

On the Red, it's actually from a marketing school of thought (the name of which escapes me now) consisting of using block of Red and White with shapes of Black imposed, but it's made to manipulate attention from the human eye so I'm sure the frequency was the main consideration.

The steer riding was comical, little me all stupid and brave, throwing the chest out like my uncle showed me. I was on it for probably five seconds. My uncle had named the steer 'widow maker.' And as soon as the chute open, widow maker went directly over to the plank fence and brushed little stupid and brave me off on my ass.

With the rural influences I do think it grounds in a practical side of life that escapes those that don't get exposed to it, but it was a spotty infrequent exposure for me. I lol'd the Devil Turkey, I remember being terrorized by a rooster, they just come at you with everything they got. My grandfather kept telling me, 'Just kick him...he's not going to stop until you kick him.' But I thought I'd kill it, then my grandfather just came over and punted it about twenty feet in the air.

There also seems a difference in the coasts (east and west) and the mid-west with formative upbringing. I think San Francisco is probably the most comparable urban city to the east coast cities. I spent a little time down there as the former girlfriends' family lived there and liked the feel, the aloof autonomy, the value on intellect and arts. Seattle does have its cosmopolitan aspects, same with Portland, but they are definitely not cities like the east coast. Besides layovers for connecting flights Athens, Greece is the only international city I've been to and that was only a couple days in and out from the islands.

I will check out 'He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not.' Jeunet (wrote and directed Amelie) also did some earlier films with Marc Caro. The City of Lost Children and Delicatessen, I really liked both of those. Actually the question, 'Or are you one of those who are immune to the depressing qualities of the cold?' Reminded me of a scene from The City of Lost Children. Where the scientist asks the boy, ' Are you unsusceptible to the effects of the full moon?' It shouldn't give anything away if you haven't seen it yet.

And the cold, I hate it, can't stand it. I moved back here to help the grandparents with the farm as they're getting older, but I was so pissed that first winter last year. It seemed to snow from November until March. Drove me crazy. But when it started snowing a couple days ago I found myself enjoying just watching it. There was just something beautiful in how it was falling, how it was coming down so soft at the time. How it was moving, swirling, it was like I could see the shape of air. Like the invisible man was being revealed. Nice, but it'd be nice to be in the tropics too.

I set up an email account just for this forum so I don't mind posting it here. I'll send a short, or two, then maybe some rough chapters if you can stand the shorts.
ittlered05@yahoo.com

__________________
Dark Circle : They're here. Rocking your black night world since 2007.
http://www.unsignedbandweb.com/music/bands/7789/

Kevorkian Logic

Woah, I was not aware you were in a band or working on a short film, plus all the other stuff you apparently are wanted for. Kudos. You are doing more than I could ever imagine participating in at once. The vicodin thing reminds me of House, do you ever have time to watch that show? If not, your not missing too much, it's better than most of the purely sex-driven shows that seem to make up television, but it's not spectacular (Hugh Laurie pretty much makes the show). Why don't you like poker though? I have some pretty fond memories of playing poker.

Yea, I don't think anyone has the attention span to read through this entire post in a sitting. I'm surprised their are views/other people reading it. I never really consider what I say terribly interesting. And only one other person on this forum knows me personally, but we don't really talk and know so little about the other that he wouldn't care to read this. I guess people could pick up some good books and movies from reading this. I hope somebody who does read this will get the message of my small rant, and reply with an answer to the question.

You were raised with Strunk and White as well? I find that pretty funny, how people can live in total different places, but be raised on similar books.

What would you prefer me to read? Some people actually like others reading their rougher material, so i'm unsure of what you would prefer. I just love reading others peoples work because it tells you so much about their own character and often their wishes. For example, there is this one girl at my school who often writes these surreal, acid like stories, where she often is always surrounded by boys who want her. Those stories embody her wishes and dreams because the acid element is her always trying give off the vibe that she's this hippie, when she never actually has done hard drugs. The her being surrounded by guys is mainly how all her friends are males (she's very possessive over them, humorous to me) and how she wishes she is wanted by them all, even though in real life, as far as I have noticed (I pay very little attention to her group so I could be wrong) she is not.
I don't know if I made sense. I'm a little manic right now, so i'm trying to tone down the chatter that comes with it, but it's hard.

It's good that you write just to write, and not worry about if it fits a good "story." That often is the best kind, in my opinion(which sadly is not often the publics opinion).

I am faced with a moral delima though. In case you didn't know, I am bipolar. I don't like telling people because they judge and often consider me invalid and useless when they find out. But I was diagnosed when I was an adolescent, and they have very few records of adolescents with bipolar, so they want to publish my person journal mainly to help other teenagers who who suffer from this. I still am a teenager though, and they want to later publish a second journal, as one like after I learned to control. I don't want to personally, way to invasive of my personal space, and it seems really odd to have my personal thoughts on sale in a bookstore. But i'm torn because it apparently will help a lot of teenagers as well. You seem to have more wisdom than all of my friends, opinion, please?

Your bull riding story made me smile(i'm a bit sadistic, sorry). "Window maker" is a weird ass name for a bull though. Do you happen to know why the bull was blessed with name, "window maker?"

The Rooster story made me 'lol' as well, something about a rooster flying 20 feet through the air because your grandfather punted it is extremely humorous.

I know what you mean about difference of coasts. The West has always seemed very relaxed and intellectual to me, while the East is busy, high stress, bohemian artsy. Athens was scary urbanized to me, except for the Acropolis (Parthenon) and the blue, blue sea I did not really enjoy it. The islands are definitely what you want to go to, did you go to San Terianne (sp?) by any chance?

I'll check out the other two films as well. I'm one of those wierd people who tends to like foreign films more than American ones, which is ironic because I am absolutely terrible at foreign languages, hence me taking Latin.

Haha, your right, snow can be beautiful, but so can the tropics. And I would be lying if I said I didn't enjoy the snow on occasion. That must of taken a lot though to move to the North to help out your grandparents, really really amazingly sweet though.

I just read the end and saw that you were sending me the shorts, so ignore the question at the top. sorry. My email is swwheaton@gmail.com (I used to have a more creative email address, but it was starting to seem way to childish, especially for college stuff.)

Oscar nights tonight, and I can't decide if I care enough to watch. My dad was telling me all about the pomegranate martini that is spoused to be the new drink at the Oscars, the fact he knows that really discourages me from watching.

__________________
"it is only through a limitless accumulation of the imperfect that a certain type of perfection can be attained"

ItsRed

Most of my writing is on my laptop, so I'll look for some stuff to send tonight, but I may not get around to sending it until I get back from work in the morning.

I watched Amelie again and saw that she actually makes the tapes for the glass man, rather than the other way around. Pretty great movie. I think I've seen it probably six times now.

I haven't watched television in over a year, I did buy some episodes of The Office on iTunes and a DVD of the English versions first series. I just can't stand commercials.

As for handing over your personal journals, I don't have a huge confidence in the psychological community. I do think your journals could help others feel less alienated and provide them with insights as to what is happening, as well possibly give them insight into things that might trigger a depressive, or manic episode. And I do think that with you knowing about it, while writing the journal, it adds a level of recognition that could be increasingly beneficial. Of course there is a down side to having a journal published, or even writing one, but I do think there is a sincere benefit.

I don't really know much about the disorder, or what's physiologically associated as the neurological cause (chemical, or anatomical, or ??). I do know that there is a preponderance of stimuli that is targeted to get inside a persons' mind and if they're sensitive to such stimulus it could be very detrimental on just a processing level. I don't recall the full title, but I read a marketing book called Positioning: (Something like: 'the fight for the consumer mind') that was written in the 70's, when things were even less competitive. That book, along with Restak book The Brain: (something) made me realize there could very easily be neurological repercussions, particularly in the hyper-sensitive, from insidious marketing/ targeting activities as the brain works in a system that can be thrown out of whack, destabilized.

I'll try and read up on it, let me know if you have some suggested reading.


The only island I was on for any length of time (8 days) was Spetse, where my father lived for a year in in the 80's. I'd like to go back, I was amazed at how clear the Mediterranean is. I went during the pre-Iraq rhetoric so in Athens there was people rioting around the embassy everyday.

Oh you may, or may not have realized it was 'widow' as in a wife who's husband has died. Just a good ol' country way of saying, man-killer.

Gawd the time just flies by, I was going to look at my other post and see if it needed to be edited, because I was so tired. Oh, the short film was being worked on awhile ago, but has long since been abandoned and the band was on hiatus, but they're wanting to jam again, it's cyclical.

It always feels like I'm missing something in every post.

__________________
Dark Circle : They're here. Rocking your black night world since 2007.
http://www.unsignedbandweb.com/music/bands/7789/

Kevorkian Logic

I have quite a bit of work to do tonight, and I really want to sit down an read your work as well as you have read mine. So i'm going to do that tonight and make a big reply with all the commentary on your two stories tommorrow. I hope that is ok with you. I feel bad because you do so much and have time to reply and comment on my work, and I don't have time to do it all tonight, sorry.

From the glance i've given your stories though they have a really nice, very contemporary way of writing, which I personally enjoy.

Sorry again.

__________________
"it is only through a limitless accumulation of the imperfect that a certain type of perfection can be attained"

ItsRed

Those are real short, but it was pretty frustrating to realize I no longer had the WordPerfect program installed on the laptop. Had to download AbiWord on to the Mac and convert to Word in order to see which was what, because the titles were originally numeric and could have been letters. Also, as a point of interest, they were in a sub-folder, of a folder titled 'crap.'

I was thinking about that question and had that idea of 'pure being' (from 'I Heart Huckabees') come to mind. But also from the movie there is the realization that it's unsustainable. Whether it's 'human drama,' or just how there's this seemingly constant induction into the ineffectual, or even attention span it's unsustainable, but I don't think whether it's sustainable, or not is the question really. If you haven't seen it I think you would like it immensely. It's a must see.

Please feel free to send anything, I do have a lot going on, but will read and will respond eventually. It's probably going to be the weekend before I have a chance to bust the novel into chapters, but at least it's written in Word. But I know if I start editing it too much it'll never get sent. It's bad, I did say I wrote it in a month.

Hopefully sometime this week I'll get this song up, but I've been unable to keep it from peaking and still be at a listen-able volume. It's mostly bad, but there are these two guitar progression that have the kind of soft sonic looming I like. If I post it I'll let you know, most of it's laughably terrible though.

__________________
Dark Circle : They're here. Rocking your black night world since 2007.
http://www.unsignedbandweb.com/music/bands/7789/

Kevorkian Logic

I just read that, for some reason i missed that you commented on it on both, this and the user cp.

I just finished both of your short-stories. I actually really like them. I wrote comments all over the pages, so i'm going to see if I can scan them onto the computer and send you the scans, with my other page of typed comments. It's going to take some serious computer skills, which I lack though, so give me a bit of time to figure it out. I really liked "Invisible," it had some truly amazing lines and ideas. Especially the cutting of the index finger and cooking it and the becoming less visible after you were already invisible and how when you fade your aspirations fade, truly great stuff.

__________________
"it is only through a limitless accumulation of the imperfect that a certain type of perfection can be attained"

ItsRed

Well thanks for reading them, I wrote them as part of a Writer's Group that quickly became a Drinking Group. I'd just flail out some little attempt at a story like the day before. There were a couple I liked, the longest was probably 5 pages. And I'm thrilled you got the major idea of 'Invisible.' I'll try and get some other shorts converted and maybe send one with a chapter this weekend.

The song is sucking more than the alloted quota of ass, so hopefully when the group jams next I can get some real drums, bass and get the reverb down off vocals. I keyboarded the drums and gawd it's awful. So bad that I actually tried to mic hitting one of my canvas with wooden spoons...funny awful.

I did post some videos in the Promotion section (thread: alpo: the videos) a while ago, if you're interested. They're pretty terrible, but the effort was minimal.

__________________
Dark Circle : They're here. Rocking your black night world since 2007.
http://www.unsignedbandweb.com/music/bands/7789/

Kevorkian Logic

i'll find the thread and check you out.


I'm so shocked your on at a normal time. What happened?

__________________
"it is only through a limitless accumulation of the imperfect that a certain type of perfection can be attained"

ItsRed

An itchy beard woke me up early, had to get up and shave. I was really starting to look quite the hick, it'd been like three weeks. But I'm going to nap now, well try, right up till I have to leave for work.

__________________
Dark Circle : They're here. Rocking your black night world since 2007.
http://www.unsignedbandweb.com/music/bands/7789/