Jadix

When I finally find someone perfect
I wonder if all of this sh!t will be worth it
Will it all add up to make this much better?
Or will I regret what I went through to get her?

And this is assuming that someone is truly
Going to be there when I get through this
But so far it seems life isn't just for me
So far it seems like its randomly happening

Maybe dreams just keep us all trying
to Keep us from falling, from failing and dying
No guarentees that they aren't all lying
No guarentees that you wont die hiding

I'll set my goals modestly in reach
Just to be able to raise a good family
Someone who's worth it will just make me happy
No guarentees but I...still dream.

DontRunMeOver

This song's generally a lot better than the, um, other one of yours I just critiqued. Needs a chorus/hookline, you could use this one of yours

"Maybe dreams just keep us all trying
to Keep us from falling, from failing and dying
No guarentees that they aren't all lying
No guarentees that you wont die hiding"

Or maybe just the first two lines of that

"Maybe dreams just keep us all trying
to Keep us from falling, from failing and dying
Maybe dreams just keep us all trying
to Keep us from falling, from failing and dying"

Or something a bit shorter and simpler. Do it!

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Alo

I couldn't even get through it. There are a thousand songs just like this. And you go from one thing to another, which don't really seem related. Kind of messy. And I also agree with Don'tRunMeOver, try that, and then let it be reviewed again.

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I rocked my shoelaces untied