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04-18-2006, 04:27 AM | #11 (permalink) |
Don't think twice
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: A basement on the hill
Posts: 352
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mm i see what you mean. what do you suggest then , line or word or something. i was originally trying to think like harmony or note but it didnt work out.
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Painstaking devotion and love Surrendered to self preservation From others who care for themselves A blindness that touches perfection But hurts just like anything else Isolation, isolation, isolation |
04-18-2006, 05:18 AM | #13 (permalink) | |
They call me Tundra Boy
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: In your linen cupboard.
Posts: 1,166
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Quote:
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04-18-2006, 05:43 AM | #14 (permalink) |
Don't think twice
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: A basement on the hill
Posts: 352
|
yeah ithink ill change it to word. thanks for the help. and im gonna record it soon and stick on myspace.
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Painstaking devotion and love Surrendered to self preservation From others who care for themselves A blindness that touches perfection But hurts just like anything else Isolation, isolation, isolation |
04-18-2006, 03:40 PM | #15 (permalink) |
that's my war face.
Join Date: Nov 2005
Posts: 1,418
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****ing.
Brilliant. One of the best works I've seen. This is how you do it, people. I hate to say it but I feel the 'ain't home yet' but at the end of each line doesn't fit in, at least when I read it. It probably does the way you've got it worked, but to me it seems a little bit fiddly. |
04-19-2006, 01:58 AM | #16 (permalink) |
Don't think twice
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: A basement on the hill
Posts: 352
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thanks hobo man much appreciated.
__________________
Painstaking devotion and love Surrendered to self preservation From others who care for themselves A blindness that touches perfection But hurts just like anything else Isolation, isolation, isolation |
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