Trollheart

Episode title: “Lonely Among Us”
Season: 1
Importance: 1 (mostly for Data’s interest in Sherlock Holmes)
Crisis point(s) if any: Picard leaves the ship to become a being of pure energy. Sorry, a BALD being of pure energy.
Original transmission date: November 2 1987
Writer(s): Michael Halperin (teleplay by D.C. Fontana)
Director: Cliff Bole
Stardate:* 41249.3
Destination: Parliament
Mission (if any): Deliver delegates of two warring nations to a conference
Main character(s) in Plot: Picard
Main character(s) in Subplot (if any): Riker, Data
Not appearing:
Villain/Monster (if any): Alien intelligence
Deaths: 1
Lives saved (episode): 1 (Picard)
Lives saved (cumulative): 3
Locations:

Shipboard:
Transporter Room
Bridge
SIckbay
Engineering
Beverly’s Quarters
Outside the quarters assigned to the Antican
Observation Lounge
Ready Room


Space:
Energy cloud

Other:


Ships/vessels: 0
Space battles: 0
Bodycount
0
Historical
0
Incidental
1 :Assistant Engineer Singh

Direct
0
Total: 1
Running total: 84
Make it so: 0
Engage! 0
Combat factor: 0
Planets visited: 0
Planets mentioned: Parliament
Mysteries: Presence of alien intelligence on the ship
Patients in sickbay:1 (Worf)
Data v Humanity: Data falls under the spell of Sherlock Holmes, an obsession that will grow.
Data 1 - Humanity 3
Character scores:
Picard 10
Riker 10
Troi 20
Bev 10
Geordi 10
Data 45
Worf 10
Wesley 10
Yar 10
O’Brien 10
Earl Grey: 0
Shuttlecraft: 0
Admirals: 0
Starbases: 0
First contact: Alien cloudy intelligence thing
Humour: 4
Episode rating: 5/10
Episode score: 290

After the pretty great “Where No One Has Gone Before” it was probably unlikely they’d get another episode as good, and no they don’t, but it’s close. Basically though it’s pretty much the TOS episode “Journey to Babel” rewritten: same idea; delegates being ferried to a conference and the Enterprise crew have to keep them apart. But the subplot about the alien intelligence is good, though I see it having been lifted later for the Babylon 5 episode “All Alone in the Night”, which is kind of odd, as the title is somewhat similar. Hey! Doesn’t Beverly look like a Borg when she examines Worf in sickbay? Don’t tell Picard! Why, when the alien leaves her and she finds herself, to her surprise, on the bridge, with no idea how she got there, does she not report it? Surely this is odd to her, and she should report any such weirdness to Picard? But she just smiles and goes back to her quarters.


"Resistance is futile! You will be assimilated!"
(Come on: the caption writes itself!)

As things begin to break down, Picard is most upset when Data tells him subspace radio is out. Surely he can at least get BALD FM? No dice, says Data. This episode is the genesis for Data’s ongoing interest in Sherlock Holmes, which produced some great episodes, including holodeck ones. Nice to see Bev out of uniform (stop that!), wearing a pretty red dress. A little too much Wesley for my tastes, but then, a second of Wesley is too much Wesley. The first time Picard is relieved of command (or at least, an attempt is made to do so), and slightly looking back to the terrible series finale of TOS, though Picard refrains from being as brutal as Kirk, and instead just orders Beverly, Riker and Troi to report to sick bay.

"Mom, I'm not Captain Picard: can you please take your hand off my leg?"

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The Batlord

Beverly Cusser. Same character but her bedside manner leaves something to be desired.

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Trollheart

She gets her patients addicted and then supplies their addiction for a cost: she's Doctor Pusher!

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Trollheart

We're now six episodes in. Four more and I'll begin posting the episode chart, see which is doing better than the others. For now though, here's our sixth character chart, with a few small changes.

Not surprisingly, Yar remains on top and in fact the top three stay the same, while Data's efforts in this episode allow him to nudge Doctor Crusher further down the chart to number 5, while he picks up fourth place, rising three from last episode's position of seventh. This means Geordi has to make room for the doc and slides one to sixth while she takes fifth, pushing Geordi to displace his captain, who falls two places to eighth place as Deanna, a non-mover, remains at seventh. Another non-mover, Worf remains at nine while Q falls to ten, but expect him a resurgence from him soon. O'Brien, still with hardly anything to do and only a few lines, actually falls out of the top ten to become the first character to occupy the eleventh spot.

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Trollheart

It's official: there's something wrong with me.

For some reason I thought we were past "Skin of Evil" and Yar was dead, so I reduced her points to zero and was talking about her not being here any more. Thanks to those kind individuals who just retreated, not making eye contact, smiling indulgently while reaching for the phone, and did not tell me I was, well, as wrong as could be. I don't know why I thought we were where we were, but I've been going through a bad divorce, the kids, the job... actually none of that is true. I'm not married (who'd marry me, now honestly?) and I have no kids, a fact for which the world breathes a collective sigh of relief. I guess, put it down to old age.

Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah: stay out of my booze.
Now, withour further ado, and with a Yar far more alive than I had thought, on we go.

Episode title: “Justice”
Season: 1
Importance: 0
Crisis point(s) if any: Wesley not being put to death, sorry, Wesley being sentenced to death
Original transmission date: November 9 1987
Writer(s): Worley Thorne, Ralph Wills
Director: James L. Conway
Stardate:* 41255.6
Destination: Rubicun III
Mission (if any): None; first contact and then shore leave. Everyone can let their hair down. Um. With one important exception.
Main character(s) in Plot: Wesley
Main character(s) in Subplot (if any):
Not appearing: O’Brien
Villain/Monster (if any): Big machine orbiting planet. Answers to “God”.
Deaths: 0
Lives saved (episode): 1 (Wesley)
Lives saved (cumulative): 4
Locations:

Shipboard:
Bridge
Observation Deck

Space:
Orbit of the planet

Other:
Rubicun III


Ships/vessels: 1 (this “God” thing)
Space battles: 0
Bodycount

Historical
0
Incidental
0
Direct
0
Total: 0
Running total: 84


Make it so: 0
Engage! 0
Combat factor: 0
Planets mentioned:
Mysteries: What is this “God” thing anyway?
Patients in sickbay: 0
Data v humanity: Data operates as a way to exchange information with “god” so
Data 2 - Humanity 3
Character scores:
Picard 0
Riker 25
Troi 15
Bev 10
Geordi 10
Data 10
Worf 15
Wesley 60
Yar 25
O’Brien 0

Earl Grey: 0
Shuttlecraft: 0
Admirals: 0
Starbases: 0
First contact: 2 (The Edo; they shouldn’t have bothered. No such thing as a free ride. Literally. Also the god thing)
Humour: 0
Episode rating: 3/10 (It’s awful, but I give it some small credit for not taking the easy way out, and having Picard give the Edo the finger. Not like that. It would be… inappropriate.)
Episode score: 155

So do we call this a sexist episode? Well, it’s hard to say. It’s not like women - or men - are being treated any differently. It’s certainly a sexually-charged one, which to some degree makes me wonder how it got through the censor? I mean, sure, there’s no nudity (though a lot of flesh is on display) but the overall feeling is one of promiscuity, and in America, and especially on American TV, that’s usually a big no-no. Of course, these are the permissive 80s, so maybe. Bush wouldn’t spoil everyone’s fun by trying to drag the US back into the 1950s for another two years, and Ronnie wasn’t too bothered, so maybe. You have to wonder though, would the theme from Benny Hill be out of place here? So much running around in skimpy costumes. Americans wouldn’t have got it though. You don’t get it, do you? Probably just as well.

I’m sure I didn’t think this when I first saw it, but I’m thinking it now, even though I know it’s wrong. With everyone so pretty and handsome and vital, what of the older folk? How can they run around and would constant sex not wear them out? Is it possible this is a Logan’s Run deal, where people only live to a certain age, so that all are young? I mean, yes, it’s not what happened, but it could have been part of the reason why this planet is too good to be true. There’s never any worse comment than “It’s like Eden”, because there’s always something slithering through the grass.

"Why can't our God invent the fucking wheel? I swear, if I have to run one more time..."

It’s quite funny when the Enterprise is put on high alert because what appears to be a soap bubble has penetrated the ship! When asked by the bubble why they left colonists on the last planet they were on (not that it’s any of its fucking business, but anyhow) Picard says the colonists had sought to create a new lifestyle. The bubble could have said “A gay planet? Not in my system, buster!” But sadly, it does not. Oh well. Makes you wonder though what the hell these losers do all day? How can you sit around kissing and fondling and having great sex and you know what that sounds great: where is this planet again? But seriously: how does anything get done? We all remember the similarly named Eloi, don’t we? Huh? Huh?

This idea of the Punishment Zone: weird huh? No signs, no warnings, anywhere could be the Punishment Zone at any time, so nobody breaks any laws in case it just happens that they do so within the PZ. But then, isn’t that the elimination of crime due to terror? And how can there be one punishment for everything, that punishment being death? What is the point? To hard-code the idea of never, ever breaking a law into the people? But no matter how law-abiding a society is, people will always break little laws. How many of us have crossed against the traffic light? Smoked in a non-smoking zone? Hopped on a bus without a ticket? Downloaded illegal mat… you know what, let’s just gloss over that one. But the fact remains: nobody is totally and 100% lawful all the time. And for the slightest slip, you get death? Sounds more like a society living in fear to me.

"Didn't I blow you out of my ass a few episodes ago?"

Fair play to Yar! All that time in Starfleet Academy, she sure can recognise a syringe when she sees one! It’s hilarious how these mediators are completely taken aback by the fact that anyone would stand up to them. Total wimps. Very annoying Wesley’s up-himself announcement “I’m with Starfleet. We don’t lie.” That is, of course, a lie. Starfleet lie when it suits them, and if they think they’re some sort of Supermen, well, nobody need be any the wiser unless they want to be surveying planets out on the Galactic Rim for the rest of their career, right? When Liator says “God is somewhere out there” I keep expecting Linda Ronstadt to start singing, and images of a cartoon mouse to scroll across the screen. When Rivan asks why they don’t just take Wesley back with all their superior firepower (well, the Edo have none unless you count those huge bazungas um, never mind) you can see Beverly going hell yeah, why don’t you? This is my boy (possibly YOUR boy!) and if you ever want to get within a light year of my action again you’ll go in there guns blazing and rescue my kid, or I’ll know the reason why!


"Oh, typical man! A blonde cutie shows up and you forget all about me!"

“God” seems pretty pissed off about Picard half-inching his “child”. A case of “she’s my bird, wanna fight about it?” Picard gives in like the nerd he is. Hell, plenty more blondes in the galaxy, right? Certainly a case here of the needs of the many outweighing the needs of the one, though Picard doesn’t see it that way. Funny when Beverly says “Then your god is unfair!” I mean, what god worries about being fair? That’s for mortals. You can see though, after having to endure Picard’s speech and then listen to Riker add his little bit of sidekick “Yeah” the God-thing surely goes “Oh hell with this. If I have to listen to one more platitude… I’m going for a lie down.” Don’t blame it.

To give it credit, this is the first TNG episode where Picard really steps up; he tries his best to satisfy the Prime Directive, the guiding principle behind his entire career, but when it comes down to a choice between following Starfleet rules and saving a member of his crew (even if it is only Wesley) - and possibly, more importantly, showing Beverly what a man he is and how he’ll protect her (his?) kid, he’s ready to throw the rule book out the window. It is quite likely that when he makes his report the brass back home will say “yeah I think he was right to do that. Fuck those promiscuous sexpots and their orbiting god - hold on here: sex at the drop of a what? Hmm. Where does it say that planet was?” Then again, it they re-read it and see it was only Wesley, maybe they’ll change their mind and think he should have let him get the death jab.

Overall though, a pretty powerful episode which very easily and effectively swings from nudge-nudge fluff to deadly serious without seeming too abrupt a change. I would have to say, in retrospect, one of the better ones of the early first season. I see nobody, including Wil Wheaton, agree with me. And so I say, fuck all of them.

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Trollheart

An interesting one this time: despite some gains in terms of points, they all seem to balance out and literally nobody moves. Everyone remains where they were. For those wondering how Picard managed a 0 when he definitely was in the episode, it's just that the things he did that went against what would be considered Starfleet protocol, weighed against the good he did, cancelled each other out. If anyone really wants the figures I can post them, but basically things like acting against Starfleet protocols, putting his feelings before his duty, bad command decision and so on just left him with a net zero score.

Here's the chart, for what it's worth.

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Trollheart

Episode title: “The Battle”
Season: 1
Basic plot: The Enterprise is attacked by a Ferengi commander on a mission of revenge
Importance: 3 (first combat with Ferengi, first mention of the USS Stargazer and first look into Picard’s past)
Crisis point(s) if any: Picard almost fires on his own vessel and tries to use the Picard Manoeuvre to destroy the Enterprise.
Original transmission date: November 16 1987
Writer(s): Lary Forrester (teleplay by Herbert Wright)
Director: Rob Bowman
Stardate:* 41723.9
Destination: Zendi Sabu star system
Mission (if any): Respond to request from Ferengi starship for a meeting
Main character(s) in Plot: Picard
Main character(s) in Subplot (if any):
Not appearing:
Villain/Monster (if any): Damon Bok
Deaths: 0
Lives saved (episode): 1
Lives saved (cumulative): 5
Locations:

Shipboard:
Captain’s quarters
Sickbay
Bridge
Space:

Other:


Ships/vessels: 2 (Ferengi ship, USS Stargazer)
Space battles: 1
Bodycount

Historical
0
Incidental
0
Direct
0
Total: 0
Running total: 84

Make it so: 0
Engage! 1
Combat factor: 10
Planets visited:
Planets mentioned:
Mysteries: Picard’s deteriorating health
Patients in sickbay: 1 (Picard)
Data v Humanity: Data works out a defence against the Picard manoeuvre, allowing the Enterprise to capture the Stargazer.
Data 3 - Humanity 3
Character scores:
Picard 90
Riker 40
Troi 10
Bev 15
Geordi 15
Data 55
Worf 15
Wesley 10
Yar 15
O’Brien 0

Earl Grey: 0
Shuttlecraft: 0
Admirals: 0
Starbases: Zendi Starbase 9
First contact: 0
Humour: 0
Episode rating: 4/10
Episode score: 170

This would then be the first solo Picard adventure, as such. It concerns the captain’s past, and brings in the Ferengi as more the aliens we came to know - two of the three are scandalised by Damon Bok’s offer of the Stargazer to Picard for free (!) but they do not know he has an ulterior motive. We also learn that in the 24th century common ailments such as the cold and headaches have been cured, and the brain has been mapped (apparently) so that pain is better understood. We also get more Wesley, unfortunately, as he messes around with the long-range scanners, trying to make them more efficient, and sadly does not disappear in a blue flash. We see the transporter the Ferengi use, and it is slightly different to that used by Starfleet. In “The Last Outpost” we didn’t see them beaming down, now we do, and their transporter beam sort of corkscrews in, warping them as they arrive.


Generally speaking, Starfleet frowns on conga lines, but in the interest of inter-species relations...


Sort of sweet the way Beverly puts Picard to bed. I like the way he’s shown to be just a mere mortal here, questioning his own actions, his own past, wondering if by some chance he could have done what his own log entry says he did? It’s an intensely personal story, though in some ways it mirrors the TOS episode “Balance of Terror”. First time ever - and I think, only time - that Beverly calls Riker “number one”. And what is it with the Stargazer? Is it the Fisher Price guide to Starfleet operations? Can’t recognise the helm unless it’s labelled as such? Riker to Data: “What’s the defence against the Picard manoeuvre?” Data: “There is none.” Riker: “Then devise one, quick!” Data: “Sure. What’ll I do with me other hand?” Also, Riker to Picard: “It’s RIker sir! You’re number one!” Picard: “Well, yes, I know I’m number one, Riker. Thank you, whoever you are.”


"I've changed my mind! Don't bother drawing in hair: it hurts too much!"



Funny how the Ferengi arrest Bok not for engaging in an unauthorised attack against a Starfleet ship, but for an unprofitable venture! A cardinal sin among the Ferengi.

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Trollheart

Slight issue: Open Office Calc had a major nervous breakdown and I lost my spreadsheet. I've since reconstructed it, but have decided to dump the "previous score" column, as it is only confusing me when I add up. I've now redone it on Google Sheets, so it may look a little different, but it is essentially the same.

After the last episode you can see there hasn't been much movement, other than for Picard, not surprisingly, who, like Kah'less coming back from the dead, rises from number 8 and rather ungentlemanly bumps Beverly down to 6. This has a slight domino effect, pushing Geordi to 7 and Deanna to 8, both of them dropping one place. Everyone else remains as they are.

For the sixth episode then, Yar remains at the top. Riker spends a third episode at number 2 (hey! Thought he was Number One?) and Wesley clings on to third spot while Data remains at four. Picard now moves into the top five, but other than that everyone more or less stays where they are or exchanges places, with the bottom half of the chart exactly as it was from nine to eleven.

Ah, but look at what's next up!

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Trollheart

"He's baa-aaack!"

Episode title: “Hide and Q”
Season: 1
Importance: 7 (reintroduces Q and gives Riker the chance to be one; starts a kind of weird relationship, a sort of respect Q has for Riker, almost, but not quite, friendship)
Crisis point(s) if any: Riker becomes a god. Still doesn't get him a raise though.
Original transmission date: November 23 1987
Writer(s): C.J. Holland, Gene Roddenberry
Director: Cliff Bole
Stardate:* 41590.5
Destination: Sigma 3 Colony
Mission (if any): Rescue after mine explosion
Main character(s) in Plot: Riker, Q
Main character(s) in Subplot (if any):
Not appearing: Troi
Villain/Monster (if any): Q
Deaths: 1
Lives saved (episode): 2
Lives saved (cumulative): 7
Locations:

Shipboard:
Bridge

Space:

Other:
Unknown planet


Ships/vessels: 0
Space battles: 0
Bodycount

Historical
0
Incidental
1 (Child on Quadra Sigma 3; though I’m sure there are plenty more casualties, this is the only one we see or which is remarked upon)
Direct
0
Total: 1
Running total: 85

Make it so: 0
Engage! 1
Combat factor: 0
Planets visited: 2 (Quadra Sigma 3, unknown Q planet)
Planets mentioned:
Mysteries: None
Patients in sickbay: 0
Data v humanity: n/a
Data 3 - Humanity 3
Character scores:
Picard 10
Riker 265
Troi 0
Bev 15
Geordi 15
Data 15
Worf 10
Wesley 10
Yar 10
O’Brien 0
Q 25

Earl Grey: 0
Shuttlecraft: 0
Admirals: 1 (Technically, Q appears as an admiral)
Starbases: 0
First contact:
Humour: 0
Episode rating: 5/10
Episode score: 270

I love the pace of this episode, the way it totally wrong-foots you. Opening as an urgent rescue mission, it quickly takes a hard left into a Q episode (and all the better for it), where this time Q is presented not quite as the omnipotent godlike being he was in the pilot episode, and more as a kind of trickster figure. Never got the title though: Q episodes from here on in make sense - “True Q”, “Q-less”, “Q Who” etc - but “Hide and Q” is obviously “Hide and Seek”, and the word seek has nothing to do with Q. Then again, there’s a Voyager episode called “The Q and the Gray”, so maybe it doesn’t matter. This is the first - maybe only - episode in which Deanna does not take part, as it mentions at the beginning they have dropped her off for a visit to her mother. That’s also the first mention of her mother, who, sadly, we will have more dealings with. It’s also the point where the Q as a race seem to become less dismissive of, and more interested in humanity, though we are given later the general impression that it is only this Q that is obsessed with them.

Picard wonders if perhaps Starfleet are going a little too far with the cutbacks?

Although I never liked her, it is interesting to see Tasha Yar emotional, breaking down when she realises that she may die if someone else makes a slip-up down on the planet, and Picard eschews his usual gruff attitude and distance to comfort her. It’s a nice snapshot of a captain putting off the rank and protocol for once and just acting as one human being to another. Q seems to be rattled for once when Picard says he sees his own race becoming as powerful as them - like gods - one day, and it would appear Q agrees that this is a possibility. Is it, then, fear, or jealousy that drives his contact with and interest in us? Can it even be a sense of insecurity? This is also the first we hear of the Q Continuum, or even that Q is not a single entity, but is part of a larger community of godlike beings.

"Don't take it personally, Tasha. Geordi knows a hunk when he sees one. On the bright side, you'll be dead soon."

I can understand Picard’s agreeing that Riker should not have used his new Q powers to try to bring the little girl back to life on Quada Sigma 3 - after all, he’s no lover of children. Sod the little brat: let her stay dead. Picard is however canny here; he realises that once Riker uses his powers and sees what will happen, he will see that this is not the gift Q says it is. Data’s response is a little reminiscent of Kirk in Star Trek V: “NO! Don’t take my pain! I NEED my pain!” Geordi’s reaction to Tasha: “You’re more beautiful than I even imagined!” Picard: “Sorry, that’s me you’re looking at, La Forge.” Geordi: “I know.” Heh heh.

There are elements of the TOS episode “The Squire of Gothos” here, not only in the military campaign thing, but in the ending too, where Q is seen to be under the control of other, perhaps older (if age means anything in the Q Continuum) beings to whom he must report. His anguish at being called or pulled back reflects the chagrin, even fear of both Squire Trelayne and Charlie X (the one being a virtual copy of the other) when they were returned to their origin. After a Picard-specific episode, this is the first real Riker-led one, and also has shades of “Where No Man Has Gone Before” in the conferring of godlike powers on one of the crew, so really not that original, but it’s the magnetic presence of John de Lancie as Q that pulls the whole thing together and makes it very markedly a TNG and not a TOS episode. It’s also nice to see Wesley die, even if it doesn’t last.

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Trollheart

Well, the big news is that Yar is down from the number one spot, having been basically hurled off the top by Riker with as much ferocity as Kirk kicking that Klingon captain off the crumbling cliff of the destructing Genesis planet in Star Trek III! Riker becomes the first character not only to smash the 400-point barrier but the 500 one too, and comes within a breath of racking up 600!

Perhaps surprsingly, or perhaps not, Q doesn't earn many points even in an episode which ostensibly revolves around him. The explanation is that it doesn't, not really. Q is there as the agency of Riker's rise to Q-hood/godhood, but really, when you think about it, he doesn't do very much. This episode is all about Riker, and that's why he finally makes it to the top. Everyone else remains where they are, pretty much for the same reason. Will Yar make it back to number one before she has a fatal encounter with Armus? I don't know but I would doubt it. Look at the gap now: we're talking a full 200 points, though on the other hand she does have most of the season to make that defecit up. My money would be on Riker though.

Incidentally, I did consider awarding a "final score" for any character killed, which would, at the end of season one, have given Yar a clear advantage for a long time, but there was no point. She's the only one who dies - sure, Worf does, but they bring him back to life, and Wesley here, and sort of Picard in "Tapestry", and Data gets buried but he's not really dead, and so on. But someone actually dying and leaving the show (shut up! I KNOW about "Yesterday's Enterprise"! What do you want me to do about alternate timelines? I've enough to be dealing with here, thanks)? Just her. So there's little to no point in making a special farewell score.

We'll see, then, how she gets on, but you'd have to imagine once he has his arse on that top chair, it's gonna be harder to move Will from it than it would be to get Picard to break the Prime Directive and maybe smile.

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