Isbjørn

So I decided to make a journal. That way I can write whatever I want to, when I want to. I might review some crap, I might not, we'll see. Maybe I'll take requests, too.



Anyway...

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Trollheart

Always glad to see a new journal spring up, specially in these lean times! Though I think The Batlord might have a problem with RJD being on a journal entitled "The Poseur Cave"!

Welcome! I look forward to hearing your thoughts.

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Trollheart: Signature-free since April 2018

Isbjørn

Some of you cool people may have noticed that I changed my profile picture to a tarantula. Why? Well, I was just browsing my Facebook wall with nothing better to do, and BOOM! Suddenly, a blue tarantula! And it was called a poecilotheria metallica. Metallica fans might get something more out of it, but dude. It's got "metallica" in its name, and everyone should be able to appreciate that. Oh, did I mention it's blue?

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Dr_Rez

Not gonna lie I want this to succeed and you seem cool but I really hate spiders and dont think I will be coming back if picture of the things are everywhere.

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*Best chance of losing virginity is in prison crew*
*Always Checks Credentials Crew*
*nba > nfl crew*
*Shave one of my legs to pretend its a girl in my bed crew*

Isbjørn

Don't worry. The Poseur Cave is poseur friendly and will not contain many more spiders.

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Isbjørn

You know what that is? That's the Keeper of the Seven Keys Parts I & II Deluxe Expanded Edition. Awesome. Bought it yesterday, just in time for halloween. Haven't got time to listen to it yet, but my expectations are very high. I'm actually scared to listen to it, due to what is called the goatpenis phenomena. What I want to b*tch about is the cover art. I'd be fine with it if they had included the originals in the booklet or on the inside of the cover, but no. Also, the booklet has no lyrics. That makes me a sad poseur.

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Unknown Soldier

Some of the best power metal albums ever recorded, especially pt.2

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Metal Wars

Power Metal

Pounding Decibels- A Hard and Heavy History

The Batlord

Yeah, unlike Goatpenis (I assume) Helloween will not disappoint you. Those two albums are fantastic.

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Isbjørn

Paranoid vs Master of Reality

The big question in metal's now 43 year old history is “what is the finest album by Black Sabbath, the band who started it all?” I thought “hey, that's a perfect entry for the Poseur Cave journal”, and decided to bitch about it. Now, I must confess to only having heard these two albums, and merely bits of the others. That's cool though, since these two seem to be everyone's favourites, and therefore the ones most suitable for comparison.


Here goes...

They both have eight tracks, and that's perfect, because then I can do a side-by-side-ish comparison, starting at...


Track 1
“Boom!” goes the guitar in War Pigs opening riff, the start of an amazing song, one of the best on the album IMO. It's counterpart, Sweet Leaf is dedicated to marijuana. Well, it was 1971, what can you expect? Paranoid wins this one. Clearly.

Track 2
I'm not saying Paranoid is a bad song, but I do think it's a bad follow-up to War Pigs. It's pretty dull in comparison. Master of Reality wins this one just by keeping on track.

Track 3
Planet Caravan, and now we can't even see the track (you know, the one they went off) anymore. This would fit on a Pink Floyd album or something. Embryo is not much better, but I view it as an introduction of sorts to the next track, they're even merged together on the Live at Last album. Anyway, it's a tie, since none of the tracks fit in particularly well.

Track 4
Hard one. These are maybe the best tracks from each album (alright, War Pigs and Fairies Wear Boots are great competition). I choose Children of the Grave, it's my favourite Black Sabbath song and very powerful.

Track 5
I really want to give Orchid this one, but it's counterpart is Electric Funeral. Electric Funeral is so doomy it'd kill any flower, orchids included. Orchid could easily win against many other tracks, but it's not metal, for those who care.

Track 6
A standout track versus a not-so-outstanding track? Hmm, yeah. Lord of this World, definitely. Heavy and bluesy. Me like.

Track 7
Here's that space rock thing again. And an instrumental, but that's fine, because it wins. It's pretty cool, despite having no vocals. That drum solo or whatever it is really shouldn't be there, though.

Track 8
Oh. Uuuhm, yeah. Hard one. Fairies Wear Boots is one of my favourites, and so is Into the Void, yet the drug-trip thing can't beat the thick doom thing. That means Into the Void wins.


Paranoid gets three points, Master of Reality gets four. That means the latter wins, but only just (though it should get bonus points for the album cover).

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The Batlord

That's my big problem with Paranoid. It's a great album, but the song flow on the A-Side is terrible. Why would you follow such a heavy track on such a monumentally heavy album with a great, but still normal, not-at-all heavy rocker, and then further the not-at-all heaviness with "Planet Caravan"? They should have followed "War Pigs" with "Iron Man" to give you a one-two knock-out punch of monumental heaviness. Then put on "Paranoid" to change things up, and stick "Planet Caravan" near the end of the B-Side.

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