The Poseur Cave

The Batlord · 12-05-2014, 05:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Unknown Soldier

Imagine the impact this must've made in 1969.

I imagine it probably did make an impact with the five people who heard it.

Isbjørn · 12-07-2014, 08:40 AM

It's (the 7th of) December.

So...

It's totally acceptable to listen to Mariah Carey now
Your chocolate addiction is justified
There will be clementine peel everywhere
You can finally get that Santa hat out of the attic
If you're a hipster, you can dye your beard white in order to appeal to hipsters AND children
You will have a WHAM! song stuck in your head soon
You'll wish you had less friends when shopping for presents
You should probably practice your "thank you"s
Your Batlord-disapproved sweater percentage will rise dramatically in 18 days

Isbjørn · 12-10-2014, 09:52 AM

Haiku reviews

Taake - Kulde (EP)

What, a Cure cover
On a black metal EP?
I find that funny

3.5/5

The Rolling Stones - Sticky Fingers

Not much I can say
These guys just know how to rock
Y'know, they're the Stones

4/5

Brian - Understand

It's a sweet, little
Jangly twee pop album
That should be longer

4/5

Andrew Jackson Jihad - People Who Can Eat People Are the Luckiest People in the World

Well, that's a title
Anyway, this is great stuff
Though it's immature

4/5

Isbjørn · 12-12-2014, 08:19 AM

Artist: Sonata Arctica
Album: Silence
Year: 2001
Genre: Power metal

This isn't a review. This is a warning. I'll be brief: do not bother listening to this album. It's just every power metal stereotype mushed into an uninspired mix. Keyboard solos, predictable melodies, soaring vocals et cetera, but nothing new whatsoever. I'd mention standout tracks, but I kind of stopped paying attention early on, and every song pretty much sounds the same. And have a look at this:

"I see you walking hand in hand with long-haired drummer of the band
In love with her or so it seems, he's dancing with my beauty queen
Don't even dare to say you hi, still swallowing the goodbye
But I know the feelings still alive... still alive"

Power metal is cool when done right. Helloween, Blind Guardian and Hammerfall are good bands. But even though this can be found on "greatest power metal albums" lists, it's easily forgettable.

2/5

Isbjørn · 12-18-2014, 08:22 AM

Briks' exploration of folk music

Artist: Simon and Garfunkel
Album: Sounds of Silence
Year: 1966
Genre: Folk pop

Alright, this is one I've known and loved for some time. It used to be on regular rotation in my family's car (until the disc disappeared, poof). And of course I love it. How can one not dig the beautiful vocal harmonies on "The Sound of Silence"? Or the exquisitely fingerpicked guitar on "Kathy's Song"? Or the rockier moments, such as "We've Got a Groove Thing Goin'" or "I Am a Rock"? The lyrics aren't half bad either. "Richard Cory" is about a man who covets his employer's wealth, even though he commits suicide. The man would rather be suicidal, or even dead, than poverty-stricken. The topic of suicide is also covered on the song "A Most Peculiar Man", about a person who is being judged by those around him for being shy, which in turn makes him seclude himself further. He kills himself, but even then, people don't stop their judgement:

"And all the people said, "What a shame that he's dead,
But wasn't he a most peculiar man?"

Apparently, the man is peculiar, and there's no way around it. I don't think there's anything I don't like about this album. The status as a classic is deserved.

4.5/5

Isbjørn · 12-19-2014, 04:32 AM

More haiku reviews

Sunny Day Real Estate - S/T

A good follow-up
Not as good as Diary
But let us be fair

4/5

Rammstein - Herzeleid

This is best if you
Don't take it seriously
Look at the cover

4/5

The Jimi Hendrix Experience - Are You Experienced

Jimi shreds that axe
A little overrated
But still a classic

3.5/5

Isbjørn · 12-20-2014, 08:15 AM

Artist: Wishbone Ash
Album: Argus
Year: 1972
Genre: Progressive rock/hard rock

I've been meaning to listen to this for a long time. I was browsing Iron Maiden's Wikipedia page, and on a list of influences, this album was mentioned. According to Steve Harris, Maiden's trademark twin guitar style was inspired by this album, so of course I had to check it out.

The word "progressive", when used as part of a genre name, tends to make me a little sceptical, as most progressive metal albums I've listened to didn't manage to grab my interest, and progressive rock seems to be hit or miss as well (though not to the same degree). This was a hit, though. There is no filler, but the jangly pop rock song "Blowin' Free" is a standout. The double Byrds-y guitars and harmonized vocals really appeal to me. "Warrior" is great as well. It captures that going-out-to-war feel that few non-metal songs (that I know, anyway) do. I'm pretty sure all of you have listened to this already, but if you haven't, you should.

4/5

Unknown Soldier · 12-20-2014, 11:17 AM

Argus is one of my all time favourite albums

Isbjørn · 12-21-2014, 02:33 AM

Artist: Dragon Guardian
Album: Dragonvarius
Year: 2009
Genre: Power/symphonic metal

Ladies and gentlemen, do you know what this is? It's ridiculous. The band is named Dragon Guardian (I guess they like Blind Guardian and Dragonforce?) and the album is named Dragonvarius (they must like Stratovarius too!). Those names aren't cheesy, they're just plain bad. And look at the album cover. It looks as if it's taken from some tacky, anime-styled online role-playing game, whose nerdy players make up this band's entire fanbase, I imagine. I'm not going to go in-depth about the music: it's average euro-styled power metal with Japanese lyrics and obnoxious spoken passages. The only reason I listened to this was to bash the band's name in my journal. Dragon Guardian is a ****ty name.

2/5

The Batlord · 12-21-2014, 01:53 PM

Oh god. Kill it before a non-power metal fan gets wind of it. Janszoon would never let us hear the end of this.

12-07-2014, 08:40 AM	#2 (permalink)
Isbjørn cooler commie than elph Join Date: Sep 2012 Location: In a hole, help Posts: 2,811	It's (the 7th of) December. So... It's totally acceptable to listen to Mariah Carey now Your chocolate addiction is justified There will be clementine peel everywhere You can finally get that Santa hat out of the attic If you're a hipster, you can dye your beard white in order to appeal to hipsters AND children You will have a WHAM! song stuck in your head soon You'll wish you had less friends when shopping for presents You should probably practice your "thank you"s Your Batlord-disapproved sweater percentage will rise dramatically in 18 days __________________ fast(ml) Hear me play the guitar Look, mom! I got a journal

12-10-2014, 09:52 AM	#3 (permalink)
Isbjørn cooler commie than elph Join Date: Sep 2012 Location: In a hole, help Posts: 2,811	Haiku reviews Taake - Kulde (EP) What, a Cure cover On a black metal EP? I find that funny 3.5/5 The Rolling Stones - Sticky Fingers Not much I can say These guys just know how to rock Y'know, they're the Stones 4/5 Brian - Understand It's a sweet, little Jangly twee pop album That should be longer 4/5 Andrew Jackson Jihad - People Who Can Eat People Are the Luckiest People in the World Well, that's a title Anyway, this is great stuff Though it's immature 4/5 __________________ fast(ml) Hear me play the guitar Look, mom! I got a journal

12-12-2014, 08:19 AM	#4 (permalink)
Isbjørn cooler commie than elph Join Date: Sep 2012 Location: In a hole, help Posts: 2,811	Artist: Sonata Arctica Album: Silence Year: 2001 Genre: Power metal This isn't a review. This is a warning. I'll be brief: do not bother listening to this album. It's just every power metal stereotype mushed into an uninspired mix. Keyboard solos, predictable melodies, soaring vocals et cetera, but nothing new whatsoever. I'd mention standout tracks, but I kind of stopped paying attention early on, and every song pretty much sounds the same. And have a look at this: "I see you walking hand in hand with long-haired drummer of the band In love with her or so it seems, he's dancing with my beauty queen Don't even dare to say you hi, still swallowing the goodbye But I know the feelings still alive... still alive" Power metal is cool when done right. Helloween, Blind Guardian and Hammerfall are good bands. But even though this can be found on "greatest power metal albums" lists, it's easily forgettable. 2/5 __________________ fast(ml) Hear me play the guitar Look, mom! I got a journal

12-18-2014, 08:22 AM	#5 (permalink)
Isbjørn cooler commie than elph Join Date: Sep 2012 Location: In a hole, help Posts: 2,811	Briks' exploration of folk music Artist: Simon and Garfunkel Album: Sounds of Silence Year: 1966 Genre: Folk pop Alright, this is one I've known and loved for some time. It used to be on regular rotation in my family's car (until the disc disappeared, poof). And of course I love it. How can one not dig the beautiful vocal harmonies on "The Sound of Silence"? Or the exquisitely fingerpicked guitar on "Kathy's Song"? Or the rockier moments, such as "We've Got a Groove Thing Goin'" or "I Am a Rock"? The lyrics aren't half bad either. "Richard Cory" is about a man who covets his employer's wealth, even though he commits suicide. The man would rather be suicidal, or even dead, than poverty-stricken. The topic of suicide is also covered on the song "A Most Peculiar Man", about a person who is being judged by those around him for being shy, which in turn makes him seclude himself further. He kills himself, but even then, people don't stop their judgement: "And all the people said, "What a shame that he's dead, But wasn't he a most peculiar man?" Apparently, the man is peculiar, and there's no way around it. I don't think there's anything I don't like about this album. The status as a classic is deserved. 4.5/5 __________________ fast(ml) Hear me play the guitar Look, mom! I got a journal

12-19-2014, 04:32 AM	#6 (permalink)
Isbjørn cooler commie than elph Join Date: Sep 2012 Location: In a hole, help Posts: 2,811	More haiku reviews Sunny Day Real Estate - S/T A good follow-up Not as good as Diary But let us be fair 4/5 Rammstein - Herzeleid This is best if you Don't take it seriously Look at the cover 4/5 The Jimi Hendrix Experience - Are You Experienced Jimi shreds that axe A little overrated But still a classic 3.5/5 __________________ fast(ml) Hear me play the guitar Look, mom! I got a journal

12-20-2014, 08:15 AM	#7 (permalink)
Isbjørn cooler commie than elph Join Date: Sep 2012 Location: In a hole, help Posts: 2,811	Artist: Wishbone Ash Album: Argus Year: 1972 Genre: Progressive rock/hard rock I've been meaning to listen to this for a long time. I was browsing Iron Maiden's Wikipedia page, and on a list of influences, this album was mentioned. According to Steve Harris, Maiden's trademark twin guitar style was inspired by this album, so of course I had to check it out. The word "progressive", when used as part of a genre name, tends to make me a little sceptical, as most progressive metal albums I've listened to didn't manage to grab my interest, and progressive rock seems to be hit or miss as well (though not to the same degree). This was a hit, though. There is no filler, but the jangly pop rock song "Blowin' Free" is a standout. The double Byrds-y guitars and harmonized vocals really appeal to me. "Warrior" is great as well. It captures that going-out-to-war feel that few non-metal songs (that I know, anyway) do. I'm pretty sure all of you have listened to this already, but if you haven't, you should. 4/5 __________________ fast(ml) Hear me play the guitar Look, mom! I got a journal

12-21-2014, 02:33 AM	#9 (permalink)
Isbjørn cooler commie than elph Join Date: Sep 2012 Location: In a hole, help Posts: 2,811	Artist: Dragon Guardian Album: Dragonvarius Year: 2009 Genre: Power/symphonic metal Ladies and gentlemen, do you know what this is? It's ridiculous. The band is named Dragon Guardian (I guess they like Blind Guardian and Dragonforce?) and the album is named Dragonvarius (they must like Stratovarius too!). Those names aren't cheesy, they're just plain bad. And look at the album cover. It looks as if it's taken from some tacky, anime-styled online role-playing game, whose nerdy players make up this band's entire fanbase, I imagine. I'm not going to go in-depth about the music: it's average euro-styled power metal with Japanese lyrics and obnoxious spoken passages. The only reason I listened to this was to bash the band's name in my journal. Dragon Guardian is a **ty name. 2/5** __________________ fast(ml) Hear me play the guitar Look, mom! I got a journal

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