The Poseur Cave

Isbjørn · 03-28-2014, 11:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Batlord

You should really check out Trouble. They're trad doom with Christian lyrics. Lyrically they're not my cup of tea, but I imagine that would be different for you. Fantastic band other than that though.

They're heavy/power metal, but while I'm on the subject of Christian metal bands you should also check out Warlord. I just recently became a rabid convert to these guys.

I don't really consider myself religious, so Christian lyrics aren't required. It's just that overly Satanic, gory, evil etc. lyrics aren't particularly welcome in my house. Lately I have started to get less and less offended by such lyrics, since they're mostly for shock value, but I still try to avoid artists who are involved in murders, rape, nazism and things like that. Anyway, if the bands you mentioned are any good, I'll check them out.

Isbjørn · 03-29-2014, 03:33 PM

I think googly eyes were a good investment.

Isbjørn · 03-31-2014, 08:06 AM

Briks listens to an entire Dragonforce album to see if it is a rewarding experience

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Batlord

Oh and to Briks, obviously you should make up your own mind, but listening to an entire Dragonforce album is probably not going to be a very rewarding experience. All the songs sound pretty much exactly the same: weedly weedly verse/chorus, weedly weedly verse/chorus, even more weedly weedly solo that lasts for at least two minutes (I've counted), and then weedly weedly verse/chorus. Granted, plenty of bands do this but Dragonforce make an art form out of putting as little variety as possible into their albums. Honestly there's probably about as much variety on one of their albums as on a death metal album.

Artist: Dragonforce
Album: Valley of the Damned
Year: 2003
Chronological position: Debut album
Genre: Power metal

Since Batty told me that I should make up my own mind, that's exactly what I'm going to do, and I'll do that by listening to an entire Dragonforce album. I chose Valley of the Damned, since it's their debut album and I like debut albums, they show the band at an early stage, before the members get sick of making music/sell out/change their style to the worse.

The first of October, 2012, I received a message from one of my friends, whose taste in music seems to develop in about the same direction as mine and with whom I started the metal album club. The message translates into something like this: Dude, if you want to hear someone who's sick at power metal, search on YouTube: 'Through the Fire and the Flames'. Watch it all, you'll be impressed. If I am to be completely honest with you, I was a bit impressed. The band played an insane speed, and it was very melodic, so I decided to check out some more of this then-new-to-me subgenre called “power metal”. I soon forgot about Dragonforce, before even bothering to hear an entire album of theirs. But no matter whether I'll hate them, love them, or think they're okay after listening to their debut, I'll have to credit them for introducing me to power metal and maybe even making me a fan of metal in general, just because of one song that I thought was “pretty cool”.

Halfway through:
Wow, the guitarwork on this album is amazing! These guys are brilliant songwriters, and all the lyrics up until now have been topnotch. The song “Starlight” is such a hard-hitting ballad, I feel that I can relate to it very much... like as if it's written just for me. I'm being sarcastic, of course. A thing I think is funny, though, is how much “Starlight” reminds me of “California King Bed” by Rihanna. Metal.

Finished:
I'm sorry for not listening to you, Batty. This was garbage. It's sad that something like this, an album made by mislead poseurs, can pass as power metal, a True Metal subgenre, when it really should be called “speedy nintendo mallcore”. The synth is gross, and there's way too much of it. The lyrics are repetitive and unoriginal. Half of the album length is made up of wanky chiptune solos. There is one good thing about that last bit, though: more solos mean less lyrics. This was 52 minutes wasted.

What I will do now:
Cleanse my mind with Nirvana and celebrate that I'm done with this.

Isbjørn · 04-01-2014, 12:27 PM

Chunks of metal: doom metal

Artist: Ghost
Album: Opus Eponymous
Year: 2010
Chronological position: Debut album
Genre: Hard rock/heavy metal
Expectations before listening: Epic doom, but softer and with more hooks than ordinary doom metal

I stated earlier that all my doom metal reviews would be in the doom section, but after listening, I don't really think this is doom. It says doom in the title, but that's only because that's what it was called when we selected it in the club. Anyway, what do I think of this praised-to-death, mystical, Swedish metal sensation called Ghost?

Well, I guess they're alright, but hardly more than that, in my opinion. Why? Well, their lyrics are nothing new; Satanic and occult themes have been there ever since God created Metal. They're not even doing it with style or originality, so instead of being offended, I'm just a little disappointed that they decided to jump on the Satanic bandwagon instead of getting a little more creative. Alright, their anonymity and stage performances are original, but their lyrics aren't. The song “Elizabeth” is fine, with its lyrics about Hungarian Countess Báthory rather than (*sigh*) Satan. The music isn't really outstanding either. The band members know how to play their instruments, but I think they could put some more soul into it. The drumming could need some variation, so could the solos, and even though the vocalist is talented, he should put some more power into his singing. He doesn't really fit as a metal vocalist in my opinion, but maybe as a pop vocalist. Conclusion? This is only half metal, and nothing to get all excited about, but if it came on the radio, I certainly wouldn't turn it off in disgust before regurgitating. Nice try.

2.5/5

Unknown Soldier · 04-01-2014, 02:35 PM

Why do some of your album reviews not have a rating? Have noticed one or two where you haven't done it.

Trollheart · 04-01-2014, 03:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Unknown Soldier

Why do some of your album reviews not have a rating? Have noticed one or two where you haven't done it.

Quiet, Ratings Boy!

Unknown Soldier · 04-01-2014, 04:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Briks

Sometimes I feel like writing a short conclusion at the end of the review instead of rating the album. Of course, I could do both, but I don't always feel like rating when I can express myself otherwise instead. Know what I'm saying?

Yes, but the numbers say it all especially with the style of your reviews.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trollheart

Quiet, Ratings Boy!

At least I do proper ratings when I use them, unlike some people on the site that are fond of giving out ratings like 3.8, 7.7 and 8.95 etc, yourself and Briks excluded here, but just saying

Trollheart · 04-01-2014, 04:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Unknown Soldier

Yes, but the numbers say it all especially with the style of your reviews.

At least I do proper ratings when I use them, unlike some people on the site that are fond of giving out ratings like 3.8, 7.7 and 8.95 etc, yourself and Briks excluded here, but just saying

Meh, I prefer things like guitars, skulls and, oh yeah, cookies!

Isbjørn · 04-01-2014, 02:48 PM

Sometimes I feel like writing a short conclusion at the end of the review instead of rating the album. Of course, I could do both, but I don't always feel like rating when I can express myself otherwise instead. Know what I'm saying?

The Batlord · 04-02-2014, 11:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Briks

Chunks of metal: doom metal

Artist: Ghost
Album: Opus Eponymous
Year: 2010
Chronological position: Debut album
Genre: Hard rock/heavy metal
Expectations before listening: Epic doom, but softer and with more hooks than ordinary doom metal

I stated earlier that all my doom metal reviews would be in the doom section, but after listening, I don't really think this is doom. It says doom in the title, but that's only because that's what it was called when we selected it in the club. Anyway, what do I think of this praised-to-death, mystical, Swedish metal sensation called Ghost?

Well, I guess they're alright, but hardly more than that, in my opinion. Why? Well, their lyrics are nothing new; Satanic and occult themes have been there ever since God created Metal. They're not even doing it with style or originality, so instead of being offended, I'm just a little disappointed that they decided to jump on the Satanic bandwagon instead of getting a little more creative. Alright, their anonymity and stage performances are original, but their lyrics aren't. The song “Elizabeth” is fine, with its lyrics about Hungarian Countess Báthory rather than (*sigh*) Satan. The music isn't really outstanding either. The band members know how to play their instruments, but I think they could put some more soul into it. The drumming could need some variation, so could the solos, and even though the vocalist is talented, he should put some more power into his singing. He doesn't really fit as a metal vocalist in my opinion, but maybe as a pop vocalist. Conclusion? This is only half metal, and nothing to get all excited about, but if it came on the radio, I certainly wouldn't turn it off in disgust before regurgitating. Nice try.

2.5/5

Agreed. I don't get the hype. So long as someone doesn't go back in time to the early eighties and assassinate King Diamond before he can form Mercyful Fate then Ghost will remain redundant.

P.S. I hear Dragonforce speed up their guitar work in the studio and can't actually play that stuff live. So they don't even get credit for that.

03-29-2014, 03:33 PM	#2 (permalink)
Isbjørn cooler commie than elph Join Date: Sep 2012 Location: In a hole, help Posts: 2,811	I think googly eyes were a good investment. __________________ fast(ml) Hear me play the guitar Look, mom! I got a journal Last edited by Isbjørn; 03-30-2014 at 05:45 AM.

04-01-2014, 12:27 PM	#4 (permalink)
Isbjørn cooler commie than elph Join Date: Sep 2012 Location: In a hole, help Posts: 2,811	Chunks of metal: doom metal Artist: Ghost Album: Opus Eponymous Year: 2010 Chronological position: Debut album Genre: Hard rock/heavy metal Expectations before listening: Epic doom, but softer and with more hooks than ordinary doom metal I stated earlier that all my doom metal reviews would be in the doom section, but after listening, I don't really think this is doom. It says doom in the title, but that's only because that's what it was called when we selected it in the club. Anyway, what do I think of this praised-to-death, mystical, Swedish metal sensation called Ghost? Well, I guess they're alright, but hardly more than that, in my opinion. Why? Well, their lyrics are nothing new; Satanic and occult themes have been there ever since God created Metal. They're not even doing it with style or originality, so instead of being offended, I'm just a little disappointed that they decided to jump on the Satanic bandwagon instead of getting a little more creative. Alright, their anonymity and stage performances are original, but their lyrics aren't. The song “Elizabeth” is fine, with its lyrics about Hungarian Countess Báthory rather than (sigh) Satan. The music isn't really outstanding either. The band members know how to play their instruments, but I think they could put some more soul into it. The drumming could need some variation, so could the solos, and even though the vocalist is talented, he should put some more power into his singing. He doesn't really fit as a metal vocalist in my opinion, but maybe as a pop vocalist. Conclusion? This is only half metal, and nothing to get all excited about, but if it came on the radio, I certainly wouldn't turn it off in disgust before regurgitating. Nice try. 2.5/5 __________________ fast(ml) Hear me play the guitar Look, mom! I got a journal

04-01-2014, 02:48 PM	#9 (permalink)
Isbjørn cooler commie than elph Join Date: Sep 2012 Location: In a hole, help Posts: 2,811	Sometimes I feel like writing a short conclusion at the end of the review instead of rating the album. Of course, I could do both, but I don't always feel like rating when I can express myself otherwise instead. Know what I'm saying? __________________ fast(ml) Hear me play the guitar Look, mom! I got a journal