The Couch Potato: Trollheart's Televisual and Cinematic Emporium

Trollheart · 12-12-2013, 02:32 PM

Prancer (1989)

If this wasn’t a Christmas movie (barely) that would sound more like the title of some film about a gay man who risks everything to become a ballet star. Or something. But it is a Christmas move (barely) and it is about the reindeer (sort of) who has a bit part in that song, as explained by IMDB, who are at this point I think getting tired of our copying-and-pasting their hard-thought-out plot summaries. fuck ‘em: it’s Christmas, or will be soon. Season of goodwill, so they had better just accept it or we’ll kick their heads in.

Jessica, the daughter of an impoverished farmer, still believes in Santa Claus. So when she comes across a reindeer with an injured leg, it makes perfect sense to her to assume that it is Prancer, who had fallen from a Christmas display in town. She hides him in her barn and feeds him cookies, until she can return him to Santa. Her father finds him and decides to sell him to the butcher, not for venison chops, but as an advertising display.

Heartwarming. eh? Why doesn’t she think it’s Rudolph? After all, he’s the most famous reindeer of all, according to Bing Crosby and a hundred other crooners who remind us every Christmas about the exploits of the nasally-challenged one. ot evah hcum Why not Dancer? Comet? Vixen? Donner or Blitzen? Why choose the gayest reindeer of all? Cos she’s a girl? Cos it sounds good? Cos I don’t care? Well I don’t. Did anyone else?

Let’s see: Sam Elliott, kind of know him. Cloris Leachman? Isn’t she or wasn’t she Karla in “Cheers”? Yeah, that’s about it. Not even any funny characters. Plenty of “Boys”, and a Mr Wood is the best I can come up with. No, I agree, it’s not that funny. About as funny as the backers of this movie must have felt when it nosedived at the box office, assuming it ever got there. Oh look! With staggering lack of hindsight and an almost admirable determination, they made a sequel. In 2001. Right. Some people don’t know when to stop flogging a dead reindeer (sorry).

12-12-2013, 02:32 PM	#11 (permalink)
Trollheart Born to be mild Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: 404 Not Found Posts: 26,996	Prancer (1989) If this wasn’t a Christmas movie (barely) that would sound more like the title of some film about a gay man who risks everything to become a ballet star. Or something. But it is a Christmas move (barely) and it is about the reindeer (sort of) who has a bit part in that song, as explained by IMDB, who are at this point I think getting tired of our copying-and-pasting their hard-thought-out plot summaries. fuck ‘em: it’s Christmas, or will be soon. Season of goodwill, so they had better just accept it or we’ll kick their heads in. Jessica, the daughter of an impoverished farmer, still believes in Santa Claus. So when she comes across a reindeer with an injured leg, it makes perfect sense to her to assume that it is Prancer, who had fallen from a Christmas display in town. She hides him in her barn and feeds him cookies, until she can return him to Santa. Her father finds him and decides to sell him to the butcher, not for venison chops, but as an advertising display. Heartwarming. eh? Why doesn’t she think it’s Rudolph? After all, he’s the most famous reindeer of all, according to Bing Crosby and a hundred other crooners who remind us every Christmas about the exploits of the nasally-challenged one. ot evah hcum Why not Dancer? Comet? Vixen? Donner or Blitzen? Why choose the gayest reindeer of all? Cos she’s a girl? Cos it sounds good? Cos I don’t care? Well I don’t. Did anyone else? Let’s see: Sam Elliott, kind of know him. Cloris Leachman? Isn’t she or wasn’t she Karla in “Cheers”? Yeah, that’s about it. Not even any funny characters. Plenty of “Boys”, and a Mr Wood is the best I can come up with. No, I agree, it’s not that funny. About as funny as the backers of this movie must have felt when it nosedived at the box office, assuming it ever got there. Oh look! With staggering lack of hindsight and an almost admirable determination, they made a sequel. In 2001. Right. Some people don’t know when to stop flogging a dead reindeer (sorry). __________________ Trollheart: Signature-free since April 2018