Trollheart

Bit expensive for me. If you can hook me up with a free link for the ebook/Kindle versions, I won't say no.

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The Batlord

It's not hard, you twat. This is pretty much my go-to site.

Electronic library. Download books free. Finding books

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Trollheart

I wasn't enquiring about your cock, man. Thanks anyway. This should be a big help.

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The Batlord

I wasn't using it much cause there were legal issues that closed it down, but Libgen seems to be back up, and has an insane amount of books, from fiction to textbooks to comics. It's pretty much god and I'd suggest you bookmark it. It's so good America decided to go after it like Afghanistan, and apparently failed, like Afghanistan.

Library Genesis

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Trollheart

Okay, now that looks pretty damn cool.

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Trollheart

Can you believe it's been over two years since we checked in on the good doctor? Well, I suppose given that I was absent for most of 2016 it's really only one, but still: definitely time to make another appointment! These episodes will in fact finish season one, even if it is (ahem) somewhat later than I expected to be doing this.

1.21 “Travels with Martin"

Frasier is planning his vacation, a chance to be away from his father and his dog for a week. When he hears how well Roz and her mother are getting on though, he reconsiders and offers Martin the chance to go anywhere with him on holiday. Martin chooses to see America, which is fine with Frasier until he realises his father wants to see it from the window of a Winnebago, a kind of motor home popular in America. Frasier had envisioned staying in five-star hotels, now he will be crammed into a motor home and have to sleep there too. It's not the holiday he had envisioned. He tries to convince Niles to help him by coming along, but his brother is adamant he will not be joining them ... until he hears that Daphne is also going!

Martin has planned to see Mount Rushmore, but Frasier, inspired by Daphne's devil-may-care attitude and “fresh pair of knickers” speech (see below) decides to throw caution to the wind and just drive, and see where they end up.

They end up in Canada.

Which is not good news for Daphne, whose visa only allows her to be in the United States. Moving outside its borders is a violation of her stay and could get her deported. Frasier of course did not do this on purpose; he simply forgot - or was not even aware - about her restrictions. But as they try to re-enter the US, after being told by Martin to act normal, everyone is on edge and the border crossing guard becomes suspicious. To throw him off, Martin “admits” that it's Eddie who's the cause of their unease; that he is afraid the guard will think he is not native to the US . But he shows him a picture of the dog by the Space Needle, “accidentally” also displaying his badge, which gets him a pass when the guard realises he is talking to a retired cop.

The dry wit of Roz
Asked abut his vacation, Frasier tells Roz he is “planning to leave my father and Eddie to fend for themselves while I spend an obscene amount of money on myself.” When he then asks her what she's doing for her holiday, she replies “Oh I'm taking my mother to Ireland, to stay in the sod house where her mother was born.” Frasier archly responds “Why don't you just write the words “bad son” on my forehead?”

A moment later she qualifies: “Oh there is nothing wrong with pampering yourself! After all, you do work three hours a day!”

QUOTES
Frasier: “If dad and I get into a Winnebago only one of us is coming out alive! You've got to come with us!”
Niles: “Frasier, you're my brother, and that entitles you to my bone marrow and one of my kidneys. But this is an imposition!”

Frasier: “I remember a car trip we took when I was nine, from Seattle to Spokane. The only thing he said to me on the trip was 'I think we got a problem with your brother Frasier'!”

Niles: “I am not a Winnebago guy! Whenever I see one I look into the eyes of the driver, hoping to see something that would explain why in God's name anyone would do such a thing. All I ever see is a death stare looking out from under the brim of a hat made out of Miller Light cans!”

Daphne: “You've certainly got this holiday well planned out Mr. Crane! Whenever I take a holiday I just grab a fresh pair of knickers and see where the wind takes me!”

Frasier: “We are on the road less travelled! From now on, we dance to the rhythm of the road!”
(In other words, they're lost!)

Frasier (at the wheel, as they approach the border back into the USA): “They're waving us through! They're waving us through! They're pulling us over ... they're pulling us over...!”

Daphne: “It's too late to turn back. I say we make a run for it.”
Frasier: “Oh great idea! A high speed chase in an eight-ton motor home! That'll make an amusing anecdote for the Border Guard Newsletter!”

FAMILY

We learn in this episode that Martin when younger was always obsessed with covering a certain amount of ground a day when on holidays or road trips. His two children would be in the backseats with sick bags - well, a mayonnaise jar! - and as Niles describes it , two tiny hostages. He says that the fact that their father drove so fast meant they couldn't see anything discernible out of the window. “I was thirteen”, he moans, “before I realised cows weren't blurry!”

Martin confides to Frasier that he can't help it, but every time they're together he can't think of anything to say. It's not hard to understand why: they share no common interests. Martin is all about sports and the guys down at McGinty's, and the television, whereas Frasier is an opera buff who wouldn't be seen dead in a pub and has no real interest in television, preferring instead to read. There must be a sense of regret that Martin has so little in common with either of his sons, which is probably why he takes to Daphne so well, she being more as it were on his level. Of course this doesn't mean he doesn't love his sons, he just must wish they took after him a little more.

1.22 “Author! Author!”

Frasier is pressured into writing a book with Niles about sibling relationships. His publisher thinks that the insight they can gain from both being psychiatrists would make for a great book, and though Frasier is dubious at first he warms to the idea, realising that he can get much of the material from callers to his show. However, as with all siblings the rivalry gets in the way; Frasier and Niles dither over the construction of the book, leading to their sequestering themselves in a hotel for the weekend, with a deadline to meet.

This of course does not work, as the rivalries between the two, never far from the surface, bubble up and they end up having a fight when inspiration deserts them. In the end, they admit that there is no way they're ever going to work together, and abandon the idea for the book.

QUOTES
Niles/Frasier (Singing from their operetta): “For some boys go to college, but we think they're all wussies. Cos they get all the knowledge, and we get all the oopa-doompa-doompa-dommpita...”

Niles: “You know, we have to approach this book from a totally different angle to all our writings, dissertations, theses...”
Frasier: “Yes that's right: this has to be interesting!”

Frasier: “Niles? Is there a lightbulb over my head?”
Niles: “You have an idea?”
Frasier: “No, I'm asking you if there is an actual lightbulb over my head! Of course I have an idea!”

Niles: “So what you're suggesting is that we exploit your listeners for our own financial gain?”
Frasier: “In essence, yes. What do you think?”
Niles: “I think it's borderline sleazy. Let's go for it!”

Niles (on the radio): “Helooo Emerald City! What's doin', what's happenin'?”
Frasier (cutting off mike): “What the hell are you doing?”
Niles: “My radio persona. Every great radio personality has one.”
Frasier: “I don't.”
Niles: “My point exactly.”

Frasier: “Niles, I would shave my head for you.”
Niles: “A gesture that becomes less significant with each passing year.”

And isn't that....?
The editor who asks them to write the book, Sam Tanaka, is played by famous actor Mako.

Thanks for calling
Guest caller Laura is voiced by Christine Lahti, actress famed for her roles in Chicago Hope and Law and Order: SVU.

Cop Stories
Although he later admits to Daphne that he made up the story, Martin's tale of a partner he fell out with after a stakeout is something that could have happened. Having got on each other's nerves during the stakeout Gus, the alleged partner, requested a transfer and Martin was not sorry to see him go. Some months later Gus was stabbed in the line of duty and though Martin rushed to the hospital he was too late. Something eerily similar happens in a later season, showing that perhaps, although this story was concocted, Martin was drawing on personal experience. As he says to Daphne, “At least there's one good writer in this family!”

FAMILY
Niles and Frasier
Nowhere to date have we seen the rivalry between the two brothers displayed as well as when they lock themselves into a hotel for the weekend, trying to write their book, or at least the first few chapters, which Sam Tanaka, their editor, needs for Reader's Digest, which is interested in serialising it. The ideas of each - such as they are - are shot down and scorn is heaped upon one by the other, until eventually all the bottled up tension bursts to the surface like an erupting volcano and the two Crane boys go at it. Niles accuses Frasier of being first at everything - he became a psychiatrist first, got married first, had his own child first - and Frasier, reverting to childhood at the climax of the fight shouts “You stole my mommy!”

Of course, they have both by this point consumed most of the contents of the room's minibar, so there's some excuse for their childish behaviour, but it leads them to the irrevocable conclusion that they cannot work together at all. Mind you, this will be disproved in a later season when they help their father write a song. But on the face of it, two gigantic egos going head to head is not a good recipe for a planned collaboration.

I love, as I have said before, the way this show can reduce two fully grown men back to boys. When neither will make up with the other, Martin steps in, every inch the father, and ensures that they bury the hatchet. They even sulk and grumble like little boys.

1.23 “Frasier Crane's day off”

New Character!
We are introduced here to Gil Chesterton, restaurant critic and host of “Food Beat”, the show about food and drink on KACL. Chesterton is English, and exhibits all the signs of being a homosexual, though as will be pointed out in later seasons, he is in fact married.

Victim to the flu going around, Frasier awakes unable to go in to work, but is worried about his timeslot being stolen by the predatory Gil Chesterton, who has been sniffing around and is known for taking such action. After one day of having the radio station's food critic to cover for him, and Roz confirming that Chesterton is after his slot, Frasier reluctantly asks Niles to sit in. Although Niles struggles a little at first, and so Frasier thinks his slot is safe, he soon finds his feet and does really well. Feverish, Frasier begins to see plots forming, a plan to take his radio show from him. As his paranoia grows, his behaviour becomes even more erratic.

Eventually it reaches its peak as, pumped up on drugs, he goes down to the station to try to take back his show, much to the surprise and dismay of Niles. Locking himself in the booth he goes on air, makes something of a fool of himself and has to be taken away by security.

QUOTES
Frasier: “I'm sorry; when I told you to close your eyes and visualise yourself on a tropical island, I didn't realise you were calling on your carphone!”

Frasier (to Roz): “How would you like to have to work from midnight to 4AM? What would happen to your social life? Those are your peak hours!”

Daphen (to Frasier): “You can't be thinking of going to work! You're all pasty and clammy and pale!”
Martin: “And coming from an English person, that's bad!”

Niles: “Hello Daphne. Is he in pain?”
Daphne (after having taken a list of things that Frasier wants brought to him): “Not enough.”

Frasier: “Daphne, the day I give a fig about what you think will be the day England produces a great chef, a world class bottle of wine and a car with a decent electrical system!”

Roz (on phone): “Tony? It's Roz. Can you get security up here? Captain Kirk has got control of the bridge and he's gone insane!”

Martin: “Why'd you tell him it was a dream?”
Daphne: “No point telling him now. I'll wait till tomorrow, when he's good and lucid.”

Notable Scenes
Frasier is very much a comedy driven by witty clever dialogue and the old French farce idea, but occasionally there are some really brilliant visual scenes that just need to be noted. Here, Frasier imagines himself back at work, fit as a fiddle. He is over his flu and Gil and Niles are waving from outside the booth. He thanks them for filling in for him, hits the mike button ... and explodes!

Of course, it's all a dream but it's a very vivid depiction of his own drug and fever-induced paranoia, allied to his innate suspicious nature, that everyone is plotting against him and that they would go so far as to put a bomb in his radio booth.

Thanks for calling
A glut of guest callers this episode! First we have the late Mary Tyler Moore, who played Marjorie, the woman with the problem boss, then Tommy Hilfiger voiced Robert, the man a drugged-up Frasier cut off, while what must be the infamous Patty Hearst (credited as Patricia Hearst, and I can find no other famous woman of that name) is the voice behind Janice. Singers Steve and Eydie - Steve Lawrence and Eydie Gorme - play the couple Niles was trying to reunite, Howard and Lois, then there's Doonesbury creator Garry Trudeau as Louis, the man with the forgotten anniversary who Gil helped out and NFL Quarterback Steve Young as Blake, the man driving blind.

1.24 “My coffee with Niles”

It's been a year since Frasier moved to Seattle from Boston (appropriate, as this is the end of the first season) and Martin is getting antsy. He starts talking about moving out, finding his own place, which again is ironic, as he only moved in with Frasier in the first place because he kept falling and couldn't be left on his own. As Frasier and Niles discuss their lives Frasier suddenly asks Niles if he is in love with Daphne. Niles admits he can't get her out of his mind, but that he's not sure if he's in love with her. Anyway he has no plans to leave his wife, and an affair is out of the question.

Martin comes by after storming out angrily, and when pressed, reveals it was his birthday the previous week and the boys forgot it. To make up for their forgetfulness they promise to take him out to dinner that night. Yeah, that's it.

QUOTES
Niles (on phone): “Now just relax, Maris. Take a left, then a right, then another left ... okay.”
Frasier: “Maris got lost again?”
Niles: “Yes. She wandered into the kitchen. I had to talk her back to the living room.”

Niles: “I don't think she (Roz) likes me!”
Frasier: “Oh it's not a case of like or dislike Niles. She despises you.”
Niles: “Really? Why should I warrant such strong emotions? I barely acknowledge her presence!”
Frasier: “Think you may be on to something there Sherlock!”

The dry wit of Roz
Niles asks Roz what brings her to Cafe Nervosa and she replies “Well I've always wanted to fly a jet, and today they're offering free jet lessons, so I throught I'd stop by and take advantage of their offer.” When Niles looks at her blankly, uncertain if she is joking, she sighs. “I came here for coffee, why else?”

After her attempt at wooing the guy who she believed “could be the one” (again) has fallen through (again) Roz waxes poetic. “Why why why?” she moans. “You meet someone, you hope that maybe you can sit down for a coffee and it might lead to - oh I don't know: a life maybe? Then the trapdoor opens beneath you and you're right back in Roz's world!”

Notes:
Bit of a weak episode to end on I feel. Nothing at the radio station at all, not even the opening scene, so no guest callers. No guest stars either and really, quite short on laughs. Not a whole lot to write about in the end, and if this was a series in danger of cancellation after the first season I would not have considered this a vote for its continued survival. Of course, as we know it went on not only to run for a further nine seasons but to win Emmys and awards all over the place, and become one of America's best-loved comedies. But this episode was really a non-event. Nothing happened in it, and if anything I would have considered it a slow episode following a really good one, Frasier's “Family” following “The best of both worlds”, were this Star Trek. Very weak, very poor. A big disappointment.

Season's End
Final notes on the first season:
As I said in the introduction, I wasn't one of those who transitioned from Cheers to Frasier. I was not a fan of the series in the beginning, though I later watched it and enjoyed it retrospectively, though I had seen enough of it to know that if there was to be a spin-off series I might expect Sam, Diane, even Norm! But not Frasier. He came across to me, in the few episodes I had seen, as a sort of bit character, a supporting player, with not too much in the way of interest. I guess you could say Cheers' Cleveland Brown.

But confounding all my expectations, Frasier began well and pretty much continued in that vein. We got to see a new side of Dr. Frasier Crane, met his family and his friends, and saw him in a totally new arena, that of radio, which really opened up the possibilities. But one thing that ensured this show was a huge success was its supporting cast. Grammar carries the show certainly, but from Niles and his many many little idiosyncasies - his obsessive cleanliness, his allergies, his opera, to say nothing of Maris - to Martin's earthy ordinary joe-ness and Daphne's often kooky take on life, even Eddie the dog played his part. Without all these fine actors and actresses - and one dog - behind him, Frasier might not have been the success it turned out to be.

Rather surprisingly for a first season, there really is no episode here I can turn to and find fault with, or call weaker than others. Apart from, oddly, this last one which as I've noted above was really quite below par, kind of a coda to the season ending, a wrap party aftermath if you will. And yet even for all that, it had its moments, just not too many of them. I think it suffered slightly from not having any radio material in it.

But if we thought season one was good, there was some truly amazing stuff to come as the years went on. As is my habit, I'll be putting this series on hold for a while before launching into season two - a gesture, to paraphrase Niles in the previous episode, that gets less significant with each series I add. When I only had three or four series, closing out the season and not coming back to the series for a few months seemed a reasonable hiatus. Now, with so many series to look after, even when a series is in-season it seems it can be months indeed before I get back to it. So all I can tell you about Frasier is that you definitely won't hear anything more from the Crane family for a while.

Hope you've enjoyed the coverage so far, but for now we've come to the end of season one and it's time to call a temporary halt. As Frasier or Niles would no doubt say, we've come to the end of our session.

For now.

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Trollheart

After five seasons we thought we'd seen it all. 24 had become the series most likely to surprise, shock, dismay. Regular characters were polished off before our eyes, Jack developed a serious drug addiction, leading lady after leading lady fell, a president had been assassinated and even Jack himself was believed dead. What more could the show throw at us?

When season six opened, Jack was after terrorists who had planned to detonate a number of nuclear devices in America. Nothing, in 24 terms, terribly new about that, but whereas despite its gritty realism in storylines, where the good guys did not necessarily always have it their own way, we had become used to the unexpected in this series, nobody was prepared for what happened in episode four when Jack and his team, racing to stop one of the devices going off in Los Angeles ... fail.

As we all watched open-mouthed and I personally at any rate thought “How are they going to stop this?” they, well, didn't. The terrorist reaches over, pushes the detonator and a moment later there is a freeze-frame, white light and Jack, some sort distance away, sees to his horror the unmistakable mushroom cloud rise up over the centre of Valencia, California. Who woulda thought it?

Up till then, as I said, we had initially been amazed and stunned by the twists and unexpected occurrences in this show, but when Jack failed in his mission and the terrorists won (if only temporarily) I think we were all momentarily in a state of shock. Things like that didn't happen on TV, especially not American TV and especially not on the watch of what had by then surely become America's number one action hero.

Of course, the aftermath of the explosion was handled terribly, and the rest of the season quickly descended into farce, pushing the limits of credibility – even for 24 – to breaking point. Instead of the city being evacuated or quarantined, Jack is able to go into the heart of what is a nuclear blast site, no radiation gear or anything, and more or less continue as before. Nobody seems to be, or is shown to be anyway, suffering from radiation sickness, and in general (though it's a while since I saw it), if I recall correctly the explosion is treated “just” as a massive bomb going off, not a nuclear one.

For all that, and for all that the season was as a whole pretty poor, this one totally unexpected moments marks season six as, if nothing else, one of the most shocking and memorable in the entire franchise.

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The Batlord

Another first-rate TH graphic.

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Episode title: “Mr. Dingle the Strong”
Series: Classic
Year: 1961
Season: 2
Episode: 19
Written by: Rod Serling

Two men, a bookie and a better, are arguing in a bar. The one does not want to pay his debt, the other wishes to be paid. They involve the timid vacuum cleaner salesman, Luther Dingle, in their dispute, while enter stage left an alien. Well, either two aliens or one alien with two heads. And quite possibly two bodies. Or one shared one. Does it matter? Oh yeah: they're invisible. Of course they are. They're looking for a subject for experimentation, and they settle, unsurprisingly, on Dingle, shooting him with a ray that increases his strength by a factor of three hundred. The rest of the story takes a tired path through Dingle's rise to fame as the little guy who always gets pushed around becomes the world's strongest man, He is courted by news, TV representatives, boxing managers and carnival owners, all of whom want to sign him up, promising they can help him make big money. Before long he's displaying his amazing feats of strength to all and sundry, including ensuring to take revenge on the big better who beat him up earlier.

Then the aliens return, and decide that they're not happy with how Dingle is using his new powers. They remove the super-strength, just as Dingle tries to lift the entire building. What follows is a personal humiliation for Dingle as he realises that as unexpectedly as he gained his power he has lost it, and his public quickly melts away, convinced that it must have been a trick after all. As the aliens (who are revealed as being from Mars) take their leave they meet another set of creatures (kids with very unconvincing moustaches painted on) who tell them they are from Venus, and are also conducting experiments. They are invited to try their intelligence-enhancement ray on Dingle, and he suddenly becomes the most intelligent man on Earth. Sigh.

Decent quotes

I do like it when Serling describes Dingle as being a man who “missed even the caboose of life's gravy train”. Yeah. That's the only one.

Questions?

Callahan warns the better he has “five seconds to take back that innuendo”, the innuendo in question being “You're a cheating insult to every American bookie!” That's not an innuendo: an innuendo is something hinted at slyly, this is an outright insult.

Why is it that the barman warns Callahan against starting a fight, but when the better punches Dingle clear over the bar he does nothing?

When Dingle becomes most aware of his strength, and in opening the door of the pub wrenches it off its hinges, the barman's reply is a mild “Why you gotta wreck my door?” He doesn't even seem surprised at the guy's sudden strength!

Why do I hate this episode?

Because it's played entirely for laughs, and not very original ones at that. It's almost like a cartoon in ways. It tells us nothing. It's as if someone said to Serling, “We need a lighter episode for the less bright members of the public. Nothing too heavy, no deep messages, just a bit of fun.” And so we get this. I hate that Serling wrote it, so I can't even blame it on anyone else. And what's the point of it? The Twilight Zone nearly always had a message, a moral: what's the message here? Use your gifts wisely? Glory is fleeting? With great power comes great responsibility? I don't know. I don't see one. It's a pointless episode with a few cheap laughs and no resolution at the end. Terrible. It also contains far too much baseball and other sport references for my personal liking.

Saving graces?

None, sadly. I can't point to anything that saves this episode. The aliens are ludicrous, even given the limitations of the period, I question the fact that despite his fame apparently spreading far and wide there is no news crew, certainly no international interest present both when Dingle performs his amazing feats of strength at the pub where he gained his power (and where about eighty percent of the episode takes place) and nobody tries to challenge him, claiming that he is a fake. More, when his powers are taken away and he can no longer perform these miracles, everyone just assumes he was a charlatan. Didn't they see with their own eyes? How did they think he tricked them? Pathetic.

How I would have done it

I would have told the executives to fuck off and written a much better and deeper episode. Easy to say, I know, but by now surely Serling, with four Emmys to his tally, could do as he wanted? Well,. Maybe not. I read that the new network executive on the show was tough on it and wanted to reduce the number of episodes, slash the budget. So maybe it would not have been that easy. Still, you feel he could have written something better than this trash. I know I could.

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Quiet, you. You already commented on this when I first used it, or are you too drunk to remember?

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