The Batlord

` ` `But just as we were about to be consumed by the inferno, I felt the Light of True Metal flowing from Joey swell, and his eyes snapped open. Without hesitating he let loose his arrow and it streaked through the air as a bolt of pure Light, shooting straight for the wyvern.
` ` `When the shining arrow met the wall of falling flame, it passed through unharmed, dispersing the blaze into a cascading shower of glowing embers as it raced along the burning column. Before our very eyes, the bolt pierced through the jaws of the beast and we were blinded by an incandescent burst of pure Light, followed by the deafening crack of a powerful explosion that almost hurled us to the ground.
` ` `We had thrown our arms over our faces to protect our eyes from the Light, and after several seconds of standing, dazed, we lowered them and gazed up at the sky in wonder...

` ` `The wyvern was gone. In its place was a rain of ash and sparks that swirled and fell around us, coating the rocks like snow.

` ` `"I love the smell of burning wyvern in the morning," declared Joey, "It smells like...burning wyvern."

` ` `"Shut up, Joey." But this was said with tolerance rather than withering contempt.

` ` `"Who knew I had it in me?" he asked, as if he hadn't heard me.

` ` `"Dude, you might be the most annoying dipshit I've ever met, and sometimes you make me wanna wrap my fingers around your scrawny little chicken-neck and beat your head against a wall till your head cracks open like an egg."

` ` `"...But?"

` ` `"But what?"

` ` `"But you were gonna say something else?"

` ` `"No."

` ` `"Asshole."

` ` `Sigh.

` ` `"But you're still one of the Truest Metalheads alive. Happy?"

` ` `"I'm slightly less offended."

` ` `"Get bent."

` ` `"Alright, I'm a little bit more offended now."

` ` `"Dude, don't mess around and get half a peace sign."

` ` `"How 'bout we drop it? I rule, you love me, now why don't we find a way off this rock already?"

` ` `Looking around I couldn't see any particularly good way off the spire. "Looks like we're boned. I guess we're just gonna have to start climbing."

` ` `"Oh. Goody. Well, no time like the past I guess."

` ` `And so, we started walking toward the edge of the spire to begin the long climb down.

` ` `"You know," remarked Joey, "With all that fourth-wall shit-talking I was doing, and the whole almost-getting-burned-alive thing, I was starting to think I was about to get written out of the story."

` ` `With that, Joey tripped on a rock and fell face first into the ground.

` ` `"Ow! My tooth!"

` ` `Turning toward your computer screen, I lock onto your eyes with a burning stare and declare...

__________________