The Batlord

The Most Metal People In History

Some Baby Smoking a Cigarette

Just look at this fucking baby! If he's smoking as an infant, then just imagine how badass he will be when he's an adult. I might have to kill him while he's young, lest he challenge my hegemony as the most badass person on Earth. And I'll just bet that he's not looking at the camera because he's looking at two chicks mud wrestling to Slayer.

General George S. Patton

I'm sure that this won't surprise anybody, since George Patton is a well known kicker of asses and taker of names. During the Battle of Kasserine Pass it is said that when the American forces were about to be defeated, Patton dropped paratroopers behind German lines where they started a circle pit, bringing panic to the enemy and allowing the American army to retreat.

Sanada Yukimura (a.k.a. Sanada Nobushige)

If Steven Seagal and Arnold Schwarzenegger had a child, Sanada Yukimura would strangle him to death with his pubes. Dude fought overwhelming numbers against the Shogun, Tokugawa Ieyasu, and managed to win many battles, but when he was finally faced with defeat, and exhausted from putting his foot in and then removing said foot from his enemies' asses he told them, "I am Sanada Nobushige, no doubt an adversary quite worthy of you, but I am exhausted and can fight no longer. Go on, take my head as your trophy." Now, don't you feel like a pussy?

Iggy Pop

I'm sure even you foot lickers know of the sheer awesomeness of Iggy Pop, but if you're an ignoramus who's been living in a cave and talking to a ring for your whole life, then I shall educate you: dude invented the stage-dive just to explore the art of the concussion, he rolled around in broken glass on stage just because he had an itch that he couldn't scratch, and he once fought a moose because it stole his heroin. Alright, I made that last one up, but I'm sure he would if it came to that.

Jet Li

I would talk about Jet Li, but even descriptions of Jet Li move so fast that they become a blur to weaklings like you.

__________________