Mojo

What a load of crap this statement has turned out to be.

Conveying passion isn't easy, but there are many ways to do it. Sometimes people write extensively on a bands background, influences, history etc and even just the sheer extent to which they write, delving into the bands background, shows you how much passion they have for that artist. Informative writing is good. It can educate people on why they should like that band too, especially if what they write appeals to the interests of the reader.

What you do well, the way I see it, is you don't write this way as such, not extensively anyway. You are focused more on your own connections with music. You may still be hoping that other people will listen to the music you write about, but it doesn't seem the overriding factor in your decision to write here. It appears as if you are more focused on writing from your heart, and from that passion you have inside that you wish to share with other music lovers around here. I imagine you write just as much for yourself as you do your audience.

I like to read informative posts here, and I like to read your more standard review of a band or an album. Thing is though that while that is true, I can read that anywhere. I love to read something that enables to learn more about our users here, their background, their history, their personality, and most importantly the role music plays in their lives, the passion they have for it, and why they love what they love as much as they do.

You write about memories music brings back for you, whether they be happy or sad. You are sharing intimate parts of yourself with people who will hopefully want to read it and feel privileged to be afforded the opportunity to do so, and that you felt you could share some of these things with us. And to be honest with you, after reading through your entire journal, stories such as riding to meet your friends and discuss life and unload, feeling connected to your city and your surroundings, and especially your Antlers post, I feel you do this fantastically well.

So, I think my point, which I lost in there somewhere was - you're a liar.

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Last.FM | Echoes and Dust

WWWP

Thank you so much for this. This both made me tear up and grin until it hurt. Thanks for taking the time to read and respond, and thank you for affirming that what I'm doing isn't a waste of time. You made my day, friend.

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#DEMODFROWNLAND
#TERMLIMITSFORMODERATORS

Trollheart

Yeah, I think considering how much you're loved here there was a significant jump in your view count once people realised you were posting again. I'd certainly agree with Mojo that you connect more personally with your favourite music than others, perhaps I, do, but you do it really well and you need have no fear that your words are going unread: I can imagine a queue to find out what you have to say next --- no pushing or shoving please I said no pushing or shoving!

One of the undiscovered gems of the journal world. Keep it up!

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Trollheart: Signature-free since April 2018

Anteater

What a fantastic journal this is! Getting to revisit R. Stevie Moore and stuff I didn't know he was associated with was quite interesting in particular, but the world could also always use a bit more Yo La Tengo appreciation methinks. 'Lets Be Still' will probably always be my favorite song by them, but it's nice to see how well you've connected with them despite initially dismissing them long ago.

I'm very passionate about the music I've found myself connecting with over the years, and it's always great to run across others who do it even better than I do. I'll be following your writings wolf, so please keep on sharing for all our sakes.

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Anteater's 21 Fav Albums Of 2020

Anteater's Daily Tune Roulette

WWWP

So - disclaimer. Like an idiot I didn’t write down the initial list of my Top Artists over the last three months on last.fm so as I keep listening to music my list keeps changing. I can’t remember the order of things when I started at all, so I’m going to just keep moving down the list as if each of the artists were there the whole time.


7. Why?


Why? Is one of the notorious bands from the anticon scene, and frontman Yoni Wolf participates in a handful of other anticon bands, markedly cLOUDDEAD and Hymie’s Basement. Why?’s second, and in my opinion, best album, included contributions from additional anticon favorites Doseone and Odd Nosdam. My love for the anticon collective is similar to that for Elephant 6 – there are very rarely any releases that don’t impress me, and I love the idea of a large amount of my favorite artists all sharing space, being friends and collaborating and creating music that has meant so much to me. Alopecia, Why?’s second release, is another that has already received a fair amount of attention on the boards, so rather than talk about it as a whole I’m just going to word vomit all over you.

Am I an example of a calculated birth?
To a star chart for clowns?

My parents split up when I was young, and my dad won custody after a long, arduous, gruesome battle backed by his parent’s money and the support of the local LDS church branch (I am not joking). I grew up with my father and stepmother (a woman he was cheating on my mom with and then married three months later) and was systematically turned against my mom. I was told she left because she didn’t love me anymore, she would send birthday cards I would never see. I wasn’t allowed to talk her from the time I was 10 until I was 18. I moved out of my father’s house when I was 16, no longer able to look him in the face and no longer willing to give him the satisfaction of having me depend on him, not only as a parent but as a human being. I graduated high school in May of 2008 and after reconnecting with my mother via myspace a few months earlier I invited her to the ceremony. She accepted. She came to Wyoming after being gone for nearly a decade and we had an Oprah worthy reunion. At the commencement exercise my father made a scene in front of everyone in attendance, upset about the fact that I had invited her. He told me he hadn’t considered me his daughter for the past six years. I told him I wanted him out of my life. My mother invited me to come visit her where she lived in California and I did, and once I got here I realized I had nothing in Wyoming to go back to, so I stayed. I left everything behind and I didn’t tell anyone I was leaving.
But I was born for this flight/ United 955 on the fifth of July/ Back to SFO I join the dark side in a thin disguise caught on consumer grade video at night.
Alopecia came to me at one of my lowest points. I learned of Why? Through MB immediately after I had made this move away from my hometown unexpectedly.

I had ended up in California where I knew no one, knew nothing, wanted nothing, and wanted to do nothing. I had jumped a plane to San Francisco National Airport from Salt Lake City. I joined the dark side in that I joined the family that I had been so warned against for such crucial years of my upbringing – suddenly everything I thought I knew about my mother was turned upside down and I realized for how long my father had been lying to me, and I saw the lengths he went to keep me from my mom. My thin disguise was created in my attempt to hold myself together while I decided which parts of me I wanted to keep, which people I wanted to let in my life, who was safe and who was a threat.

A hollow bullet yet spent
Subject to dismissal

I sunk into a deep depression. After moving in with my mom I reverted back to a childhood state of dependence that had become unfamiliar to me by then – I allowed her to take care of me in the ways I had been craving since she left. I stayed home all day, doing nothing but eating and watching movies. I read all the books in her house, I questioned everything I believed. I went nowhere, I talked to no one. I began to develop a new philosophy on life, sparked by a constant series of existential crises. I abandoned the plans I had made with my best friend from back home in regards to moving away to Oregon to go to college together – I decided I wasn’t ready. I learned guitar and wrote poetry and immersed myself in MB, collecting and discussing music, making friends and discovering substantial things about myself in the process.

While I'm alive I'll feel alive
and what's next I guess I'll know when I've gotten there

I began to feel better about myself, having picked apart every aspect of how I knew what I knew, why I needed to know it, and what else I needed to know. The depression had not left, but its weight had decreased. I felt confident in the things I spoke of, I felt sure of myself in a way I hadn’t before. I got a job, moved out of my mom’s house and put together a life I could be proud of. I haven’t spoken to my father since.

The first complete song I wrote was about this experience and was in part inspired by the SFO line in the Vowels Pt. 2. I’ll share that now.



Lyrics:
I packed my bags two days after my high school graduation
Said goodbye to my hometown without much hesitation
Jumped a plane to SFO in my determination
And made my way through the North Bay with sense of liberation
My sister said I left due to lack of appreciation
Dad cried out abandonment toned with intimidation
But they can’t steal the thrill I feel negation expectations
And guilt trips call for too much fuel and duel cooperation
Lies won’t hide invisible scars
You looked right in my face and said you don’t deserve resentment
That night when you disowned me, yeah, you said you never meant it
I promised my forgiveness and you filled up with contentment
But I had my fingers crossed inside the pockets of my jacket
You always said that anger’s justified when provocation’s present
I grew up knowing you were wrong, accepting the unpleasant
But now today three states away I’m calling you pathetic
And if the whole world shit on you it’s only ‘cause you let it.
Lies won’t hide invisible scars.

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#DEMODFROWNLAND
#TERMLIMITSFORMODERATORS

WWWP

Thanks you two, I appreciate the encouragement.

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#DEMODFROWNLAND
#TERMLIMITSFORMODERATORS

Paedantic Basterd

When I read your journal, it reminds me of a less-manboyish/British High Fidelity, and that's why I keep reading it. If I just wanted to read random reviews, I'd trawl RYM instead.

If you're interested in collaborating collectives, you might enjoy Broken Social Scene, whose members past and present are uncountable, and who have produced a lot of excellent projects between them.

Mojo

As I mentioned quite recently, I remember you submitting that track to a members compilation here and I liked it so much I grabbed the EP that was uploaded to Last FM and I listened to that too. A few times. After a brief discussion around it recently, I listened to it again.

From listening to it I was always able to feel as though I had an understanding of what it was about, despite knowing very little about you. Now I know more I feel I understood the song correctly, but obviously not quite everything about it, the background, and the reasons for the lyrics. I am very glad you decided to write about it. Knowing more about it, knowing more about you, just makes me appreciate it more.

How old were you when you wrote it? I always felt you must have been quite young, but certainly not because of the song itself or it's content. If anything, these things would suggest you were actually a few years older than you must have been when you wrote it. You seem to have a firm grasp on lyrics and song writing, and as personal and as emotive as these lyrics are, they are delivered without a hint of angst or anything like that, but rather a maturity. I honestly was kind of blown away by that track. I really dug the members compilation, I thought it was solid and opened my eyes and ears to a lot of the talented people here, but your song stood out for me.

I'd actually love to hear more of your music, and as far as Why? go, I haven't ever listened to them. I've seen their name around here a lot, as you hinted at, but you've at least given me a reason to consider checking them out after writing such a personal entry about them and what they mean to you.

Good work

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Last.FM | Echoes and Dust

WWWP

Aww, you. Making me feel like what I do is worth something.

You mentioned earlier that you got the impression that the writing I do for my journal is just as much - if not more - for my own benefit than for an audience, and I feel that my songwriting is very similar. I never really expect people to listen to it - I started my youtube channel simply to share covers with friends back in Wyoming, I never expected the kind of feedback or following that I'm getting. I put a lot of effort into keeping it this way, as soon as I begin performing for someone or for something the magic of catharsis is lost. That said, I'm really glad you enjoy the track, it's definitely my most personal. The EP is total shit and it pains me to listen to it but nonetheless I'm glad it has fallen on ears other than my own, haha.

I was 17 and I was drunk. I was sitting on my porch with my guitar and a pack of cigarettes, had just learned chords on the guitar and was particularly fond of A minor. I used a rhyming dictionary for the first verse and then the rest of it seemed to just pour out. Thank you so much for your compliments. That song means a lot to me and I'm glad to learn the emotion was communicated accurately.

As soon as I make more music I'll share it with you

I've been in several bands since the Lawn Chronicles EP was uploaded, but none of them have worked out and I feel a bit dejected about it. My songwriting has taken a turn for the worse so I'm giving myself a break and mainly recording covers for the time being.

Thanks again for your response.

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#DEMODFROWNLAND
#TERMLIMITSFORMODERATORS

WWWP

This is one of the most flattering things you could say to me. Thank you for that, and for the reminder that I need to explore more of Broken Social Scene. <3

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#DEMODFROWNLAND
#TERMLIMITSFORMODERATORS