Live Transmission - My life as a transgendered musician

Above · 12-03-2011, 07:26 PM

gone

s_k · 12-03-2011, 08:03 PM

Nope. No questions.
Just surprised to see how closeted you have to be, both towards your parents and band members

.
It's sad to hear such a thing.

Above · 12-03-2011, 08:09 PM

gone

Paedantic Basterd · 12-03-2011, 08:19 PM

Welcome to Music Banter, Madeleine, and thank you for trusting us enough to share. I think we can all learn a lot from one another, mostly about music, and a bit about life.

Above · 12-03-2011, 08:25 PM

gone

Trollheart · 12-04-2011, 06:02 AM

What a brave post! There has been some real sharing on this forum, a lot of personal stuff, but this is probably the most intimate revelation anyone here has, er, revealed, at least since I've been here. Well done.

And apologies for the way you got/get treated. It's awful how people think they have a right to tell you how to run your life, and that their way is the only way. It's nothing close, but I do have an idea of how you feel, as I have been a crossdresser for decades (oh no! There goes my long-held secret!), and although I personally don't want to BE a woman nor have any interest in men sexually, I get great relief from dressing as a woman. In my case, my family knows but at first rejected the idea (brothers mostly) and then just sort of pretended it didn't happen. My sister was more accepting but even now she will understand that I may dress in my room but doesn't want to see or hear about it. She is bedbound with MS, so being her carer I don't really get that much time to dress, but take the opportunity when I can.

It's a huge thing "coming out", I know, and a massive risk. What if it's received badly? It usually is. You think people may have their suspicions but usually that's not the case; they're shocked, confused, often disgusted and not that seldom angry, as if you've paid them a personal affront. Why people can't just accept people for who they are I will never know.

It's sad that your family were so insensitive to what must have been a truly traumatic time for you, and were no help at all to you in coming to terms with who you are. Have you tried any of the TG support groups? I don't know if they're any good --- I've just posted on forums --- but it often helps to talk to someone who will listen and not judge.

I'll look forward to your reviews and so on, and if you would like to talk privately please feel free to do so. Sometimes it helps, and like the Bee Gees once wrote: it's only words, but words are all I have.

Take care and don't lose hope. Be who you are, and eff star star kay everyone who doesn't understand. It's their loss.

Be well

Trollheart aka Stacey-Lynn

Above · 12-04-2011, 11:17 AM

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Above · 12-05-2011, 05:14 PM

gone

Above · 12-18-2011, 04:24 PM

gone

Above · 12-27-2011, 06:26 PM

gone

12-03-2011, 07:26 PM	#1 (permalink)
Above Oh my golly! Join Date: Nov 2011 Location: England Posts: 339	Live Transmission - My life as a transgendered musician gone __________________ Be pure, Be vigilant, Behave Last edited by Above; 07-14-2012 at 08:24 PM.

12-03-2011, 08:03 PM	#2 (permalink)
s_k Music Addict Join Date: Nov 2010 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 2,206	Nope. No questions. Just surprised to see how closeted you have to be, both towards your parents and band members . It's sad to hear such a thing. __________________ Click here to see my collection

12-03-2011, 08:09 PM	#3 (permalink)
Above Oh my golly! Join Date: Nov 2011 Location: England Posts: 339	gone __________________ Be pure, Be vigilant, Behave Last edited by Above; 07-14-2012 at 08:24 PM.

12-03-2011, 08:25 PM	#5 (permalink)
Above Oh my golly! Join Date: Nov 2011 Location: England Posts: 339	gone __________________ Be pure, Be vigilant, Behave Last edited by Above; 07-14-2012 at 08:24 PM.

12-04-2011, 06:02 AM	#6 (permalink)
Trollheart Born to be mild Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: 404 Not Found Posts: 26,992	What a brave post! There has been some real sharing on this forum, a lot of personal stuff, but this is probably the most intimate revelation anyone here has, er, revealed, at least since I've been here. Well done. And apologies for the way you got/get treated. It's awful how people think they have a right to tell you how to run your life, and that their way is the only way. It's nothing close, but I do have an idea of how you feel, as I have been a crossdresser for decades (oh no! There goes my long-held secret!), and although I personally don't want to BE a woman nor have any interest in men sexually, I get great relief from dressing as a woman. In my case, my family knows but at first rejected the idea (brothers mostly) and then just sort of pretended it didn't happen. My sister was more accepting but even now she will understand that I may dress in my room but doesn't want to see or hear about it. She is bedbound with MS, so being her carer I don't really get that much time to dress, but take the opportunity when I can. It's a huge thing "coming out", I know, and a massive risk. What if it's received badly? It usually is. You think people may have their suspicions but usually that's not the case; they're shocked, confused, often disgusted and not that seldom angry, as if you've paid them a personal affront. Why people can't just accept people for who they are I will never know. It's sad that your family were so insensitive to what must have been a truly traumatic time for you, and were no help at all to you in coming to terms with who you are. Have you tried any of the TG support groups? I don't know if they're any good --- I've just posted on forums --- but it often helps to talk to someone who will listen and not judge. I'll look forward to your reviews and so on, and if you would like to talk privately please feel free to do so. Sometimes it helps, and like the Bee Gees once wrote: it's only words, but words are all I have. Take care and don't lose hope. Be who you are, and eff star star kay everyone who doesn't understand. It's their loss. Be well Trollheart aka Stacey-Lynn __________________ Trollheart: Signature-free since April 2018

12-03-2011, 08:19 PM	#4 (permalink)
Paedantic Basterd Music Addict Join Date: Sep 2010 Posts: 5,184	Welcome to Music Banter, Madeleine, and thank you for trusting us enough to share. I think we can all learn a lot from one another, mostly about music, and a bit about life.

12-04-2011, 11:17 AM	#7 (permalink)
Above Oh my golly! Join Date: Nov 2011 Location: England Posts: 339	gone __________________ Be pure, Be vigilant, Behave Last edited by Above; 07-14-2012 at 08:24 PM.

12-05-2011, 05:14 PM	#8 (permalink)
Above Oh my golly! Join Date: Nov 2011 Location: England Posts: 339	gone __________________ Be pure, Be vigilant, Behave Last edited by Above; 07-14-2012 at 08:24 PM.

12-18-2011, 04:24 PM	#9 (permalink)
Above Oh my golly! Join Date: Nov 2011 Location: England Posts: 339	gone __________________ Be pure, Be vigilant, Behave Last edited by Above; 07-14-2012 at 08:24 PM.

12-27-2011, 06:26 PM	#10 (permalink)
Above Oh my golly! Join Date: Nov 2011 Location: England Posts: 339	gone __________________ Be pure, Be vigilant, Behave Last edited by Above; 07-14-2012 at 08:25 PM.