Trollheart

Members' Top Ten Lists
And so we come to Mondo's top three, and at number
3

Souls at zero --- Neurosis --- 1992

I've heard quite a bit about these guys, so I'm interested to see what they're like, especially given the “post-rock” tag Wiki has ascribed to them. Nice kind of ambient opening to the first track, “To crawl under one's skin”, then a voice speaks with some weird sound effects in the background. Okay, thought that was building to a big heavy guitar there, but it's quite melodic even though it is guitar. Heavy enough, but not the assault I had expected. The vocal takes me by surprise, and is something of a disappointment, being a yelled, screamed one as the music gets much more chaotic. Not a fan of this method of jumping from one style to another, as I mentioned with Maudln of the Well.

Second track starts off well, but now I'm wary of those crazy vocals, just waiting for them to jump out at me like some madman wielding a knife in the darkened alleys. Where is he? Where is he?He's there isn't he? I know he is. Why doesn't he just get it over with? It's the waiting that ... oh, there he is. And the vocal is not anywhere near as bad as on the first track. Shouted yes but intelligible. Listenable. Much better. Like the use of flutes in the quieter section of “Flight” but “The web” (not the Marillion song, I hasten to add!) does nothing for me. Too loud, abrasive and loose. Some nice strings there at the end section of “Chronology of survival”, but this album is boring me now. I get the impression this is another album where the band try to do too much, be too clever and miss the mark more often than they hit it. Not for me sorry. The closing short instrumental gives a tantalising glimpse of what this album could have been, but it's already over.

At number
2
Mondo originally had Powerslave, but changed it to

Piece of mind --- Iron Maiden --- 1983

Probably my third favourite Maiden album after the two obvious, "Piece of mind" is not gold all the way through but it's very close to it. Opening with the powerful "Where eagles dare", the album tends to go through a series of "Boy's Own" adventures, as we scale forbidding cliffs with the SAS and take on the Nazis, fight and die as an ordinary soldier, and wreak our revenge, Conan-style, or perhaps not quite. That's it though: the stories are flavoured with realism and are not just gung-ho tales of bravery. In "The Trooper" the eponymous soldier dies, not particularly bravely, in fact possibly futilely, and though such a death is lauded in "Die with your boots on", the revenge of the unnamed (but surely based on Conan the Barbarian) man in "Sun and steel" is not realised, as his enemy "Take you and your blade/ Break you both in two." Not to mention the story of Daedalus's overconfident and arrogant son coming a cropper in "Flight of Icarus".

But it's an album full of catchy songs, killer riffs and of course Dickinson's trademark "air-raid siren" scream. There are surely bad tracks. I was not impressed with "Revelations", the aforementioned singer's only solo effort on the album, and the less said about "Quest for fire" the better, proving that even godlike Steve Harris can occasionally write a duff tune! And boo to Frank Herbert, whose intransigence over allowing the band to use the name "Dune" led to the closer being titled "To tame a land", the second epic track to close a Maiden album.

Basically, "Piece of mind" built on the phenomenal success of "Number of the Beast", solidfied the band's lineup and paved the way for one of their greatest albums a year later, leading to this period, 1982-1988, being seen as Maiden's golden era, when they could barely put a foot wrong.

And so we come to his number
1
which is from these guys

When the kite string pops --- Acid Bath – 1994

Says they're a sludge metal band, and as of now I think my only real experience with that subgenre is Conan, who did not impress me. Oh, and it has fourteen tracks! Thanks man! Well it starts off at a snail's pace and I wonder if it will remain like this? Then there's a rough but not indecipherable vocal with Sabbathy guitars --- and now it's kicking up in speed a little as “The blue” gets goi --- no, now it's gone back slow again. This could be a long --- what? Seventy minutes, almost? Lord preserve me! With titles like “Finger paintings of the insane”, “What colour is death”, “The bones of baby dolls” and (ugh!) “Cassie eats cockroaches”, I'm not exactly looking forward to this. Could Mondo's top album be worse (to me) than Janszoon's?

Well a measure of how bored I am with this album is that it's now five tracks in and I haven't noticed. I can't pick out anything interesting about any of the songs. I know it's seen as an underground classic and I'm sure it's well played and written; I just really don't care. It's doing nothing for me. The tempo comes and goes but the songs just blur by. Alright, “Jezebel” has a nice sort of spoken vocal against a cool bass line, and ... yeah, I like the bassy opening and sweet guitar on “Scream of the butterfly”. A lot better; restrained vocal, no mad hammering drums and I could really get into this. Don't expect it to last of course...

Well it did, and I must say that's the first track on the album I've a) noticed and b) enjoyed. Could this be a turning point? Um. no. The next track goes back to the slow, grindy, sludgy feel of the opening few songs, and it's just terribly plodding and boring to me. And we're back to me not caring. Honestly. I'm reading the paper as this continues. That's how interested I am. Oh wait: the last two tracks were good. “The colour of death” and “The bones of baby dolls” especially. Lovely acoustic piece with what sounds to be maybe mandolin?

Okay, so the last track was horrible and now it's over. Sorry Mondo, but this album just did absolutely nothing for me. A few good tracks but most of it passed me by, the ones I didn't actually hate. Not going to be a fan of these boys any time soon!



So that's it for your top ten lists. Thanks to all who submitted theirs, and sorry I couldn't choose them all, but I do have to eat from time to time! Maybe next year. I may --- I haven't decided yet, lots yet to do --- throw my own list in at some point before the end of Metal Month II. Hope nobody took offence if I didn't like their selections; I realise you all put a lot of work into your lists and that these albums mean a lot to each of you, so please don't take my criticisms as putting forward a view that there is nothing good about these albums. Where I was not impressed, it was and is purely a personal opinion, and not to be taken as anything else. Thanks again and see you next year I hope!

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Trollheart: Signature-free since April 2018

Trollheart

As metal Month II continues and seems to be receiving a better-than-expected reception, with rather a lot of participation and a good deal of debate, seems some members have decided to mark this month in their own journals.

Here are a shortlist of members who have used Metal Month II as an opportunity to explore the world of Heavy Metal in journals in which they might normally not otherwise cover such a genre.

http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...ime-place.html

http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...n-dollars.html

http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...s-journal.html

http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...-endeavor.html



There's still time if you want to write an article on metal, either in your own journal to tie in with Metal Month II, or even here as a guest reviewer or contributor. Just PM me if the latter and if the former, well, you know where your journal is!

Glad you're all enjoying it so far, and it's far from over yet! Lots more to come before we close on Halloween!

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Trollheart

He's been gone an awful long time, and my arms are getting tired, stretched up like this. Feel an itch .. why have I not felt anything there before? Oh. Because it's in my boobs. My new, proudly jutting boobs that are straining against the tight leather of this corset he has me fastened into. Better not mention it when he returns; he's likely to offer to scratch it for me! Just think of something else, Troll. Trollina? Trollette? Man, this place is getting to me: I'm even starting to think like a woman! Where the hell is he? Not that I'm looking forward to our next session or anything, but I'd prefer to just get it over with. Like I said before, it's the waiting that's the killer.

Oh come on! How much computer porn can one man ... oh wait. I hear footsteps descending, and the muffled strains of death metal as he gets nearer. Guess his headphones aren't exactly noise cancelling!

“Enjoyed our last little session?” he gloats as he looms forward out of the darkness, a maniacal grin on his pasty face. At sight of him,I inadvertently shrink back --- I am a girl now, after all, and he has me in his power. There's a raw musk in the air. He notices. “Hah! You obviously did. Well, if you thought that was bad, look at what I have for you today. As Alice Cooper once said, welcome to my nightmare!

Or rather, to yours!”



Chocolate starfish and the hot dog flavoured water --- Limp Bizkit --- 2000

Ah crap! He knows I hate nu metal! Bloody mixing in rap with metal. What the fuck is the point? There's no point in trying to change his mind though, so I had better get this over with. He's rigged me up with a wireless link to his laptop, from which he can select the music he wants off the internet and then play it through the headphones he's stuck on my head with --- appropriately enough --- Crazy Glue, so I have no control over this and have to listen to what he pumps through my headphones. Damn it, but this is going to hurt!

All right then, do your worst, you diabolical fiend! I'm woman enough to --- I mean, man enough to --- urgh! 15 tracks, and one is nine minutes long! And the opening one has dark vocoder on it. You all know how much I hate vocoder, even if Daft Punk and cloudcover are slowly changing my attitude in that direction. Well in fairness the intro doesn't do much but the first track proper “Hot dog” just uses the words “fucked up” so much it's grating and not at all clever. In fact, I'd go so far as to say this is nothing close to metal: I might as well be listening to a rap record. Yuck. Oh look: they robbed W.A.S.P's line ”Fuck like an animal” --- well, no, that was “like a beast”, but it's close enough. I can feel my energy beginning to drain away even at this early stage. Lord help me.

HEALTH: 75%

Well that was terrible. Can it get worse? Um, yeah. Yeah it can. Giving the middle finger to Daltrey and the boys, Limp Bizkit (what kind of a name is that for a band anyway?) title the next song (I use the word in its widest possible meaning) “My generation”, but it's nothing like the Who's classic. This is like a band with the attitude of Slayer with the talent of Slipknot, with apologies to both bands. Ow! I think one of my eyes just exploded. Yep, there it goes, dribbling down my cheek. Wish my ears would do the same, then I wouldn't have to listen to this garbage. Is that a guitar, or someone strangling a chicken? Hard to say. More gratuitous use of the word “fuck”: how mature.

HEALTH: 40%

At least the next track has a decent guitar intro, sounds heavier but then Durst comes in again with his godawful rap, and the moment he uses that word again --- and there he goes --- there goes my other eye. This is not good. This guy's ego is totally misplaced. Did someone tell him once he had talent, other than for being a prick? Even the drumming here sounds like someone banging dustbins. Just terrible. God. Now he's whining, which is even worse than his singing. Again, I use the word in its widest possible context. This is painful. You know, at one point he shouts/sings ”Just shut your fucking mouth!” My sentiments exactly, you cocksucker.

HEALTH: 21%

Again, a decent guitar intro, some nice bass as we head into “My way” (is he so strapped for inspiration for song titles that he has to rob classics?) and dear God! Melody! It's, to be completely fair, not that bad. Totally derivative lyric again of course --- ”It's my way or the highway” --- I'll take the highway please. But it's not as bad as the crap that I've been forced to listen to up to now. Not what I could fairly call a standout, but the least bad so far.

HEALTH: 54%

Well that didn't last of course. The next track is back to terrible, with a stupid ”Rollin', rollin', rollin' line and of course more gratuitous use of the word “fuck”. Guess it has to be in every song they write. Has a certain amount of repetitive melody in it, but just annoys the hell out of me.

HEALTH: 32%

Oh dear God! Did Durst just grab ICP lines about rednecks and machetes? This song is so full of cliches it's almost funny. Almost. This is supposed to sample “Life in the fast lane” but I don't hear it, other than the words. Utter crap.

HEALTH: 16%

Okay, okay. As I slide towards death there's a slower song which may save me. What's it called? Fucked if I know: I lost both my eyes some tracks back, remember? Oh. Batty giggles in my headphones like some demented producer telling me it's called “The one”. Fine. Well it's not too bad and I can feel a little strength coming back into my legs, which were about to fall off I think. Kind of a new-wave/Gary Numan vibe to it. Maybe.

HEALTH: 28%

Oh well, that's it. Sampling classical music and throwing a nasty rap on top of it, plus add somebody called Xzbit into the mix, goodbye cruel world! Hey! My left arm just fell off! How am I going to operate my digital watch now?

HEALTH: 0%

Hello from beyond the grave! Yes, as you probably know, Batty is so sadistic that even death doesn't release me from having to continue to listen to this trash.Now I have to listen to them slaughter the “Mission Impossible” theme --- appropriate, as listening to this album without being tied up and forced to would indeed be that --- the ultimate laziness. Let someone else write the music then spew terrible lyrics across it. Rubbish. The big guitar coming in is good, but the song is basically garbage.

HEALTH: -21%

Damn! Batty has just whispered in my ear to tell me that there are no short tracks left: five, seven, six, six and nine minutes! To quote EAP, “God save my poor soul!” Incidentally, the next one is terrible. A whiny, “leave-me-alone-stop-interfering-in-my-life-teenage-angst-bitch” song. What do you mean, like all the rest? Oh yeah. Like all the rest.

HEALTH: -44%

Meh, this one's not too terrible. Bit of melody to it. Maybe becoming a zombie --- sorry, proto-zombie --- changes your view. Or maybe I'm just getting used to being dead. I don't hate this. Much.

HEALTH: - 20%

Oh god no! He's talking! In a low voice! Is that meant to be seductive? If I wasn't already dead I'd throw my guts up. But wait ... it's a slow, acoustic ... good god. Could these actually be a decent track? Vocal harmonies? No rap? No bad language? Seriously? Have I got this album mixed up? Or is it about to slap me upside the ... head, Batlord! I was going to say head, you perverted .... no not that sort of head! God! I am dead, you do realise that? Why are you grinning...? Um. This track is great so far. I can feel strength coming back into my limbs, my heart is beginning to beat a little....

HEALTH 3%

I live again! Oh. And then we get “Rollin wotsit” again, and I give up the ghost.

HEALTH -15%

Oh well. Dead again. Ah come on! Who writes a nine-minute plus Outro??? Oh holy crap! It's just some inane talk, laughter and Durst being fucking Durst! That's it: I'm seriously done now.

HEALTH: -50%

Congratulations Batty! You've turned me into a proto-zombie! I'm sure your mother is very proud of you. Well, at least after this it can only get better. Nothing could be as bad as what I just had to suffer through.

Could it?

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The Batlord

Wow. Even Trollheart thinks that an aural blitzkrieg of pure death metal noise is apparently vastly superior to boring riffs and talentless rap. So, it's Thorr's Hammer and then Gnaw Their Tongues, right?

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Trollheart

And so we come to the top three...

Prodigal son (Killers)
Being a ballads kind of guy, as everyone knows, it will be of little surprise to anyone that Maiden's two ballads occupy slots near the top of my countdown. But though “Strange world” took me by surprise, “Prodigal son” just slammed me to the floor and kept me there, hardly able to breathe. Following on from a throat-tearing, axe-wielding, heartstopping anthem like the title track, it was a total change of pace, a real what you Americans would I guess call curveball, and it certainly threw me. The use of the word “Lamia” in the song has always puzzled me: the first time I heard that (well the only time really) word used was in Genesis's “The lamb lies down on Broadway”, and surely Maiden had no interest in Peter Gabriel's conceptual masterpiece? Of course, when I checked later --- when I could, with the advent of the Internet and Wiki --- I found out that Lamia was an ancient Libyan queen who fell under a curse and became a demon who ate children. Who knew, huh?

Even so, the usage of the name has always mystified me. I don't know what “Prodigal son” is about. Is Harris (who wrote it of course) retelling the ancient tale, or using it as a metaphor, or even the basis for his own story? Again, Di'Anno puts in a powerfully understated performance, but it's really the guitarwork of Murray and Smith that make the song, especially the minute-long instrumental introduction. The song has a beautiful, rolling melody that though it never really changes that much over the course of the song doesn't seem repetitive.

And of course there's the obligatory solo, which has touches of Arabic/Egyptian in it, but is like the singing very restrained and laidback, with the guys trading licks carefully so as not to destroy the tone of the ballad. Burr's drumming here is exceptional, and of course when is Harris's bass anything else? It was also one of the longest Maiden songs ever written at that time, at just over six minutes. The ending is perfect, with the susurrating drums and the last guitar notes taking it out magically.


Killers (Killers)
Well you didn't really expect this not to feature, did you? A song that at the time served both to encapsulate what Iron Maiden were all about, provide them with an iconic image and deliver some, ah, bitchin' riffs, as well as afford Di'Anno the chance to really let himself go and immerse himself in the persona of the maniacal killer, stalking his victims through the darkened subways, a twisted grin on his slavering face, a hatchet in his hand, blood staining its blade as he lifted it against the moonlight where it glistened, awaiting its next victim. This is of course the image that adorned the second album from Iron Maiden, and made me kind of wary about the kind of music that might reside within (I only bought the debut after getting I think “Number of the Beast” and “Piece of mind”, so about 1983).

The thick, pulsing bass that opens the song is typical of Harris's talent for imbuing his music with a sense of threat and menace, then Di'Anno's roars and screams which drop to a satisfied, gurgling growl with a very large helping of homicidal laughter as the guitars start to screech alongside Burr's thundering delivery just sets the scene for the song. It's quite rightly considered a masterpiece in the band's catalogue, still played and very much requested at all their gigs, often as part of the encore. If anyone who had only heard maybe “Strange world”, “Prodigal son” and a few other tracks were to somehow sneer that Maiden were not metal, (sacrilege of the highest order!) then “Killers” lays any such doubts to rest. Built on a galloping, almost out-of-control guitar line and a racing drumbeat, it's the tale, not surprisingly, of a madman on the loose, but there is a slight twist.

Whether the guy is a schizophrenic or just loses his memory after the kill, the song does contain an idea that he is not in control of his actions when he kills, as the lyric ”Excitement shakes me/ Oh God help me!/ What have I done?/ I've done it again!” amply demonstrates. I also love the way the lyric begins as a narration, a warning --- ”He walks in the subway/ His eyes burn a hole in your back” --- but later changes to the first person , as it's revealed that the narrator is also the killer --- ”He walks in the subway/ My eyes burn a hole in your back” --- clever. A typically punchy, raw guitar solo takes the midsection, the sort of downshifting guitar (don't know how else to describe it: you know the one) coming back in for the conclusion of the song. Again the lines “Look out I'm coming to getcha!” resurface, and a big maniacal laugh with a scream bring the song to its frenetic conclusion. A true classic, and worthy of being the title track, almost a second signature song for Iron Maiden.

And that brings us to the final choice, my number one early Iron maiden song. Before we see what that is, let's take a leaf out of the pages of countless countdowns and run back through the top ten:

10. Prowler
9. Iron Maiden
8. Purgatory
7 Transylvania
6. Wrathchild
5. Drifter
4. Strange world
3. Prodigal son
2. Killers

And so, we come to the very top. Of course, this is not my alltime favourite Iron Maiden song --- though it would definitely come in the top five --- but of the pre-Dickinson era, it's a song that stands so far apart from the rest of their work that it's almost worthy of having been on a later album. It's an indication of the direction in which they would begin to move on future albums, and it stands proudly at number

Phantom of the opera (Iron Maiden)

Yeah, from the first guitar notes, repeated three times till they rise into that superb solo and then drag in Di'anno's “Oh yeah!” this song has it all. The longest song Maiden had ever recorded until “To tame a land” just edged it by seconds in 1983, and then of course all bets were off with “The rime of the Ancient Mariner”. The first song to show a leaning towards the progressive metal approach that would begin to characterise their work from “Piece of mind” onwards (some would say that “Hallowed be thy name” is the first real progressive metal piece they did, but I don't see it that way), this song became famous outside of the world of metal when its intro was used as the soundtrack to an advertisement for an energy drink here, Lucozade.

It's the first Maiden song I see that is almost divided into sections. There's the guitar riff opening it and taking it up to the main vocal, then that vocal, then the middle section where Murray racks off an enthralling solo, then another section where it stops and then rises on Harris's pumping bass line, and finally a return to the opening riff to close the whole thing. I don't know whether it changes time signatures, as I'm no musician, but I wouldn't be surprised. Although it's loosely based on the novel and movie of the same name, “Phantom of the opera” takes a darker, more chilling look at the title character, seeing him more as a killer, a sadist, with the lines ”You torture me back at your lair” and ”I know that you're gonna scratch me, maim me and maul” Harris's Phantom is no gentle actor shunned by society and hiding in the shadows watching the love of his life, unable ever to have her. He is a dangerous, deadly and quite possibly insane figure who only wants to torture and kill. A Phantom of the Opera, you might say, for the eighties.

Di'anno's voice and singing style suits this song perfectly, although it is perhaps odd that he is not singing in the persona of the title character, but that of the object of his affections/intentions. Or possibly the hostage he takes. I'm not that familiar with the story, and anyway it probably doesn't matter that much. Nevertheless, he puts in a fine performance --- one of his best with the band --- and really ends up owning the song, as they say. Again, this is a song that, though long at over seven minutes, has no fat and not a second wasted. Every part of it fits together perfectly, like a well-made jigsaw, and the whole picture is stunning to behold. Of course it's still a staple at Maiden concerts, and always will be. There's even a shock at the end, when the last words are spoken, a kind of snarled echo brings them back acapella, which was, the first time I heard it, a shock as (Old Fart Alert! Old Fart Alert!) I prepared to lift the needle from the record only to have my hand almost jump across the vinyl as Di'Anno's voice came back from out of the void to assault my ears one more time. Freaky, man, and not a little scary!

Because it is, as I see it, the best constructed song in the early Iron Maiden catalogue, because it is sung perfectly and because even now, over forty years later, it's still shouted for, demanded and greeted with delighted abandon when it's played at gigs, “Phantom of the Opera” is my alltime favourite number one early Iron Maiden song.

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Trollheart

Thought I might get GTT over with, but if you want to do it in that order, okay. Just let me know. Yeah I know: I hated Cryptopsy, but the fact was I couldn't make out any of the lyrics whereas here I, rather unfortunately, could. If it's a choice between grindcore and Limp B, grind me up!

Which reminds me, time to do another "Meat Grinder"....

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The Batlord

Gnaw Their Tongues should definitely come last. I planned it for my big finale.

Oh, and if you want some of Cryptopsy's lyrics...

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Mondo Bungle

Not impressed with the best song on Piece of Mind and one of the best Maiden tracks of all time huh...

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Trollheart

Which? "Revelations"? No. Surely not "Quest for fire"? I don't see how either of those --- or anything off PoM to be fair --- could qualify as one of the best Maiden songs of all time. If I had to pick a favourite from that album (tough) it would probably be "Sun and steel". Maybe.

Honestly, I thought when I saw your post you were gonna bitch at me about Acid Bath....

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Isbjørn

"Revelations" is among the greatest Maiden songs and you know it.

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