Trollheart

Last year was the inaugural one for Metal Month, which as I may have mentioned once or twice I plan to make an annual event, and it was great fun. But one thing it was definitely lacking was structure. It's not that I didn't have the time to put a special layout together, more that 2013 was to be seen as a sort of “introduction to Heavy Metal” in many ways, a chance for those who didn't know, disliked or even hated it to see what it was really all about. So I concentrated on reviewing albums from as many and as varied bands within the genre as I could find, resulting in some odd choices for me, everything from Slipknot and Possessed to Morbid Angel and Death. Of course, my own favourites were well represented too --- Maiden, Motorhead, Saxon, Tank et al --- but generally it was a bit of a grab-bag, a sampler of the genre, if such a thing could be achieved in such a short time. And of course it couldn't.

But this time out I wanted to have nore of an overall flow to the project, so in addition to, as already mentioned, each week of the month being dedicated to the Metal from a different country, we'll be featuring a particular artiste, and doing our damndest to get their whole catalogue (studio only; I rarely do live material) reviewed, or at least looked at. And who better to start us off than these guys? If you read my review of Mastodon’s “Blood Mountain” immediately before this, you may have picked up a clue or three as to who they’re gonna be. Ladies and gentlemen, the first Featured Artist on Metal Month, I give you...


Now, I'm not going to be doing an in-depth profile of the band. I know little enough about them anyway, and really, if you want the skinny on them there's a guy called The Batlord you should talk to. But what is generally accepted about Slayer is that they are “the real deal”: they self-financed their first album, toured in a battered old Camaro and rather quickly, through the underground metal grapevine, became not only known but respected and eventually worshipped as one of the “Big 4” of Thrash Metal, along with Metallica, Megadeth and Anthrax.

Their first album was “Show no mercy”, released in 1983, and I already reviewed it as part of the original Metal Month in 2013, so if you want to read what I had to say click here http://www.musicbanter.com/members-j...ml#post1378575, but before they went into the studio to record their second album they hit us with an EP which certainly earns The Batlord's seal of approval (which probably means I'll hate it and vice versa) as one of their dirtiest, grittiest and indeed shittiest (in the best possible usage of the term) recordings. It only has three tracks, though the version I found on Grooveshark includes the bonus track, so we have four to listen to and review.

Haunting the chapel --- Slayer --- 1984 (Metal Blade)

I'm aware this was the beginning not only of Slayer's more “Thrash-oriented” approach, but also of their deeper descent into Satanic imagery; despite its dark cover, the debut was not really overly concerned with what I would term Black Metal lyrics. Oh, there was “Evil has no boundaries, "Black Magic” and of course “The Antichrist”, but the rest of the songs tended to tread more, shall we say, mundane thematic territory? You had war, war and, er, more war. But still what you would think of as general Metal fare. “Haunting the chapel” was, it would appear, almost the genesis of the “real” Slayer, for all the world as if the guys had tested the waters with “Show no mercy” and, having “gotten away with it”, so to speak, thought Now we'll REALLY show them what we're about!

And on this short EP, that's exactly what they did.

You know you're in for a bad, or good, depending on your tastes in Metal, time when “Chemical warfare” begins. A song that was to go on to become a staple at their gigs, and one of their most beloved by fans of the band, it hammers at you like a wild beast, the closest cousin I could attribute to it being Motorhead, but somehow it's more brutal even than Lemmy's famous trio. Perhaps it's the more snarly, angry voice of Tom Araya that adds an extra level of violence to the music, but at the same time, I must admit, I can make out the words, and I've heard worse singers certainly. Warfare is definitely a good theme for the opener though, as this is an all-out sonic assault on your ears, and believe me, you're gonna lose! Kerry King shows why he has gained such respect in the genre with a tight, if short solo, then goes back to helping Jeff Hanneman and Dave Lombardo musically kick the shit out of you.

There is, of course, not even the faintest semblance of finesse on this EP --- whether this continues throughout their albums or not time will tell as I listen to them --- but then you wouldn't really expect that would you? It's certainly great music to headbang to, and annoy the neighbours with. Pussies, as Batty would no doubt say. That's the longest track by far at just over six minutes, and at least on the copy I'm using, you can immediately detect the difference in the production as “Captor of sin” kicks off: it's much rawer, hollow compared to “Chemical warfare” and somehow lacks the punch of the former. That said, it's another fast, heavy track with a snarled vocal, with a definite Sabbath influence on it. During the original Metal Month I came across a lot of bands who almost made my ears bleed --- Morbid Angel, Death, Napalm Death, Possessed --- and compared to them Slayer are far and away the best in terms of musical technicality and --- dare I say it? --- melody! Gulp! Yeah, I'm surprised myself, but you know, I can listen to this. The title track is up next, and once again the production jumps in quality: much richer, deeper, more professional. It's very --- very! --- slightly slower than the first two tracks, and has an almost boogie feel to it. Well, I think it does.

Oh yeah, but then, as if Kerry heard me and snarled to himself “Slow you say? You fucker! I'll show you slow!” the tempo jumps and suddenly we're belting along at breakneck speed as the boys charge towards the ending of the song, Mr. King ripping off what can only be described as a searing solo to take us there. Wow!

And that would be it, and is it, if you don't have the extended edition. But I do. And with it comes “Aggressive perfector”, with a big, murky, brooding opening on the geetar that would bring tears to Tony Iommi's eyes. Tom's voice is the most coherent I've heard on this short album and he really does the song proud. Makes me wonder why it wasn't on the original pressings of the EP? Like I guess most Slayer songs it doesn't stay slow and broody for long, and leaps along towards the finish line as Hanneman and King blaze twin trails of fire down the middle of Lombardo's blistering fusilade. Emulaitng one of his heroes, Tom gives off a Dickinson-style scream as the song crashes to its, and the EP's, abrupt conclusion. I feel wrecked already!

TRACKLISTING

Chemical warfare
Captor of sin
Haunting the chapel
Aggressive perfector

Certainly a change from the debut album, this is faster, more powerful and a whole lot more aggressive than “Show no mercy”, and laid down the blueprint for what Slayer were to become, and indeed, the framework which would be copied by so many bands who would follow in their wake. Mind you, I'd think you would follow these guys at your peril: like Eddie on the cover of Maiden's second album, they look and sound like they'd whirl around, see you and pounce on you, rending you to shreds for daring to share the same air as them! Ah, but wouldn't it be worth it?

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Trollheart

Woo-hoo! It’s Metal Month. Again. And that means not one, but four visits to

Now, my luck has been, shall we say, less than salubrious with this section to date, so let’s hope that out of four sessions I can get at least one or two decent bands. But if the Curse of The Batlord doth hold true, I may find nothing but unsigned bands, demos and bands who split up and left nary a musical footprint on yon Web for me to track down. Ah well. Like they say, if you’re not in you can’t win. So let’s dive in.

Well my luck certainly runs true to form, or maybe Batty’s curse is more real than I had thought, as I unearth yet another unsigned band, and a death metal one into the bargain. They hail from la belle France, and call themselves

(Yeah, I thought it was Sepultura too at first. Cue big rush of excitement then a real deflation as the air was let out of my expectations)

Oh my mistake. I should have said they called themselves Sulphura. cos guess what? They broke up. Yep. And with one EP released in 1995, who’ll bet their beer money that I’ll be able to find anything --- anything --- of them on the net? Nobody? Wise men and women, all of you. Sigh. Let’s go through the motions then…

Spotify: negative. Grooveshark: negative. YouTube: neg --- oh wait. There’s one video. And here it is.

Yeah, they seem multi-talented all right. Mystery why they didn’t conquer the world. Lord almighty! Moving on…

Even better this time! Not a death metal act, but a grindcore one! And one who are a) unsigned and b) have one demo and one EP to their name. On the plus (?) side, they’re still together, being relatively recent, only formed since 2011. Then again, both their releases came in that year and nothing since, so I’d say finding anything from them will be unlikely.

Hailing from Sweden, they seem to have been in two minds about their debut EP. Should we title it, or shouldn’t we? They decided not to, and so it’s called “Untitled”. Either that, or they’re just lazy or unimaginative bastards. Oh, a hunting we will go, a hunting we will go…

Well, to my everlasting surprise, shock and not a little disappointment, about half of their EP is avaiable on YouTube (thanks a lot, guys!) so I guess this is the one we’re doing. No, there’s nothing running down my leg. Look, I don’t care what you smell…

Hmm. Are these radioactive mutants? Why are they all green? I thought it was grindcore, not greencore! Oh ho ho ho! A little harmless levity serves to distract from the acrid stench of … look, just leave it ok! I’ll change when I get a chance. Right now it’s time to introduce you to one of my most hated subgenres, despite the fact that I haven’t heard anything from any band other than Napalm Death. Ladies and gentlemen, Trollheart does Grindcore!

Why do I hate it? Well, just look at what Wiki has to say about it: ”Grindcore is characterized by a noise-filled sound that uses heavily distorted, down-tuned guitars, grinding overdriven bass, high speed tempo, blast beats, and vocals which consist of growls and high-pitched shrieks.” Grindcore - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia Like, it really sounds like my sort of Metal, don’t it? Look, can’t I just pretend I listened and say it’s crap? No? That’s not in the spirit of Metal Month II, nor indeed the idea behind The Meat Grinder? Who made these stupid rules up? I wanna talk to …. oh. Yeah. Right.

Fine then. Big deep breath and let’s break out the earplugs. But before we dive into the --- ahem! --- music, let’s give you the VS on these guys. Whaddya mean, what are VS? Ain’t ya never watched Miss World? Vital Statistics, man. Vital Statistics.

Band name: Crypt of the Zombilord
Nationality: Swedish
Subgenre: Grindcore (May the Lord have …)
Born: 2011
Status: Active
Albums: Untitled (2011)
Live albums: None
Collections/Anthologies/Boxsets: None
Lineup: Elk (Guitar, vocals) F
Bergman (Drums) F
Robban (Bass)F
(What? No cello or keybaords?)

What else can I tell you about them? Well they certainly have a sense of humour, as this article INQUISITIVE ELKS Punk, Rock, Metal, Movies, Kvlt, Life.: CRYPT OF THE ZOMBILORD - INTERVIEW,masquerading as an interview, shows. so they’re not up their own arses, which is a good start. However I’m not fooled, and can feel the flesh beginning to crawl off my bones in anticipation of this ordeal. On the plus side for me, all their songs are very short and there are only eight on the EP, five of which I can find. So I guess that’s enough stalling. Hey ho --- let’s go!


Untitled --- Crypt of the Zombilord --- 2011 (Independent)

The album opens with “Okazaka fragments”, which is just short of two minutes. This seems to be about standard length for their tracks. Well it’s fast, blisteringly fast guitar as expected, with the vocal alternating between high-pitched scream and gutteral growl. And it’s over. “Cultural hyphae” is next, and it’s just slightly over two minutes, with a big grindy guitar that takes up more than half of that, then the vocal is again split between agonising screams and a dark rumbling devilish snarl. And it’s over. Next we have “Deception of the scourge”, one and a half minutes and the only footage I could get was live, so it’s even less intelligible than it would be on a studio recording. Nah, it’s just noise to me. Sorry, can’t even make out the vocals if they’re there and the guitar just seems to be cranking the same chords out. See if you can do any better. Here’s the video.

The tasteful acoustic ballad “Government shit” is next, and the vocal drops to a low-key … yeah. It’s more of the same. Nobody was fooled by my clever ploy, were they? In reality, it only runs for fifty-three seconds, which is fifty-three seconds too long in my opinion. This really is terrible. I could never get into this. I’d get into death metal before I’d get into this. Hell, I’d get into black metal before it! Sadly, the next three tracks I can’t find, so we’re left with the closer, “Tombrider” (no, not Tomb Raider!) and it’s live again. Via cameraphone, no less! Ah, wouldn’t matter if it was in 1080 HD, this would still sound shit. What a mess.

TRACKLISTING

Okazaka fragments
Cultural hyphae
Deception of the scourge
Government shit
The lost trailblazers
Filled with spiders
Into the crypt
Tombrider

Well I’m glad CotZ have a sense of humour, because their music sucks. All right, let me just take these stilettos off and remove my false fingernails: there. Bitch mode cancelled. This may be someone’s cup of tea but it ain’t mine. I normally try to say something complimentary or at least not unkind about every band I review, but here I literally can’t say anything. Even death metal has a sort of melody, black has some decent lyrics on occasion. This just has nothing to me: toneless, tuneless guitars and vocals that sound like someone strangling a mongoose.

Other than that it’s fine.
(And that's only because I can't award zero cleaver ratings...)

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Trollheart

Last year I started this section, concentrating on the Metal albums which have either meant the most to me over the years or which enhanced my enjoyment of the genre after having listened to them. This year I intend to continue this small exploration with another look at some albums which certainly fall under the category of



MSG --- Michael Schenker Group --- 1981 (Chrysalis)

Some people here might discount Schenker and the Scorpions as being more hard rock than Heavy Metal, and that’s probably a fair assessment, but this is my section and this album did have quite an effect on me. At the time, I believe I may have listened to one or two Scorpions albums (“Blackout”, “Animal magnetism” etc) and pretty much did not like them, and still don’t. For me, the screaming of vocalist Klaus Meines never really sat well, and I was not, nor probably ever will be, a fan of the Scorps. So why did I buy this album?

I’m not completely sure. It may have been one of those spur-of-the-moment purchases, it may have been cheap second hand or it may have been recommended by the Bible of Heavy Metal at the time, “Kerrang!” magazine. It’s even possible that Tommy at Sound Cellar, my local rock record shop, convinced me to try it. It’s over thirty years now, so don’t hold it against me if I can’t remember. But the main thing is that I really liked it, so much so that when the band came to town I went to see them, even though this was the only album I knew, and very little of the Scorpions’ output. And I really enjoyed it.

Of course, being the naive young kid I was at the time, I assumed that because it was the Michael Schenker Group that that was him singing, when of course it isn’t. Schenker was and is known for his expertise on the guitar, and here he does not disappoint, also participating in the writing of all but one of the tracks. There are only eight in all, but there are some really great ones.

With the rather unnecessary and perhaps rhetorical question in the title of the opener, “Are you ready to rock” starts us off with that trademark Schenker sound on the guitar, the late lamented Cozy Powell making his mark behind the drumkit. The song thunders along on rails of iron, giving the effect of a locomotive gathering speed as it heads off on its journey, and vocalist Gary Barden’s voice is a mixture of Heavy Metal and AOR, as we pile inot “Attack of the mad axeman”, which not surprisingly begins with a screaming solo from Schenker before Powell brings the beat, carrying the tune in a sort of blues/boogie style. Barden’s voice is slightly altered, almost as if filtered through something, but I think it’s just a sign of his versatility that he can achieve this.

To be honest, this is one of the tracks I liked least on the album. It’s quite catchy, almost too much so, and has a rather incongruous slow section in the middle, wherein rhythm guitarist Paul Raymond gets to display his prowess on the keys too, but Barden’s falsetto vocal is almost comical, especially given the harder-than-hard title of the track. Thankfully, Schenker rescues it at the end with a blazing solo that more or less takes it to its conclusion. Even the ending can’t really save the song though, and I found it quite disappointing and underwhelming. Not so “On and on”, which again affords Raymond the chance to fire up his synth in a faux gentle passage that introduces the track before Schenker’s guitar comes through slowly but surely and the song takes off in a very Rainbow/Dio vein.

The chorus sees Barden return to the slightly annoying falsetto, but this is offset by some lovely harpsichordical piano from Paul Raymond. There were probably never going to be any hit singles from this album, but if they chose to release one this would have been my pick. Sadly, they just went with the opening track which, good as it is, is not single material and certainly no candidate for radio airplay. Still, the album did get into the top twenty in the UK, no mean feat for a Metal album, even in the heady days of the NWOBHM. The only track on which all five members of the band collaborate, “Let sleeping dogs lie” has a marching beat, subtle AOR flavour to it and some fine basswork from Chris Glenn. It’s a bit of a Texas strut sort of song, touches of early ZZ about it, and Raymond’s keyboards add a lot to it.

Barden is also in fine vocal form here, with Powell restricting himself to a pretty basic beat which nevertheless drives the song along. Any song, any album, any band was nothing if not enhanced by the presence of one of the greatest rock drummers the world has ever known. Superb solo from Schenker as ever, but I feel the song is let down a little by the unimaginative chorus. It’s more of a vehicle for the man whose name the band bears than really “Attack of the mad axeman” should have been, and the album is really just getting into its stride now as we reach one of the standouts.

Another opportunity for Raymond to flex his muscles on the keys, “But I want more” has a very classical, dramatic opening that runs for over a minute before Schenker and Powell kick it up and prove that it’s possible to write an AOR song that still fits really well into the Heavy Metal sphere. It’s almost three songs in one, with the atmospheric intro, the guitar-led first verse and then the straightahead rock of the rest of it, on which Barden really excels. It’s also the longest on the album, just shy of seven minutes. Smooth and emotional solo that would bring tears to the eyes of the late Gary Moore, and very much in his style, just completes a really excellent track.

The only ballad on the album, and the only track written solo by Paul Raymond, it’s not surprising that “Never trust a stranger” is heavily piano-oriented, but it is a powerful, emotional song, and another of my favourites with a superb hook in the chorus. It’s certainly nice to hear the piano when up to now all we’ve heard is synth, but of course you would not expect Schenker to allow himself to be left out, and so we get a blistering and very expressive solo from the man. We’re back rocking then with “Looking for love” --- which you’d kind of expect to have been the ballad, but there you go --- which bops along really well even if it is a little on the poppy side of things. A great solo at the end by Schenker tries to inject some rock fire into the song, and mostly succeeds, but it’s still a tad weak. But if my memory serves me --- and it’s been decades since I last listened to this album --- I believe it closes very badly.

“Secondary motion” starts out with a crying guitar then picks up a little with a nice hard rock groove, with a kind of Bryan Adams/Def Leppard feel to it, nice upbeat piano from Raymond and some solid drumming from Powell. Of course Schenker rocks it as ever, but I’m just left with a vague feeling that they stuck this on at the end, weren’t too bothered. I would have finished on “Looking for love” personally.

TRACKLISTING

1. Are you ready to rock?
2. Attack of the mad axeman
3. On and on
4. Let sleeping dogs lie
5. But I want more
6. Never trust a stranger
7. Looking for love
8. Secondary motion

Michael Schenker built up a massive reputation for himself, first in UFO then the Scorpions and finally as a solo aritste in his own right. Although I enjoyed this album I somehow never felt the need to explore his, or their, catalogue any further. I think the point is I liked it, but I didn’t love it. Nevertheless, listening back to it now I can see why I was impressed at the time. It’s not too long nor too short, has just the one ballad and plenty of guitar, and as I mentioned earlier, at the time I really thought to myself “Wow! That Michael Schenker is one hell of a singer too!”

What a dweeb!

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Unknown Soldier

I thought you wouldn't like the Mastodon album, they must be one of the most boring metal bands around, but most people would have you believe they're not.

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Metal Wars

Power Metal

Pounding Decibels- A Hard and Heavy History

Trollheart

No look at Brazilian Metal would of course be complete without checking out perhaps the biggest band to come out of there, and while I have reviewed one of their albums before, in the original Metal Month (anyone who calls it Metal Month I is going to receive a visit from me and my baseball bat!), I was told I had chosen possibly the worst example of their work. So I've researched a little further and I'm told this album, their fifth, broke the somewhat stale thrash rut they had been in for seven years and put them on a more experimental footing. This may of course turn out to be another mistake on my part, but hey, you can't please everyone and the title looks cool, so let's get into it.


Chaos AD --- Sepultura --- 1993 (Roadrunner)

With a heavy tribal-style percussion intro, “Refuse/resist!” opens the album and straight away betrays the band's leaning towards politically-charged lyrics, with a heavy snarling guitar and Max Cavalera hoarsely shouting the vocal almost, before the song kicks into high gear on the twin guitars of Andreas Kisser and Max himself. It then slows down again but picks up for the ending, taking us into “Territory”, a song about the Israeli/Palestinian conflict (particularly relevant at the time of writing) with an angry vocal from Max and a slow, grinding feel to the melody, a sort of appropriately militaristic, marching rhythm. “Slave new world” is kicked off by a big guitar riff then hurtles along, um, well, it sort of starts fast, slows down to a crunching grind, speeds up again --- you know how these things go.

I'm not exactly sure if Max is placing himself in the persona of Jesus when he sings ”Forgive me father/Forgive me God” and ”In the name of God/ I'm the chosen one” but “Amen” seems to concern the Last Day (popular subject with Thrash bands, it would seem). Note: reading back, I see now that it's actually about the Waco, Texas siege and the “chosen one” is David Koresh. Things get really interesting though when we reach “Kaoiwas”. Apparently inspired by the story of a Brazilian native tribe who committed mass suicide as a protest against the government taking their lands (that'll show 'em, huh? ) it's an acoustic instrumental, which for the first minute is almost silence, then native-style percussion cuts in and guitar comes in too. This is where Sepultura show they're more than just a Thrash Metal band, that they can make other types of music too. Very impressive, and must have confused the hell out of their fans.

Things soon get back to normal though with “Propaganda” as the heavy guitar riffs slam out of Kisser and Igor's drumming batters down the studio like the approach of a German bomber squadron. Max called in the help of ex-Dead Kennedys and Guantanamo School of Medicine man Jello Biafra to write “Biotech is Godzilla”, another hard-hitting song about weaponised bacteria or something. It's a bit mad really, but quite short and piles into “Nomad”, another punching, crunching song which has to do with people being exiled from their homeland. “We who are not as others” has almost half its four-minute length taken up with a big, ponderous, growling guitar before Max snarls in with the vocal, basically just the title of the song. He chants this repeatedly as the song heads towards its conclusion, and it's either a lazy lyric or a masterclass in minimalism, you decide.

Flying along at top speed, “Manifest” returns the guys somewhat to their traditional thrash roots, but there's a personal connection there for Max, as it commemorates the massacre of over a hundred prisoners in a Sao Paulo jail, which his friend photographed. There's a cover version of “The hunt” by New Model Army next. I don't know them much at all, so can't say whether or not it's a good version, but it's a pretty decent song, almost incongruous among the harder, thrashier material Sepultura do, and they handle it well I think. The album then closes on “Clenched fist”, with a sort of industrial metal opening, echoing and hammering before it drops into a dark guitar groove and marches along proudly, defiantly, a fitting closer to the album.

TRACKLISTING

Refuse/resist
Territory
Slave new world
Amen
Kaoiwas
Propaganda
Biotech is Godzilla
Nomad
We who are not as others
Manifest
The hunt
Clenched fist

I don't honestly know enough about this band to say whether or not this album sounds all that different to the previous ones, or even whether or not they continued this evolution away from the pure thrash they had made their name on. It's certainly different to “Dante XII”, but how much is “Chaos AD” a step towards that later sound? You'd have to ask someone who knows more about the history and music of Sepultura.

But this was not a bad album, which is about as much as I can say about it with my limited knowledge of a band who are generally accepted as one of the biggest metal bands in Brazil, if not the biggest.

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Isbjørn

I've only heard their two most recent ones, and I didn't even give them all that much attention, so I couldn't name any of the tracks on either album if someone asked me. I just remember being bored while listening to them. Same goes for the Tool albums I've heard. Hyped snoozefests.

EDIT: Now I feel kinda bad for suggesting Tool to Trollheart. Well, he's a proghead, so he might dig them, but they bore me and their albums are ridiculously long.

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Unknown Soldier

Don't much care for Tool really (a band for trendy metal listeners)

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Metal Wars

Power Metal

Pounding Decibels- A Hard and Heavy History

Trollheart

Members' Top Ten Metal Albums Lists
It’s time to take a quick look at some of the albums rated so highly by members here that they put them in their alltime top ten Metal albums list. As explained, before I started Metal Month II I received about ten of these, but as it was obviously impossible for me to listen to all of them I chose three, and this is the first of those choices.

I have no wish to downplay anyone’s ideas of what a good album is, or to rain on anyone’s choices, but given how much I have to listen to, how much time I have and the quite high possibility that many of these albums won’t chime with me, I’m going to listen to each once and then make some very short and basic comments on each which reflects my opinion only. You may think Godflesh is a great band or that some obscure German thrashcore album is the best ever made. You’re of course entitled to that opinion. I may not think the same. This does not mean I am dissing or denigrating your choice(s), merely voicing my own opinion on admittedly only one listen. As Francis Urquhart remarked: “You may very well think that; I could not possibly comment”.

So please, no wounded feelings or cries of outrage if my opinion differs from yours. And in all likelihood, in many of these choices, it will. Significantly.

So on with the first top ten list, which comes from


Janszoon was in fact one of the first to post a list (Goofle was the first: sorry yours didn’t get chosen) and I can see right away he has, as you would expect, some albums I have never heard of -- some bands I have never heard of! --- but perhaps surprisingly, on his list are two albums that not only have I heard of, but that I have heard, and reviewed! But let’s go in ascending order, beginning with his number
10.


Elvenfris --- Lykathea Aflame --- 2000

Oh Jansz! How could you? Grindcore? My most hated of all subgenres of Metal. Sigh. Well, a little about this band. They’re from the Czech Republic, have been around since 1997 when they were known as Appalling Spawn, under which name they released one album in 1999. But this is their only release under the new name, so it would seem both their debut and their swan song.

It seems to have those most horrible of death growls, the ones that don’t even sound human --- do they call them “Cookie Monster” vocals? --- anyway I hate them. The music does nothing for me either, but this is Janszoon’s choice so I’ll just sit here and take it till this eleven-track behemoth ends. To be fair, there are some unexpectedly melodic moments, like in “Bringer of Elvenfris flame”, but they’re few and far between and usually battered aside by hammerpunch guitar and suicidal drums, with a big helping of “Your-soul-is-damned” vocals, so nothing there for me to hang my bra on I’m afraid.

Well now hold on a moment. They seem to have gone all kind of proggy with “Flowering entities”, not quite as br00tal as the previous tracks. Can’t say I like it per se, but I hate it less than the three that have gone before, so that’s a step in the right direction. Hey! The vocals are even discernible here! I actually find myself grooving to “On the way home” --- until Cookie comes in that is. Um, hold on: the song faded? A grindcore song faded? I didn’t even think they knew how to do that? I thought any producer who faded out a grindcore song was automatically crucified and made to listen to Justin Bieber on random repeat?

Wow. Now “Shrine of consolation” has a decent, understandable vocal. I guess I possibly like maybe 5% of this album, which is 5% more than I thought I would. Wouldn’t listen to it again though. Almost orchestral work on “Sadness and strength”, some eastern melodies too. Sitar? Some nice melody in “A step closer”: it even slows down! No, I am not making a sick joke! AND it FADES! An eleven-minute instrumental ends the album, so at least I won’t have to suffer those vocals. This is utterly beautiful, and the only one I could say I like --- love --- all the way through. A real surprise, and a stunning closer.

Where I can, I’ll be listing favourite tracks, but there’s just the one complete track I like on this, even if parts of some of them weren’t as bad as I expected them to be. That track is the closing one, “Walking in the garden of Ma’at”. Nevertheless, the album wasn’t quite the ordeal I had anticipated, so perhaps you’d be so good as to hand me back my bra now? No, that one, to the left. The blue lacy one. Yeah. Thanks.

And so we move on to number
9
And another grindcore band. You know, I may have learned a little from the previous choice not to judge a book by its cover, but the tiny Wiki page on these guys says that their music was used to torture a prisoner in the series “Homeland”, so I’m not holding out too much hope.

Amber gray --- Gridlink --- 2008

Nope, nothing here. Just noise, screams and more noise. At least the previous band had some --- compared to this lot, a whole pile of --- melody and some passages, even one full song I could enjoy. This is just torture, which is why I can see why they used it in the abovementioned show. Play this to me at full volume and you could have anything you want. Even hardcore Islamic terrorists couldn’t hold up to this. The only blessing is that none of the songs last over a minute almost, many less than that, so although there are eleven tracks they will soon all be played and I can get on to the next selection. Sorry Jansz but this is awful!

But thank the Metal Gods it’s all over in a few minutes and I can put this behind me, try to sleep at night…

So what have you for us next, Jansz? At number
8
we find

Blackjazz --- Shining --- 2010

This one was not easy to track down. Not only are there several bands called Shining, there are two Metal bands named shining. Two Scandinavian metal bands! Anyway, we got there eventually and so this is an album by avant-garde metal/jazz fusion/experimental/Whatever-you’re-having-yerself band Shining, their fifth album. Now I have made no secret of my lack of love for jazz, and I have a tentative at best relationship with experimental music of any stripe, so this could be a banana skin (like I’m not already flat on my back and struggling for breath after Gridlink!) but we’ll see.

Oddly, of the eight tracks on show here, there are duplicates of two, albeit with differing lengths. This album is meant to mix extreme metal and jazz, and maybe it does: it’s certainly fast enough for the former and freeform enough (and annoying, to me, enough) for the latter, but it’s not for me. Again. Screechy, screamed vocals, blindingly fast guitars and too many horns, with no real melody I can ascertain. Meh. Frownland and bob probably love this. Sort of a Waitsish whispered vocal in “Fisheye”, which is a little better and “Exit sun” is a lot better --- well, for about half of it, till they start experimenting again. Even so, it’s the best I’ve heard on this album so far.

And that’s about it. The rest is, as I feared, mostly those annoying high-pitched horns I hate and a lot of other stuff jumbled together. Even the cover of Crimson’s “21st century schizoid man” can’t pull this album back from the brink for me. Not meaning to be dismissive; I’m sure this album is very close to Janszoon’s heart --- after all, it’s in his top ten --- and surely lots of others would enjoy and praise it. I’m just never going to be among them.

More of Jansz's list tomorrow! God help me...

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Trollheart: Signature-free since April 2018

The Batlord

About Sepultura

I'm surprised you didn't hate it. And it's definitely different to their early material. I suppose the closest thing you might be familiar with is Death. They were definitely an eighties death metal/thrash metal band. With that album they took on some Pantera influences, but I think it's overlooked how much, at the time, modern hardcore was there too. It's really not a million miles away from a band like Madball, or even Hatebreed.

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Isbjørn

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