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Speaking of when worlds collide, time to take our final look at the weird hybrid children that emerge when, often against all reason and sanity, and for reasons best known to the artistes that decide to,
METAL GOES

Glam metal of course would be another subgenre that would eat this kind of thing up. After all, it's not a million miles away from pop, and is kind of often looked on as the pop of metal. No surprise then that glam metal band The Poodles from Sweden would tackle a pop song on their very first album. Perhaps more of a surprise as to which one they went for.

“Dancing with tears in my eyes” by The Poodles, from the album Metal Will Stand Tall, 2006.
Originally by Ultravox, from the album Lament, 1984.
Written by Midge Ure, Chris Cross, Warren Cann and Billy Currie.

Ultravox certainly hit it big in the early eighties with songs like “The Voice”, “Reap the wild wind” and of course “Vienna”, which was a number one smash for them and became their signature tune. I'd have loved to have heard a glam metal take on that, but instead they've gone for the more pumping, uptempo song from Ultravox's seventh album, twenty-two years after it was originally released.

Naturally it's guitar driven, rawer and punchier, losing a lot of the smoothness and class of the original, though they do have piano on it. Perhaps not as prominent as it should be. Okay version but nothing special.

You wouldn't expect to see Cradle of Filth aligned with anything pop, but there again you go. Guess even the darkest of us can have the odd light moment, and in 2006 Dani decided what the hell and recorded a cover of one of the hits of 1983, one of the few for this band it must be said.

“Temptation” by Cradle of Filth, from the album Thornography, 2006.
Originally by Heaven 17 from the album The Luxury Gap, 1983.
Written by Glenn Gregory, Ian Craig Marsh and Martyn Ware.

Never a huge fan of Heaven 17 --- well, let's be honest: I was a rocker; I thought all bands like this were what my mate Jim called “puff bands”, and I didn't give them the time of day --- though it is interesting now (didn't know it at the time) that backing vocals were provided for this by Carol Kenyon, who has worked with people like Pet Shop Boys, Go West, Duran Duran, Tears For Fears and even Floyd! It will be interesting to see what Cradle of Filth did with it, especially considering they did not have the inestimable talents of Ms. Kenyon to rely on, as much of the song, as I remember it, rides on her orgasmic shriek in the chorus.

Oh this is good! Dani's trademark sinister rasp opens the song, with sort of dark, echoey drums and then heavy guitar, with a dark growl repeating the “Temptation”, and they use the vocal talents of rock singer Dirty Harry, who while she is no Carol Kenyon, adds a female snarl to the vocal. Definitely one of the best covers I've come across yet. Darkens up a song that is sort of dark in the first place, but takes it to another whole level.

And keeping with the more extreme side of metal, let's have a look at what happens when a metalcore/melodic death metal band takes on one of the coolest, most laidback of the rap hits of the 80s.

“Gangsta's Paradise” by Artas, from the album The Healing, 2008.
Originally by Coolio from the album Gangsta's Paradise and also the Dangeous Minds OST, both 1995.
Written by Stevie Wonder, Coolio, Doug Rasheed and Larry Sanders

This is the first I've heard of a metal band covering a rap song, and certainly the first metalcore cover, so I imagine this is going to be interesting. I know nothing of Artas, but they seem to have released two albums since 2008, this being their debut, and they come from Austria. Coolio, of course, made this song famous on the framework of “Pastime Paradise” by Stevie Wonder, which is I guess why Wonder has a writing credit for it.

Well it certainly hammers along, not even recognisable at the start, then a death vocal which again bears little resemblance to the original song. Very harsh, very raw, very ragged. Okay I can make out the chorus, and it becomes a little more familiar for a while, but it's played at such speed and with such ferocity and anger that it's hard to make out much of it. Be interesting to see again how the middle eighth plays out. Okay well he just shouts it but the guitar is pared right back, so you can make it out okay. Chaotic but pretty good overall.

Back to power metal we go. They seem to cover these pop songs the best, and Iron Savior are another band who took a shot at a classic pop tune, in this case one made popular by Seal. No, not that one!

“Crazy” by Iron Savior, from the album Condition Red, 2002.
Originally by Seal, from the album Seal, 1991.
Written by Seal and Guy Sigsworth.

This is a song I know well. Not a huge fan, again, of Seal but I do like some of his work. This of course was a massive hit for him and covered many times, but I wonder if it was ever given exactly this type of treatment before?

Guitar replaces synth with a rocking opening, a decent vocal that doesn't change the song too much. Keeps the basic funk element with the bass, good group vocal chorus. The expected guitar solo of course, fades out which I would have preferred not to have happened, but overall yeah, a decent cover.

Time to head to Hungary – what? Yeah, Hungary, where a band who go by the name of Nevergreen have been quietly churning out albums since 1994, and then in 2009, on their eighth album, did this.

“Frozen” by Nevergreen, from the album Új birodalom or New Empire, 2009.
Originally by Madonna, from the album Ray of Light, 1998.
Written by Madonna and Patrick Leonard.

This one could be interesting. Up until 2004 Nevergreen's albums and lyrics were all in Hungarian, although even back as far as 2002's Ezer világ őre they were covering pop songs, with Depeche Mode's “Strange love” and in 2007 they took a stab at Black's one-hit-wonder “Wonderful life” on Erős Mint A Halál (Strong as Death), so they have some experience with pop music covers.

Very orchestral, dramatic keyboard motif leading the song, and the vocal is dark but not too growly, then guitars cut in and again although I'm not too familiar with the original I think they do a good job, departing just enough from Madonna's version to differentiate theirs from it.

Strange name for a band, possibly hard to Google if you look for it as it's stylised, but To/Die/For from Finland also tapped into the trend for covering pop songs in 2003, taking one of, if not the best known songs from The Cutting Crew, if not my own personal favourite. I'm more a “I've been in love before” guy personally. But they went for the bigger hit, not that surprisingly.

“I just died in your arms tonight” by To/Die/For, from the album Jaded, 2003.
Originally by Cutting Crew, from the album Broadcast, 1986.
Written by Nick Van Eede.


Starts with that familiar keyboard arpeggio, gets a bit heavier and they change the lyric very slightly, but then the heaviness kind of slips away and it's very much a pop song again. In fact, I'd say Van Eede puts more passion into his version than the singer does here. Kind of weak really. Good enough guitar solo, but they could have amped it up a little. Hug? More like shrug.

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Our final band then, before we depart the shores of Syria, is categorised simply as “Heavy Metal”. They have two albums, but I can only find one on GPM. I guess I'm lucky to find any! So this will be our last taste of Syrian metal.

Resurrection of the Horrid Dream --- The Hourglass --- 2007 (Independent)

Opening with a nice screechy guitar and a tolling bell, “Resurrection” is a short song, shortest on the album at just over two minutes, almost completely instrumental bar some lines spoken sotto voce behind the music. This more or less acts as an introduction to the album, and it certainly gets my hopes up. Sounds very professional, well played and produced, and Rawed Abdel Massih (whom we shall perhaps undeservingly refer to as RAM in future) knows what he's about on those frets. Behind the skins sits Jerod, and not part of the band but guesting we have keyboards from Nareg. Vocals are handled by Bassem Deaibess, who has a strong and very clear voice, and thankfully sings in English. “Selective memory” trips along really nicely, but I can't help making the obvious Maiden comparison; you can be sure they number Harris and the lads in their influences.

Now I have to say that “Suicidal form” opens exactly, and I mean exactly, like a Maiden song. Can't remember which one, can't place it but that rippling guitar, the tone, the melody --- might be “Back in the Village”, not sure but it's definitely almost completely ripped off from one their songs, and it doesn't help that when Bassem begins singing you would swear you're listening to Dickinson. Even the screams are there. It's one thing to pay homage to your heroes or emulate them, but this is virtual copying. Hard to judge the music on its own merits with so much copycatting going on, but I'll give it a go. It's a good hard rocking song, trundles along nicely on the growling guitar riff from RAM; the only thing I will say is that he makes the twin guitar sound of Maiden all on his own, and while I'm sure much of this is mutiltracked it's still quite impressive for one guy. I think “The Book” is taking a critical look at Christianity (not surprising from an Arab country) but again it has way too much Maiden in it. Bassem handles the vocal well, and there are perhaps too many quotes from the Bible in the lyric (lazy songwriting, I feel) but overall it's got a nice kind of doomy vibe to it. Some of the actual lyric is terrible – ”We rule by the Book/ With a chain and a hook/ We stone and we maim/ All for His name.” Oh dear. RAM gets off a very fine solo near the end, and in fairness it doesn't feel like the six minutes it runs to.

“Distortion of thought “ does at least have a bit more originality and individuality about it, decent uptempo track though since the opener we haven't heard yer man on the keys and I think his contribution would lift this band a little more above the mediocre than they are at the moment. One of the epics then is “Ancient hope part two --- Kin traitor” (what happened to part one, I don't know), running for over eight minutes. Starts off very rocky then slows down with what may be dark synth keys from Nafel around the third minute, after which it slips into a dark, slow, doomy groove with a spoken vocal from Bassem. A really good solo followed by some Spanish guitar before it all ends on a dark spoken vocal with some atmopsheric guitar from RAM.

My copy of “East of the Mediterranean” seems to be corrupted, unless they're throwing in some freestlye scratching, which seems very unlikely. No, I reckon it's damaged, and for the first minute or so it pops and jumps and hops all over the place. It does settle down though and it's a decent thrash metal number with some fine drumming and great shredding, then it seems like “Divine judgement” may be a fast-paced instrumental, but more than halfway through the vocal comes in, spoken again against ringing guitar. But it is basically an instrumental, and not bad: has real teeth. Finally we get to hear those oh-so-missed keyboards as Narleg introduces “Alone again” on a melancholy, sweeping synth line with what sounds like violin but is I think synth. It kicks up for a moment then slows down again; whether I'd call this a ballad or not I don't know, but it's very “Strange world”...

This is the other epic, and at nine minutes plus change it does give you your money's worth, with some fine solos, good instrumental breaks, changes in tempo and time signatures and a pretty decent song overall. It also doesn't drag, which is good. The closer then is basically the title track, and “The horrid dream” opens with a big growling guitar and thick dark synth which takes us into the third minute of the seven the track runs for. Then there's more than a minute of blank silence before a thick bass either restarts the song or introduces a hidden track, but whichever, the production is suddenly awful. I can barely hear the singing at all, and the music is very fuzzy too. It's something of a letdown for a track that ends the album, and makes it seem as if this is to be continued in the next album (whcih so far has not materialised). Poor.

TRACKLISTING

1. Resurrection
2. Selective memory
3. Suicidal form
4. The Book
5. Distortion of thought
6. Ancient hope part 2: Kin traitor
7. East of the Mediterranean
8. Divine judgement
9. Alone again
10. The horrid dream

To be honest, if I hadn't already heard Iron Maiden, Metallica, Helloween and a hundred other bands I might think these guys were something special, and to be fair, I think they do have something. But there's too much of other bands in here. Talk about being derivative! They're trying too hard to sound, it would seem, like their western counterparts and while they do appear to have the talent to do that, if they want to rise above the crowd then they need to have their own sound, not coast along on someone else's.

Within the core sound of The Hourglass is an interesting mix of ideas and music, trying desperately to get out, but until they can create their own identity they're always going to be seen as a sub-Maiden/Priest ripoff band. Whether they ditch this label is something they are going to have to decide, assuming they're still together.

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Staying with The Simpsons for now, and indeed with season three, we had another metal guest show their faces, this time in Moe's Tavern. Aw, you know who I'm talkin' about!

“Flaming Moe's” featured our favourite bartender discovering that Homer, against all odds, had come up with formula for an irresistible alcoholic drink, and stealing the recipe from him. On the basis of his being the only place you can now get a “Flaming Moe” (originally of course a “Flaming Homer”) the tavern becomes THE place to go, and stars and A-list celebrities begin to patronise it. Among them are Aerosmith, who have to be coaxed up on stage by Moe, enticed by the promise of “free pickled eggs”!

They of course launch into “Walk this way”, after Steven has mistaken Springfield for St. Louis, and then at the height of the chorus invite Moe up to duet. An interesting touch is that, at this moment (for reasons which escape me right now) Homer is making his way through the vents or something, and he pushes a vent cover away at approximately the same time Tyler, in the video, smashes through the wall of the studio with his mike and leans into the other studio where Run DMC are rehearsing the same song. Not sure if it was meant to refer back, but if so, it's clever.

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And so to July, the best month of the year because it was the month that the momentous event of my birth was visited upon the world! So who released albums in this month, and is worth checking out? Anyone I know? Not really. So let's try these guys.

Hammer of the Witches --- Cradle of Filth --- 2015 (Nuclear Blast)

Introduction: I know very little about this band, beyond having heard their name, but I am intrigued to see that two of the band members' surnames are Filth (whether that's real or contrived I don't know). This is their eleventh album and features a new female singer with the brilliant name of Lindsay Schoolcraft!

Track-by-track

1. Walpurigs Eve: Which is I believe the night of the witches, when they all dance around and worship whatever. Good medieval style intro, short track, instrumental with violins, cellos, piano and a sort of vocal chorus , very dramatic and builds to
2. Yours immortally: Where the album really gets going with a breakneck guitar and hammering drums, the vocal a sort of shriek with another one growling, and it's all very heavy and extreme, making the likes of Motorhead look dull and plodding by comparison. Not much to recommend here I'm afraid. The guitar work is excellent and there's some nice orchestration; it gets a bit better towards the end, and Lindsay seems to make her first vocal contribution.
3. Enshrined in crematoria: A little bit grindier, then it kicks up in speed again. Basically more of the same I feel. Yeah, didn't get anything from that.
4. Deflowering the maidenhead, displeasuring the goddess: Now there's a long title! Good orchestral/keyboard intro with some nice guitar before it takes off into the stratosphere. Again some very good guitar, some of it quite melodic. I think this earns itself a Green.
5. Blackest magick in practice: Meh, it's okay but not anything that special.
6. The monstrous Sabbat (Summoning the coven): Now this is different. Very low-key, seems to be instrumental, I think that may be harp I'm hearing, plus orchestral backing. Like finding a fifty euro note among all your tenners. Lovely.
7. Hammer of the Witches: Big heavy marching tune, strident, arrogant, fearless, as the title would suggest. Very dramatic with great orchestration. Gets going then on punching guitar. Nice. Good turn by Lindsay Schoolgirl there on the vocals near the end. Lot of power as you would expect.
8. Right wing of the garden triptych: Oh look! She's taking lead vocals on this one. That's a nice change. Great cello work. Did I mention I love cellos? Some pretty good musical arrangements going on here, behind the growling vocals and shredding.
9. The vampyre at my side: This one is just all over the place. The vocals are so shrill it's almost like a screaming rant at times.
10. Onward Christian soldiers: I jsut can't get into this one at all, despite some really effective guitar melodies close to the end. It simply does nothing for me.
11. Blooding the hounds of Hell: Given the hard-as-fuck title, it's oddly got a lovely slow cello and violin intro, with steady, measured drumming and a church organ. Only just over two minutes and I assume an instrumental which closes the album almost as it opened.

Conclusion: It's the old problem. I never thought Cradle of Filth would be something I could get into, but you know, if it wasn't for those distracting mad vocals I could maybe give these guys a shot. There's certainly a lot of talent there, and a lot more melody than I had expected to find. Pretty impressed overall.

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Turbo had originally been planned as part of a two-album deal called Twin Turbo, with the more melodic, radio-friendly songs on the first album (which became Turbo itself) and the harder, rockier ones on the never-released other album. This turned out to be their next project, and if the above is to be believed we can hope for a much heavier record than we have just listened to.

Ram it down (1988)
This album would also be the last to feature longtime drummer Dave Holland, who would leave after recording it due to health problems. In fact, he was so sick that the band decided to use a drum machine for most of his parts, and so essentially he's not really on the album very much. It opens on the title track, with a big scream from Halford and immediately you know this is a whole new proposition: machinegun guitars, galloping drums, a hard, powerful vocal and the boys just going heads-down, kicking the album off in fine style. There's nothing AOR about this one! Great fretburning solos from the guys and if there's more than a hint of melody that could nod back to the previous album, then it's quickly shoved aside by the duelling axemen.

What song title says “heavy metal” like, um, “Heavy Metal”? As if anxious to prove they have not sold out, Priest reaffirm their heavy credentials and ascend to the top of the metal pile, kicking all before them down, as even at this point Iron Maiden are beginning to falter as Bruce Dickinson becomes increasingly disillusioned with the direction the band is taking, and makes ready to jump ship. Standing proud again at the summit, Priest beat their chests and challenge all comers. This song is heavy with a capital “h”! Sort of like a cross between Manowar and Kiss, with some classic Maiden thrown in. And Saxon. Powerful and anthemic.

If “Love zone” sounds like a ballad, it ain't. The tempo keeps high hard and heavy as the band race along, Halford at his highest-pitched, reminding me once again of Brian Johnson, the twin guitars growlign and spitting as they go. Everything about this album screams “We are not AOR! We are Heavy FUCKING Metal!”, with titles like “Hard as Iron”, “I'm a rocker”, the title of course and the next one, “Come and get it”, which just keeps pouring out the metal riffs and the sweat, blood and tears (of joy), an unstoppable force, a charging wild animal that ain't gonna be fazed by any poxy tranquiliser dart! Thundering along with “Hard as iron”, which would give Manowar and some Power Metal bands a run for their money. Whatever they did with the drum machine, I certainly don't hear a huge difference and it's not in any way obvious that this is not Dave Holland hitting the skins.

Smoke rises into the air as another searing solo sets the roof on fire, things finally slowing down for the atmospheric opening of “Blood red skies”, expressive acoustic guitar and what sounds like synth backing painting the scene, Halford coming down a few octaves vocally but still injecting as much passion into his singing as we've become used to. Of course then it ramps up with stuttering, slicing guitar and pounding percussion, the drama upping a level. This could very well be my favourite on the album, though it's hard to say as it's all really good. I like the progressive overtones on this while it still manages to be heavy as all hell. “I'm a rocker” keeps everything fast heavy and almost at a breakneck pace.

Then we get “Johnny B. Goode.” Okay, it's a classic but at this stage of their career I don't see why Priest need to be covering an old rock standard like this. They do it well, but it just seems totally out of place. Maybe it's just me. Anyway, “Love you to death” stomps all over the place with menace and dark desire. I know the guys at this point had ditched the leather-and-studs image, but this song just oozes a bondage motif, the guitars whipcracking as the bass bumps and grinds, Halford's throaty snarl above it all holding court with the twin guitars climaxing at .... you know what? Let's, um, let's just leave it at that, okay? A big echoey punch on the drums pulls in “Monsters of rock” and ensures we end on a crushing high, and if you weren't already bruised, battered and broken by this powerhouse of an album, this will roll right over you and pop any bones you may have left into dust. And you'll be grinning like an idiot when it rumbles away.

TRACKLISTING

1. Ram it down
2. Heavy metal
3. Love zone
4. Come and get it
5. Hard as iron
6. Blood red skies
7. I'm a rocker
8. Johnny B. Goode
9. Love you to death
10. Monsters of rock

Again, after a brief blip we have another superb Priest album. Maybe it's just every second one I should be listening to? If this had been released as a double with Turbo I think it would have sold very well indeed. As it is, this album for me cements the heavy metal gods tag attributed to Judas Priest, and shows them at the very top of their game. At a time when metal's elite were beginning to falter and fade on this side of the big water, Rob Halford was leading his men in a triumphant blood-fuelled charge up the hill, and planting the flag of Judas Priest there, where it would remain for some time.

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Let's do Violet's other album then.

An Overdose of Death --- Toxic Holocaust --- 2008 (Relapse Records)

A one-man outfit, Toxic Holocaust is Joel Grind (really!) and his music is described as “speed/thrash/black metal”, so this should be fun. Starts off with a face-melting guitar assault, vocals that are nearly as guttural as black metal ones but relatively intelligible, delivered in a much faster tempo than usually black ones are. Hmm. Don't think there are too many political allegories or social commentaries in these lyrics! Pretty straight forward, raw and unashamed. Interesting idea in “Nuke the cross”, of actually launching missiles against Heaven. Does the Patriot Mark V have that kind of range? You know, I was laughing at this initially but I'm sort of getting into the groove of it now. There's certainly melody in the music and it's good you can make out the vocals, which is not always the case with music of this kind. His lyrics aren't too bad either, you can see he put a lot of thought into them. “Endless Armageddon” is particularly good.

Lyrically, “Future shock” leaves a lot to be desired, but the music is pretty good; very heavy and aggressive with a really good guitar solo, while it's hard to judge “War game”, lasting as it does a mere fifty-nine seconds, but “In the name of science” has a good stab at things like (perhaps) the Nazi experiments in the concentration camps during World War II and has a good bouncing, grinding guitar line driving it. “March from Hell” really shows his struggling with the lyric: ”Legions of evil preparing to fight/ Kill the holy who come into sight/ Axes do battle, march from Hell/ Flames of evil attacking with spell” ... Um, yeah. And as for the last line --- ”As we kill and kill and kill and kill” --- what's wrong Joel? Could you not find anything to rhyme with “kill”? It's his step over into black metal territory, and it has a kind of endearing charm to it. I think it's that it's so completely predictable, it's almost like watching a child trying to write the Declaration of Independence in crayon. Ah, bless!

There's a real boogie hook to “Gravelord”, kind of reminds me of mid-seventies Sabbath, “Children of the grave”, that kind of thing, but “War is Hell” is just really a mess. To say nothing of his contention in the lyric that everyone will die, and then going on to talk about living in ashes? Make your mind up, man! Seriously. Still, he makes a better and stronger case against war than Edwin Starr did. I really like “Lord of the wasteland” though, with a really catchy guitar riff running through it, and that kind of groove follows through into “Feedback, blood and distortion”. If I had a problem with the lyrics it's that they generally all seem to follow the same idea --- war, apocalypse, armageddon, the ruin of Earth and so on --- and he reuses ideas so often that sometimes it's hard to know which track is playing unless you look down at the running order. Some variety would be nice. Also, I'm pretty sure that album sleeve is a close copy of Tank's Filth Hounds of Hades, which precedes this by about twenty-five years. See?


“Death from above” is another breakneck track, but it's all becoming a bit too much like the rest now and I'm getting bored. Surely Grind has more in his lyrical arsenal than these same tired, repeated, rewritten and reused phrases? “City of a million graves” has a little more originality but not so much that you notice really.

TRACKLISTING AND RATINGS

1. Wild dogs
2. Nuke the cross
3. Endless Armageddon
4. Future shock
5. War game
6. In the name of science
7. March from Hell
8. Gravelord
9. War is Hell
10. The Lord of the wasteland
11. Feedback, blood and distortion
12. Death from above
13. City of a million graves

Decent album, some good riffs and you can hear the vocals clearly which is a help, but the songs are so similar it's hard to tell one from the other. Not so much an overdose of death as an overdose of repetition.

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As already mentioned, Wpnfire chose Reign in Blood as his number six, so this is his choice for number five on his Members' Top Ten list.

I've heard these guys for the first time when I checked out their latest album for the “Freshly Forged” section, but the one Wpnfire has chosen is their debut, from a quarter of a century ago.

Lost Paradise --- Paradise Lost --- 1990

Compared to their last and most recent album, the only one I've heard before this, I hear a much harsher, death or even black metal influence on this, with darker, more guttural vocals and a faster rhythm in songs like “Deadly inner sense” and “Breeding fear”, while the title track has a slower, doomier feel with a real air of hopelessness. Some great guitar work here but it's hardly a fun listen: “Internal torment”. “Breeding fear.” Rotting misery.” Nice. Music to hang yourself to? All very grinding, punishing, dark and unremittingly sour. Not expecting too much in the way of ballads, then!

I do hear female vocals in “Breeding fear”, which come as something of a relief to be honest; listening to some guy snarl and growl about how pointless life is is not my idea of a good time. At least the title track is a decent instrumental, so for a few minutes I don't have to listen to yer man but we're soon back to it as we close on “Internal torment II” --- what happened to Internal torment I? Don't ask me --- and all in all I'm pretty relieved when I can turn this album off. Very depressing and little to point the way to the band they would later become, if their new one is any gauge.

at number four we have a three track album...

Variations On a Theme --- Om --- 2005

Kind of a raw, buzzy sound to the guitars, though the vocal is clear enough. Even so, six minutes into the twenty-one this runs for I'm pretty bored. It's like listening to someone chanting over a repeating guitar riff, neither of which are particularly interesting. “On the mountain at dawn”, that's called. Pity they didn't stay there! Still, be thankful for small mercies, as it's the longest track on the album of three. Mind you, the other two aren't exactly short, at twelve minutes each. Oh no! I just realised: variations on a theme? So are the other two going to be versions of this opening track? Dear god! That would mean in effect another twenty-four minutes of this mind-numbing boredom.

It's kind of hard to tell really. It's slower, but the droning vocal is just the same, no hint of emotion or interest, just like a mindless chanting; nothing there to interest me. And now we're onto the last track, which .... sounds at least a little different, with a kind of boogie beat. Just found out there is no guitar on this album, only bass and drums, so I have to give them kudos for that; I thought that was a downtuned guitar. Still boring as all hell though. Not my cup of poison at all, and if Sleep, whom I see are at the top of his list, are like this, then I'm going to be singularly unimpressed with them too.

And again he's chosen one I've reviewed last year for his number three --- Metallica's Master of Puppets --- so that only leaves two albums on his list, which we will tackle in the final part of his, and the Members' lists, soon.

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Metal Massacre III, released in 1983

Track one: “Aggressive protector” (Slayer)

Yeah, about that: Come on, everyone knows Slayer. And if you don't, then check out my review of their studio discography from last year's Metal Month.

The track: Again, it's well known as one of Slayer's first, found as a bonus track on their debut EP, Haunting the Chapel, 1984

So where are they now? Other than losing Jeff Hanneman to cirrhosis of the liver, Slayer are still one of the loudest, fastest and aggressive metal bands in the world. They recently released their twelfth album.

Track two: “Riding in thunder” (Bitch)

Yeah, about that: See volume I

The track: It's ok. Plods a little, hasn't got the same energy as “Live for the whip” on the first volume. Vocals are a little weaker.

So where are they now? Again, see volume I

Track three: “Tyrant” (Armageddon)

Yeah, about that: Another band who chose a nmae used by many other bands, some of which are American, so it's virtually impossible for me to find out any information about them, as all the bands bearing that name that I've come across have been, well, not this band.

The track: This has a lot of promise. Big slow blues-style grinder, with a hint of doom metal in it, and the vocalist is well suited to that sort of metal, mostly snarling the words out. Gorgeous little bassline there near the end, leading a smoking blues break to fade.

So where are they now? Could not tell you.

Track four: “Piranhas” (Medusa)

Yeah, about that: California band, chose another name that has been well used, even by a British NWOBHM band, which confused me at first. Released one EP and one demo.

The track: Short, fast and unremarkable. Meh.

So where are they now? Just a guess, but I expect they went their separate ways after failing to achieve fame and fortune.

Track five: “Bite the knife” (Test Pattern)

Yeah, about that: No information of any kind I'm afraid

The track: Now this is just brilliant! Old school, no-nonsense, heads down metal with a killer guitar solo. Sweet.

So where are they now? Probably disbanded, though I can't say for certain

Track six: “Blitzkrieg” (Black Widow)

Yeah, about that: Oddly, I thought I knew (of) this band, but there is nothing on them, other than a much later band called Black Widow USA, who are definitely not these guys.

The track: Powerful guitar assault in the Maiden/Helloween vein, seems to be an instrumental. Only the second we've had in this series so far.

So where are they now? Shrug.

Track seven: “Mrs Victoria” (Warlord)

Yeah, about that: See volume II

The track: Much better than the other track. Very progressive, has a great melody, strong vocals and some really nice keys. Crazy ending.

So where are they now? See volume II

Track eight: “Let's go all the way” (Virgin Steele)

Yeah, about that: Everyone knows who Virgin Steele are, right?

The track: Slightly retitled for the Guardians of the Flame album to “Go all the way”.

So where are they now? Still churning out superior power metal albums, with their thirteenth out this year.

Track nine: “Fire and wind” (Sexist)

Yeah, about that: Although not too much is known of them, they do seem to have had both Jake E. Lee and future GNR axeman Gilby Clarke in their ranks. Only released one demo but oddly this was not on it.

The track: Not bad at all. Some nice vocal harmonies, good heavy feel without being blisteringly fast or too aggressive. Twin guitars work well.

So where are they now? Changed their name to Letchen Grey, released one EP in 1986 and promptly buggered off.

Track ten: “Hell bent” (Znowhite)

Yeah, about that: The band who did so little to impress me last year on the “Don't listen to that --- listen to this!” section. In seven years together they only managed one solitary album before splitting up and becoming various other bands.

The track: The shortest track on any of the compilations so far, at one minute and forty-nine seconds. Also the fastest (yeah, even allowing for Slayer!); almost punk, as I think I remarked last year about their album.

So where are they now? Looks like they split up after their one album in 1987.

Track eleven: “The kid” (Marauder)

Yeah, about that: Nothing I can tell you really.

The track: Bit basic really, nothing special.

So where are they now? Dunno.

Track twelve: “Fist and chain” (La Mort)

Yeah, about that: Again, no information.

The track: It's all right. Powerful but nothing to write home about.

So where are they now? As a band? Gotta say, dead. Sorry.

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Wpnfire

I don't know where in the world you got that from, Hanneman died from liver failure.

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Trollheart

No, because everyone knows he is not trying to put forward a theory that golf is not a sport, just that he considers it less than his favourite, and so therefore "not sport". People do it all the time. "That's not a knife! THIS is a knife!"

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