Originally Posted by Chiomara

We should all be more like Batlord in that regard

Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien

There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.

Originally Posted by Chiomara

I still honestly don't know my orientation, and I hate that I even feel bothered by not knowing. (We should all be more like Batlord in that regard) And I know that sexual orientation and gender identity are separate things, but my occasional gender dysphoria always seems to coincide with my sexual orientation crises. (Part of it is definitely just my OCD acting up, but they're still intertwined for some reason) I've always resented being female-- the social conditioning, the abuse, feeling like nothing but a sex object at the ripe old age of 12 (which causes you to start viewing yourself through an objectifying lens as well), the exhausting performative femininity, and the passive aggressive punishments one receives when attempting to take a break from such behaviors-- and upon realizing I wasn't straight many moons ago, there was a great feeling of relief, but also a sense of loss upon realizing how much time I wasted and how much I tortured myself trying to be the feminine ideal in order to avoid the aforementioned social punishment & harassment that would surely be thrust upon me by the small minded lecherous gremlins that tend to run rampant in small southern towns. Not that I consider myself a victim-- I helped build my own prison, I accepted it-- I made myself small & grew ever smaller as I ignored my needs for years in order to build up others who ultimately used me/wanted a mother or a pet as opposed to an equal partner.

I don't know what point I was getting at, but, it seems that most people who feel "gender fluid" and/or experience some degree of gender dysphoria are LGBT. But a lot of people in the community feel that the identity of "nonbinary" (or "genderqueer") is in fact even more limiting than the existing gender identities, with just as many unspoken restrictive rules and pressures. Of course these things are unavoidable-- within lesbian communities, for instance, it's sometimes looked down upon for two butches to date each other, so, there's always going to be some degree of unfair judgment even within supposedly inclusive and open minded communities.

I wish it didn't matter. I wish there there wasn't a need to signal one's gayness or lack thereof/conform to yet another set of ever-changing rules within the preexisting set of rules that comes along with each gender; I wish one's self-worth did not hinge upon how well and convincingly they performed their gender/sexual orientation before their chosen social group, but it often does, and many so-called liberal places are unbearably judgey and filled with insufferable gatekeepers. With each passing day I feel more and more like an androgynous alien, and it stresses me out to wonder where I'd even belong in any given town's lgbt spaces. I leap back and forth between asexuality, bisexuality and repressed lesbianism. (Especially since all the lsd i took recently basically rearranged my brain and obliterated various parts of my persona) Since I live in the south, I can't really dress how I want without risking harassment or worse. (once, my ex gf and I had a record number of three bottles thrown at our head over the course of just one evening)

I don't know. Much of this agony (and the compulsive need to perform and identify as something) is just an inevitable part of living in a society; if all were to vanish and there was no audience-- just you, unfettered and an endless black desert & the ghosts of your disappointed ancestors or whatever-- I'm sure we'd all feel much less vexed over the whole thing and just be aimless deviants in peace, but alas.

Originally Posted by BassoonPlatoon

It doesn't matter if they are comparable. This isn't a contest. Everyone faces problems based on their identity and there shouldn't be any minimizing that.

Rape is a threat of violence, and it is extremely prevalent in the lives of "straight people". The issues may be different, but copping out like that and pretending that everybody doesn't face something is an injustice.

Originally Posted by wolverinewolfweiselpigeon

where's the STRAIGHT pride parade huh????

Originally Posted by Oriphiel

I really haven't talked with you all that much on this forum, but I have noticed that you're kind of awesome, and if others are so hung up on roles and expectations that they can't see that, then it's their ****ing loss.

Originally Posted by Oriphiel

Whether you ever want to put a label on your sexuality is completely up to you, but it's more important that you're mentally and physically in a place that you find fulfilling. That place might change over time, so it's not wrong to be a sexual nomad (great name for a psych rock band right there) rather than staying in one place for the benefit of someone else.

But, yeah, it'd probably help if you moved out of the deep south. I hear Canada has lots of poutine. And AYAOTD re-runs.

Originally Posted by Chiomara

Thanks. I tend to be a hermit anyway, so it's not as if I'd be in daily peril even if I allowed myself to dress like a flamboyant beacon of sin and do whatever (I'd probably need to move to New Orleans for that) -- the frustrating part is just the churning inner turmoil.

Originally Posted by The Batlord

Bruh, stick something up your ******* when you're jacking it and your toes will literally curl. The only problem is that you have to wash it off. But find me a girl with a strap-on or a beautiful transsexual with a nice dick and I'll spend my next few checks buying a wedding ring. A finger would be nice and all but give me butt play with some width, nawmsayin?

Homophobia isn't gonna end with straights realizing that gays are people too. They already know that. It'll end when they realize that wet friction of any kind can make them cum if they just chill the **** out. Make someone cum and they'll like you a lot more.

Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien

There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.

Originally Posted by Trollheart

Aw, poor cat. Ritchie went blind last year and within a few days had fallen from the top of the stairs - and I DON'T mean DOWN the stairs. He must have been walking towards the bannister and then suddenly he's in the air and dropping at an alarming rate to hit the telephone table hard. Poor guy. That was no life for him. He's in a better place now.

Fair play to your friend: I imagine looking after a blind cat is a fulltime job.