|
Register | Blogging | Today's Posts | Search |
|
Thread Tools | Display Modes |
08-12-2016, 03:26 PM | #1 (permalink) | ||
President spic
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Waxahatchee
Posts: 4,861
|
How To Be A Man
It's very easy. Here's a few quick steps.
1. Gotta get a house, a shitty apartment with a few other dudes. Sleep next to the furnace. 2. Get a dishwashing job. You'll get bare minimum wage, you'll do okay, and you learn to riff in the kitchen. And you can hang with the black guys and Puerto Ricans who will help you with your testosterone problem. 3. Get a motorcycle. Like I told Frown, nothing fancy, 50 cc's will do. 4. Stop giving blowjobs and start receiving them. You'll learn that it feels much better then handing them out. 5. Put on a nice flannel. And those are the steps. Good luck out there, gentleman.
__________________
Quote:
Quote:
|
||
08-12-2016, 04:34 PM | #4 (permalink) |
silky smooth
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Pangaea
Posts: 4,079
|
JTF awoke in a cold sweat. Not that nightmare again..., he thought. This was the third time this week. He began to wonder if they would ever end.
He lazily wandered into the kitchen of his studio apartment. Maybe I'll get a girl here someday...probably not though. Despite his pessimism, he knows that the only way to start his day is with a nice balanced breakfast of a half-eaten Egg McMuffin he found in the garbage cans over in the back alley. Why would someone throw this away? This shit's pure gold. After scarfing down the sandwich, he sat down at his only possession that costs more than twenty dollars: his windows 98 laptop. Time for some MusicBantering, the only activity in my day that keeps me sane. A quick glance at The Lounge forums shows a lack of high quality content. I know, I'll write an awesome post about being a man. Because I'm a man. And I know what it takes. So he got to work. After fourteen straight grueling hours of straining his brain he was finally finished with the greatest post of his life. God damn, if I send this to the White House maybe they'll be so impressed they'll make me president! He stood up and patted himself on the back for a hard day's work. No way I'll ever create content as high quality as that again. He was very tired from all that hard work and had a headache from straining his brain so much. He laid down in bed, rubbed one out because he can't get laid, and went to sleep. He had the nightmare about YorkeDaddy creating higher quality content than him again. Ugh, I thought the awesome post I made today would be the end of these nightmares...apparently I still suck.
__________________
http://cloudcover1.bandcamp.com/ http://daydreamsociety.bandcamp.com/ 9-Time Winner of MusicBanter's "Most Qualified to be a Moderator" Award |
08-12-2016, 04:50 PM | #5 (permalink) | |
Zum Henker Defätist!!
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Beating GNR at DDR and keying Axl's new car
Posts: 48,199
|
Our posts are supposed to have content?
__________________
Quote:
|
|
08-12-2016, 05:19 PM | #6 (permalink) | |
Account Disabled
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: In the fires of your own disillusion
Posts: 684
|
Quote:
|
|
08-12-2016, 10:15 PM | #8 (permalink) | |||
President spic
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Waxahatchee
Posts: 4,861
|
Quote:
__________________
Quote:
Quote:
|
|||
08-12-2016, 11:24 PM | #10 (permalink) | |
Music Addict
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 2,358
|
Quote:
|
|