adidasss

Oh sure but then there's the whole expectation to "commemorate it" in one way or another, even with a small group of friends, otherwise people might get upset or something and I just really dislike the idea of being the focus of attention in something like that.

I have problems, I know. :/

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“Think of what a paradise this world would be if men were kind and wise.” - Kurt Vonnegut, Cat's Cradle.

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Lisnaholic

Yep, a full wedding is so stressful for the main participants. I always respected my sister who flat out said: me, plus husband plus the 2 necessary witnesses, then straight down the pub afterwards.

Just one time I gave a Best Man's speech at a formal wedding, and in addition to Guybrush's advice I would say:-
i) sure, say no if it's too difficult for you
ii) if you decide to do it, (a) write the speech together with your neice, so the quality of the speech is not all on you, (b) keep it as short as decently possible, (c) remember that your audience will be well-disposed towards you. All they want is a little sentiment, a quick laugh, then carry on with their boozing.

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"Am I enjoying this moment? I know of it and perhaps that is enough." - Sybille Bedford, 1953

Trollheart

Yeah public speaking is hard. I'm terrible at it. One thing I might suggest (other than the suggestions already given, which are all good) is to write it in such a way that you can involve, read, direct the attention away from yourself and onto, other people. Example: "Blah blah blah and I remember how Tom - hey Tom! I see you sitting there squirming. You think I'm gonna tell them all about how you kept your teddy bear till you were 30, don't you? Oh I would never do that! Tom, everyone!" (Pause for nervous laughter, applause, catch your breath as the attention slowly swings back to you). "Now, Tom may have kept his bear but Sally, on the other hand..." and so on. Pushing the attention of the crowd to others (nearly wrote crows instead of crowd - hey! There's an idea! Release a murder of crows into the audience! That will take the attention off you and distract them while you make a hasty, pre-prepared escape!) might help relax you, and also eat up time.

Like I said, I suck at this.

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Trollheart: Signature-free since April 2018

BassoonPlatoon

I'm glad I don't have to do it anymore.
Everything else is already nerve wracking enough.

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Snowy owls bark like dogs.

Plankton

I spent yesterday with my daughter since she has to work tonight. Breakfast, Farmers Market, then just relaxing in the back yard at my friends with a few beverages and lots of laughter. It was a perfect day.

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The Batlord

Faint out of spite.

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jwb

damn dude that sounds scary af. Can you imagine all those people hanging on your every word at such a significant moment?

ribbons

Arrived back home a short while ago after a sad day at my sister’s house, commemorating my late brother-in-law on this first Father’s Day without him for my sister and nieces (my niece who is getting married, and my younger niece). It was an exhausting day – my sister is not doing well at all, and she and my niece who is getting married have been at odds with each other in their grief. My younger niece is shy and just sits there withdrawing into herself. She’s a lot like my brother-in-law who was a humble person and the peacemaker and glue that held his family together.

I just want to thank you so much, Marie, adidasss, Guybrush, Plank, Lisna, TH, for your really thoughtful posts and great advice, and even for making me laugh here and there (not an easy thing for me to do) about my public speaking dilemma. The subject of my speaking at the wedding reception did not come up at all today; but I know that my niece, her fiancé and I will need to discuss it again soon. Thank you all again for even caring to write – which means an awful lot to me right now.

ribbons

A bit of reverse psychology there, jwb? No, I definitely can't imagine all those people hanging on my every word - especially as we're talking a huge wedding with about 250 guests.

ribbons

A belated Happy Father's Day to you, Plank - so glad you had a great day with Hanna and your friends. And to the other Dads of the board: Happy Father's Day to Lisna, and to Guybrush (don't think it's technically Father's Day in Norway, but an honorary salute to you just the same), and to our man music_collector in Canada.