Damn, he's in the hospital today cause his ankle is swollen. Starting to think prayer does work.

Lmao

Follow up with some positive vibes.

It keeps changing. Swipe insert wait pull out quickly (not your favorite I know) hand it to the person do it yourself

I called in sick

I need another day just to ****ing think

The look of contempt on everyone when I pull one a these bad boys out:

https://i.imgur.com/oquVj3o.jpg?1

Message to everyone who works in a restaurant:

Never call in with anything except bad diarrhea and a 101 fever

I said I had a migraine they called back and said get your ass down here.

Jesus ****ing Christ

Lol what a rube.

Getcho lazy ass up and get to work.

Whadaya think this is, Anyhow?

Well duh, you have to make it sound like you absolutely should not be handling food