I wish my “crisis” was finally being able to afford a sports car.

I agree with you btw.

Let's be real though. Elph is totally gonna get wasted and then go for a ride just for fun. He does not need a motorcycle. He's just gonna end up Vince Neil'ing himself and a mother of two.

I get ahead on my motorbike
I get ahead on my motorbike
I feel so quick in my leather boots
I feel so quick in my leather boots
My mood is black when my jacket's on
My mood is black when my jacket's on
And I'm in love with myself
And I'm in love with myself
There's nothing else but me
There's nothing else but me
And an empty road
And a cool cool wind and it makes feel so good
Just like I knew it would
Just like I knew it would
I get so wild on my motorbike
I get so wild on my motorbike
I'm breaking loose on this moonlit night
I'm breaking loose on this moonlit night
I cut the road like a sharpened knife
I cut the road like a sharpened knife
And I'm in love with myself
And I'm in love with myself
There's nothing else but me
There's nothing else but me
And an empty road
And a cool cool wind makes me feel so good
I'm moving too fast, I'm moving too fast
I'm moving so fast that I can't control the wheels
I'm moving so fast, I'm moving so fast
Yeah, I'm going for a tree, yeah it's going for me, yeah
My head is dripping into my leather boots.

What if he crashes into a bus full of Nazis killing all involved. ****, quit jumping to the worst conclusions.

Maybe he can show some initiative and ram Ted Cruz off a bridge.

Nah man this is his road theme.

He's got them both on a looping playlist with this

^ That's elph to a T

Gotta have some Vince Neil in there.

Putting all this together with his fashion sense and newfound love of cowboy clothing I've come to the conclusion that Elph is trying to become the Undertaker.