^ Yeah. It's so bad it's good.

One time in a park I almost saw a dog playing a harpsichord. Unfortunately by the time I got up close, the dog was taking a pee-break against a tree and someone had stolen the harpsichord.

One time in a park I found a package of hot dogs. I might have been at the grocery store actually.

One time I met someone who almost owned a slave. Turns out it was her lover.

Reminds me of the time I met someone who was actually eating a hotdog. At one point he almost dropped it, though in the end he didn't.

Reminds me of the time I ate a wiener dog.

*dog's wiener

Isn't that every night?

If that's not the title of a country song, it should be.

I believe everything is the title of a country song, which is probably precisely the joke.

I think hip hop would like a word with you.

I think working for Oscar Meyer would be quite a fulfilling career.