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Old 11-30-2018, 05:33 PM   #58091 (permalink)
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Get a dog, man. My dog gives me comfort everyday. The only bad things about dogs is they get old and die too ****ing fast. It’s intense how you witness your own aging and death in dogs. Time has been ****ing me up this week. Death is so discomforting.
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Old 11-30-2018, 05:39 PM   #58092 (permalink)
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Old 11-30-2018, 05:40 PM   #58093 (permalink)
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One of the biggest mind ****s of being a human is routinely going back and forth between being scared of death and wishing for it.

I'm doing really good mentally this year, but I'm still sometimes thinking that's it would be kind of nice to just be done with it all for good.

Like you're intellectually aware that there's a lot of anguish to go with a little joy. At least in the larger scope of things, that's what it seems like.
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Old 11-30-2018, 05:45 PM   #58094 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by MicShazam View Post
I'm doing really good mentally this year, but I'm still sometimes thinking that's it would be kind of nice to just be done with it all for good.
I've never really been suicidal but I feel that way from time to time. Life's pretty exhausting and not doing that sounds pretty easy.
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Old 11-30-2018, 05:47 PM   #58095 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by Frownland View Post
Who the **** wrote that?

That’s ****ing brilliant!
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Old 11-30-2018, 05:47 PM   #58096 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by Frownland View Post
I've never really been suicidal but I feel that way from time to time. Life's pretty exhausting and not doing that sounds pretty easy.
I don't wanna make it sound like I'm contemplating suicide either. Just a feeling sometimes that life is, as you said, exhausting. Like I just want to close my eyes and sleep forever.

Then I snap out of it and move on. But it's a recurring thought.
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Old 11-30-2018, 05:56 PM   #58097 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MicShazam View Post
One of the biggest mind ****s of being a human is routinely going back and forth between being scared of death and wishing for it.

I'm doing really good mentally this year, but I'm still sometimes thinking that's it would be kind of nice to just be done with it all for good.

Like you're intellectually aware that there's a lot of anguish to go with a little joy. At least in the larger scope of things, that's what it seems like.
Good post



Quote:
Originally Posted by Frownland View Post
I've never really been suicidal but I feel that way from time to time. Life's pretty exhausting and not doing that sounds pretty easy.

Life gets more and more exhausting. You hit that half century and it’s like goddamn this one long ass crazy story.

I mean I know there’s no story arc but to me it feels sort of like I’m a character in a novel (probably by Tolstoy)

Very Bad Wizards did a show saying that some people are more inclined to the story arc version of themselves and others just accept the present as the only you that exists. I live like the latter but think like the former if that makes any sense.
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Old 11-30-2018, 06:00 PM   #58098 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by MicShazam View Post
I don't wanna make it sound like I'm contemplating suicide either. Just a feeling sometimes that life is, as you said, exhausting. Like I just want to close my eyes and sleep forever.

Then I snap out of it and move on. But it's a recurring thought.
Yeah

I want to discuss it with people but it always sounds suicidal

With me it’s like 60% ready to go 30% afraid of it 10% suicidal

***old man river***

Love that song

Quote:

tired of living but afraid of dying that old man river just keeps rolling along
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Old 11-30-2018, 06:03 PM   #58099 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by OccultHawk View Post
Yeah

I want to discuss it with people but it always sounds suicidal

With me it’s like 60% ready to go 30% afraid of it 10% suicidal

***old man river***

Love that song
That is a good song. Laugh if you want, but I love the way it was used in Joe vs the Volcano.
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Old 11-30-2018, 06:10 PM   #58100 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by OccultHawk View Post
Get a dog, man. My dog gives me comfort everyday. The only bad things about dogs is they get old and die too ****ing fast. It’s intense how you witness your own aging and death in dogs. Time has been ****ing me up this week. Death is so discomforting.
ATM we got sick cats in the house and having dogs wouldn't be fair to them, but in a few years perhaps.

Quote:
Originally Posted by MicShazam View Post
One of the biggest mind ****s of being a human is routinely going back and forth between being scared of death and wishing for it.

I'm doing really good mentally this year, but I'm still sometimes thinking that's it would be kind of nice to just be done with it all for good.

Like you're intellectually aware that there's a lot of anguish to go with a little joy. At least in the larger scope of things, that's what it seems like.
I often think about how nice it would be to not have to deal with all this **** but it doesn't stick. I like drinking, I like playing video games, I like listening to music, I like reading books, I like reading comic books, I like saying ****ty things to other people that makes them angry at me, and all of that legitimately makes me okay with living. I guess some people need to accomplish crazy things and be President of the United States but I just am okay with filling my day with silly things that make each day some kind of fun. It's not an inspiring life but it's my life and I'm willing to live it.

Some people might need to prove their worth to the human race with every day of their life but I am not one of those people and those people tend to commit genocide so who cares? All I do is listen to Venom and they (not Venom) murder Jews. What exactly am I doing wrong?

Quote:
Originally Posted by MicShazam View Post
I don't wanna make it sound like I'm contemplating suicide either. Just a feeling sometimes that life is, as you said, exhausting. Like I just want to close my eyes and sleep forever.

Then I snap out of it and move on. But it's a recurring thought.
Quote:
Originally Posted by OccultHawk View Post
Yeah

I want to discuss it with people but it always sounds suicidal

With me it’s like 60% ready to go 30% afraid of it 10% suicidal

***old man river***

Love that song
I'd love to not have to do this anymore but the thought of never doing anything anymore is the worst thought ever. I'll take whatever day comes to me so long as I'm not hooked up to an oxygen tank.
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