I feel this. I have points where I'll literally refuse to hangout with people because my anxiety makes me a complete mess. I apologize to my friends for having to deal with it, they say it's ok, but I know that it's not because even I get annoyed with myself. As far as depression goes, I've become so comfortable with it that I just don't give a ****. Life will be life whether I like it or not. That, and my motivation is at an all time low. All I do is work, go home, repeat. Some hangout in between but I'll refuse to go out friends if I can tell that the day is not going well for my own mental health.

sorry about you grandmother merit

Thank you to everyone for the condolences. And for everyone who is like "why are you on an internet message board when your granny just died?!," it's because she lived in a different town and her body is on its way to a different state to be cremated and buried, and I don't have transportation at the moment to go be with family, many of whom also live out of state.

I don’t think anyone was thinking that. It’s normal to carry on with your routines. It’s also normal not to. I don’t think anyone here is interested in being the grief police.

My grandma passed away a few years ago now and it's still something I think about. She was anorexic for a pretty good portion of her life so it was tough when she went. I of course went to the funeral. It was the first time I'd ever seen a post-life body. It was beautifully terrifying in a good way. She was a good person to and I imagine the same can be said for you. Sorry for your loss man. That can be tough especially if you guys were close.

It's just that sadness / death guilt because you're still alive and they aren't sinking in :(

I'm sorry for your loss. The last time that I went drinking at the local bar I met a mortician. He wanted me to write a book about his life and experiences.

i miss my grandmothers :o: ill see them this January hopefully. gotta work things out with the books for school but if they just had snapchat they could get a view into my daily life. i dont post everyday or all day but i do post as much as i can get a grab. then they would have to snapchat their life, to then we could both see each others life in different states. because its not possible for me to live in two states at one time. ive thought about that for a while now, having family 1000+ miles apart sucks a lot.

This may sound ridiculous but I am so ****ing sick of sunshine

Today was so boss it rained cool rain all day and I had off work so I could enjoy it

But now my phone weather app is like all next week sunshine still getting into the ****ing 80’s

I am not overstating this at all. I would love to never see sunshine again. ****ing hate direct sunlight. It’s driving me insane. Goddamn I hate Florida

What about those first days of spring when the leaves are so bright and green that they defy logic and the world feels happy?