My cousin walked into my store today while I was at work closing up. I haven't seen her in at least 5 years. Her and I were more like siblings when we were younger, she's kinda like the older sister I never had. Also reminded me that no matter how ****ing crazy I am, there's at least one person in my family crazier than me: her. She casually says to me in quick catch-up conversation: "I shot my ex-boyfriend in the leg." I just said: "Really?!?" And she shrugs and nonchalantly says: "Well, I mean, I wasn't aiming for the leg, but yeah, I shot my ex-boyfriend in the leg." I guess that's part of the reason why nobody had seen or talked to her for so long. She was just passing through town due to a recent family loss. My 4th cousin Kevin shot himself and killed himself a week ago, so she was heading back (I guess) to her town from the funeral up out of state. She seemed really distraught and hadn't slept the night before. Her and Kevin were really close when they were younger too, she kinda had the stance with him that I do with her. Sometimes, you don't really realize how much you miss someone until you see them in person again.

Congratulations?

First you’ll need to start living.

How do you know who your 4th cousin is?

It's covered in my spunk now.

I like Plastic Man. A woman was eating lunch on top of The Empire State Building and he stretched his neck all the way from the street below into her soda - THROUGH HER STRAW- and then popped his head out in front of hers full size and simply says, “Hi!”!

Yes I know you've read Plastic Man. It's like me telling someone to listen to King Crimson and they're like, "I like Metallica!"

King who?

Unfortunately dealt with some really bad anxiety for most of the day and I felt so bad because I was at the fair with my friends and I was being such an anxious downer. I did still have a good time but it was really hard to feel motivated to do anything. My friends were all trying to make it better and it's something I truly appreciated because I've never been upfront about my anxiety to a group of friends before. They all understood. Ended up at my place still hanging with them and we just chilled and played Rocket League until just now. Fun day. Unfortunate that my mental ****ery wouldn't let me enjoy a lot of it, but oh well. That's life.

Sounds like you got too damn stoned son