Honey cakes I will make your mouth burst into flames.

Bob and Jim, are sitting at their favorite bar, drinking beer. Bob turns to Jim and says, "You know, I'm tired of going through life without an education. Tomorrow I think I'll go to the Community College, and sign up for some classes." Jim thinks it's a good idea, and the two leave.

The next day, Bob goes down to the college and meets the Dean of Admissions, who signs him up for the four basic classes: Math, English, History, and Logic.

"Logic?" Bob asks, "What's that?"

The dean says, "I'll show you. Do you own a weedwhacker?"

"Yeah."

"Than logically speaking, because you own a weedwhacker, I think that you would have a yard."

"That's true, I do have a yard."

"I'm not done", the dean says. "Because you have a yard, I think logically that you would have a house."

"Yes, I do have a house."

"And because you have a house, I think that you might logically have a family."

"I have a family."

"I'm not done yet. Because you have a family, than logically you must have a wife."

"Yes, I do have a wife."

"And because you have a wife, than logic tells me you must be a heterosexual."

"I am a heterosexual. That's amazing, you were able to find out all of that because I have a weedwhacker."

Excited to take the class now, Bob shakes the Dean's hand and leaves to go meet Jim at the bar. He tells Jim about his classes, how he is signed up for Math, English, History, and Logic.

"Logic?" Jim asks, "What's that?"

Bob says, "I'll show you. Do you have a weedwhacker?"

"No."

*then

That ****up was funnier then the joke itself.

Copy/paste*

Nice try, Home Depot

Did they stick ya with the warped wood instead of a nice straight piece?

You know she likes em curved.

I was trying to imply that you were working for Big Lawn Care and your joke was an attempt to sell weedwhackers.