I thought you Americans used those motorised scooters?

I think your body is letting you know that you are getting old.

Walking around the mall is a good workout though. I see little old ladies speedwalking around my local mall.

No. And Batman would agree with me.

**** batman in his cock loving ***** holding **** dripping *** guzzling mother ****ing *******.

I'm more old school, I have people carry me around in a litter.

No, walking around malls has always done this to me, even when I was was a teenager. Museums have the same effect too. I think it has to do with the standing and looking at stuff part of the equation

At least you get to sit down at a strip club.

This is definitely a thing. They used to open our local mall early on Sundays to allow people to walk around before stores open. Dozens of elderly would always be there.

Huey Lewis and the News would be a footnote on the toilet paper roll of history if it weren't for American Psycho.