I mean you should stop drinking till you can whack off properly. Then you should get tanked.

I'm gonna see a therapist probably next week.

I can wack off fine, if anything I need to stop.

I can't see any therapist telling you to stop whacking off. Just stop whacking off to your parents.

Homeschoolers are the best drinkers.

upgrade to whiskey and call inna designated hitter...aka water between drinks. It'll curb any expectation of a hangover/dehydration you could expect. You also need less volume of liquor for the same effect.

Also, the more sugar in your drinks...the more crap for the body to metabolize. So choosing your mixers wisely can also keep your body running smoothly even tho you're poisoning your liver and brain. You'll learn to embrace the burn and it makes you sound like a sexy throat cancer survivor after a while!!! Nothing turns a lady on quicker than an accent like Froggie from the Little Rascals whispering "who's your daddy?" followed by a chest pound and then pulling your tighty whiteys up until you got a nice frenchman's speedo effect going and then asking her how she likes your new shoes.

reddit.com/r/nofap

hey one thing at a time

you gotta see a therapist?

You should totally troll them with experiences you plagiarize from films...

Tell her the nickname you earned in college is foot-long.

tell her that you're under a lotta stress 'cause your family's moving due to the land where you currently live being bought out for development...and then tell her you and your friends go out for one last adventure after finding a treasure map up in your attic. Don't forget the fratellis...and don't forget about feeding basement retards baby ruths!!!

The Fratellis are a fun band!

do these Fratellis have a babyruth-loving, giant basement retard???