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Old 09-05-2015, 09:59 PM   #34101 (permalink)
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True story. Me and Lin are watching TV one day and this little fly starts buzzing about. And then there's 3 of them. And then there's 10 of them. And then there's hundreds of them. It was like Amityville!

A fly must have nested and laid eggs and they all hatched at once. The next 30 minutes was like a Lucille Ball sketch. Me and Lin, towels in hand, swatting baby flies while climbing over furniture and falling all over ****.

Luckily we'd both done acid in our pasts so we were prepared for the insane/ridiculous battle that ensued.
Was there a reasonable explanation for this? (i.e. stuff that I could think of if I weren't drunk off my ass?)
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There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 09-05-2015, 10:29 PM   #34102 (permalink)
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Not really.
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“The fact that we live at the bottom of a deep gravity well,
on the surface of a gas covered planet going around a nuclear fireball 90 million miles away
and think this to be normal is obviously some indication of how skewed our perspective tends to be.”
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Old 09-05-2015, 11:16 PM   #34103 (permalink)
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Not really.
tHEN **** YOU THICK HOLY **** i'M HIGH.
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Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien
There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 09-05-2015, 11:18 PM   #34104 (permalink)
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tHEN **** YOU THICK HOLY **** i'M HIGH.
Lightweight.
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Old 09-06-2015, 12:26 AM   #34105 (permalink)
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Wait...y'all are seriously scared of a bat and flies?? W...t...f... What would y'all do if ya woke up and this f*cker was chilling near/on you/your bed/your stuff?
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Old 09-06-2015, 12:34 AM   #34106 (permalink)
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It's because you stay up all night fighting crime.
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Old 09-06-2015, 01:01 AM   #34107 (permalink)
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Wait...y'all are seriously scared of a bat and flies?? W...t...f... What would y'all do if ya woke up and this f*cker was chilling near/on you/your bed/your stuff?
I would not be living in ****ing Texas is what I'd be doing.
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Old 09-06-2015, 03:05 AM   #34108 (permalink)
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So I'm quitting my job and becoming a full time pot-dealer, I'm so excited I can finally write on my resume entrepreneur. I've got the dankest in my whole hood.
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saw LeBron James downtown but then I realized I'm just racist
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Old 09-06-2015, 05:40 AM   #34109 (permalink)
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So to put a cherry on top of my sh*tty vacation with my family that just occurred, my body decided Friday night to get food poisoning. I haven't eaten anything besides half a piece of toast since I ate that poison infested meatball sandwich Friday night. I was lethargic all day yesterday and fell asleep at 8 o'clock because I was up all night Saturday morning puking my brains out. The last batch of bile vomits literally left all my extremities numb. I literally couldn't move my fingers for five minutes. I've never puked that hard.

I'm better today but since I fell asleep so early last night I'm up at 6:30 in the morning deleting spam for you f*ckers. I'm the hero you deserve.
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Old 09-06-2015, 07:13 AM   #34110 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by Chula Vista View Post
True story. Me and Lin are watching TV one day and this little fly starts buzzing about. And then there's 3 of them. And then there's 10 of them. And then there's hundreds of them. It was like Amityville!
I had that once. Turned out a mouse had crawled under my fridge to die. Had any increasingly offensive odours lately?
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