There is a difference between you and the bat...Three letter word difference....J.O.B.

I'm covered in inexplicable bruises and cuts. Must have been a good Easter.

ftfy

Naps are the new hipster thing to do (my outlook on individuals younger than myself is that every one of you ****ers are a hipster. And by hipster, I mean **** you).

Great. Ossum.

Might as well start on the Geritol early too. Build up a tolerance and ****. I think they sell grey hair die for the more discerning douche bag as well.

Today... I moved too fast and **** my pants.

Do they make Just for Men that works backwards and gives you a touch of grey? That'd be a great ploy to not get carded.

You want the fast track to liver damage and cirrhosis then. Right this way sir.

What's the best method for getting people off my lawn? And if I don't have a lawn is it okay if I borrow someone else's to practice?

I believe that's a question best suited for the Ask Chula thread. Might want to knock first though, I think he's napping.

Hes not napping,he's drinking ensure....

That ****'s pretty tasty.