Happened to me last year. I'm contract too. Luckily, things picked up after about a month.

Hope you land something soon.

Dude, go eat some bacon. Bacon is one of the things that makes me question my atheism. Bacon is the alpha and the omega. If it tasted like bacon, I'd take a bite out of a live pig. I'd feel awful about it, but I would still do it.

I went grocery shopping today, and while I was being rung up, found myself in the awkward position of listening to the bagger asking the cashier out on a date and her completely shooting him down.

You should have said, "I think you're gonna need a price check on that burn."

I think the price would be high since it was the worst kind of burn: a pity burn. She was all like, "Aw, thanks. That's such a sweet thing to say!"

People rave about how good bacon is just like everyone says they're terrified of clowns.

I'll admit though, bacon is amazing.

If you were buying any tissues, you should have handed them to him and said, "You're gonna need these more than I am."

(once more seated between his coffee and his computer, slowly the goblin closes up his latest "today" and places it neatly into his past now as yet one more "today" in a line of so many "todays" stretching back to a point beyond his own memory even, where his mind, having a quick guess of how many memories he must now have by now memorized against some rough total of "todays" he has lived, feels cheated at how little he actually remembers of his long life, even if he tries to deflect the self-resentment with a quick retort like "...alright, but what does anyone owe their past anyway, and how can someone pay it back in kind now...", while outside, upon the cold wet street, as if to echo the goblin's pensive reflective mood inside himself, the morning's rain had just continued unbroken on through his "today" on up to this now late evening moment, until in the end, and upon giving up too, the goblin simply said "...well I guess we owe it to our past not to forget it, but how we do so easily forget our past where we don't strive to remember it..")

What the ****

Are you high?