She's back! The wife of the next door household is back. For some reason the guy who lives over the rd. once told me he wouldn't go in her house 'cause she could say he'd tried to rape her' or words to that effect . This made me extremelly wary of her...but even more wary of him.

My wife's family has been harassing my sister over the phone in an attempt to evoke a response from me. Our court date is coming up, they're just looking for another bullsh*t restraining order against me. Some people are just bad human beings.

Boring day. Played guitar, talked to a few friends, argued with my girl, and sitting on the comp being ignored =) Love women.

Just received a call from my (soon to be ex)wife apologizing for being a bitch to me earlier today. There must be some ulterior motive, as niceness is not her fort'e. Oh women. You can't live with 'em, and prostitution is illegal. What can you do.

I got 99 problems but a bitch aint one.

I also got nobody to suck my dick, so it's a pro and a con.

District manager made a surprise stop at work today. Which meant I couldn't slack off and instead had to clean the place. I'm running on one hour sleep because of studying for an exam. Probably get only a couple hours tonight too. I requested less work hours, it's too much to handle right now. I think I sharted at work too. I'm not sure yet, too scared and nervous to check.

Drank + dropped today.

That means I needed alone time to listen to music and ****, and that was granted to me. I ****ing love that my friends are so understanding.

traffic was a bitch today

took me 2 and a half hours to get back for what is usually a 45-minute journey

Went into a near full-on panic and chickened out of open mic tonight. It's not like everyone there was a great musician/poet/whatever or anything, and I wasn't intimidated by the other people so much as the fact that I had to stay sober.

Turns out, I still can't play guitar in front of more than 9 or 10 people (at a friend's house, family cookout, or something) without having a beer or two to steady the old nerves.

Also freaked because 4 members of my support system were unable to attend, and that made me uneasy.

I really wish I'd just strapped on some balls...:(

EDIT: I am writing a ballad about Kenny Loggins to cope. I was told it would help. I just feel creepy doing so, for fear that it will actually be good, I'll actually have to record it...

Don't let it be a big deal. You'll knock 'em dead next time :)

Maybe it would have helped if you turned your back to the audience and performed.

People would think you are being artsy and getting into a zone but it would really be to hide your nervousness and make you feel more comfortable.