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Paedantic Basterd 01-27-2011 10:41 AM

Well, my former companion was the same kind of guy (I actually couldn't finish some of your posts, the thinking was so alike), and when I found out that he was after our relationship ended, it destroyed every shred of a friendship because I was so hurt by it.

Out of curiosity, how do you feel about monogamy? Where does monogamy start and end for you?

s_k 01-27-2011 11:11 AM

I don't care about monogamy. You could have figured that.

But I can answer your question; Monogamy ends when you stop being honest towards eachother. I would never hide anything from anyone. There will be no 'finding out' with me. You'll just know when you're close to me. But that's probably more about honesty than about monogamy.

Paedantic Basterd 01-27-2011 11:17 AM

You are comfortable with your girlfriend openly having sex with other men. Just trying to simplify this as much as I can to understand.

Is that a cultural difference, or more a difference amongst you and your friends?

s_k 01-27-2011 11:21 AM

I do have some friends who understand, but it's mainly a thing I can live with.
Before we broke up we were actually in a point in our relationship where we figured that an open relationship would be good. We're both not the types to go **** everyone we know. So there could be another person, maybe. I don't think I'd mind. Always have to be careful with STD's of course, but when it comes to the emotional side of the story, I probably wouldn't mind. For me it doesn't mean she likes me any less.
I mentioned above, she had a girlfriend for a while. It was a pretty nice period. The stories were good and the girl she was with was a friend of mine too. It just worked :)

Paedantic Basterd 01-27-2011 11:22 AM

Huh.

Okay.

s_k 01-27-2011 11:23 AM

Hahaha, feel free to say anything you're thinking right now.

Guybrush 01-27-2011 11:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by s_k (Post 992445)
I do have some friends who understand, but it's mainly a thing I can live with.
Before we broke up we were actually in a point in our relationship where we figured that an open relationship would be good. We're both not the types to go **** everyone we know. So there could be another person, maybe. I don't think I'd mind. Always have to be careful with STD's of course, but when it comes to the emotional side of the story, I probably wouldn't mind. For me it doesn't mean she likes me any less.
I mentioned above, she had a girlfriend for a while. It was a pretty nice period. The stories were good and the girl she was with was a friend of mine too. It just worked :)

Your girlfriend having a girlfriend is really the best scenario in this situation. You can offer something she can't, like a penis and a male mindset, and so a girl replacing your role in the relationship 100% is very unlikely. However, how would you have felt if she'd had another boyfriend?

Paedantic Basterd 01-27-2011 11:25 AM

This is the part where I shrug.

If it works for all of you, then okay. I really have nothing more to say about it. The rest is all just me thinking about how I'd feel if it applied to my life.

s_k 01-27-2011 11:27 AM

@ Tore:
I'd be fine with that.
It sounds a bit gross, but I wouldn't have sex with her just after she went to his place and before she took a shower. I mean, I really don't like boys in that way.
But apart from that, relationship wise, I wouldn't mind.

I mean, everone has thought 'man I would like to bang that girl' (or man) in a relationship. But you can't, because you shouldn't. But why not? It's normal in some cultures.

I know I'm a bit strange in this. But I really wouldn't mind.
I must admit that the reactions on MB are a bit more 'what the...' than the reactions in the Netherlands. So it's still a bit a cultural thing. But it's not normal here to have two girlfriends either. Altough I have heard of some cases.

s_k 01-27-2011 11:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pedestrian (Post 992450)
This is the part where I shrug.

If it works for all of you, then okay. I really have nothing more to say about it. The rest is all just me thinking about how I'd feel if it applied to my life.

Yeah. I understand it all sounds a bit off for you.
But I'm really not some ****ed up guy who lives his life doing crazy stuff all the time. I just think differently on this matter. I didn't use to be like that. It just grew somehow.


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