Got hooked up with a job in my Dad's bar today. Sure, it's only one night a week, and I'll practically be working for peanuts, but it'll be nice to have a good reason to get out the house over what's probably gonna be a painfully long summer.

Lucky doosh.

I'll be 16 tomorrow.
I'm fucking suicidal right now. I feel kinda disenchanted about everything and I want to sit around on my ass.

Today I am really homesick :( I didn't think this was going to happen but it apparently has. I am also lamenting over the fact that I get paid less over here than I would in Australia. But I guess the fact that it's cheaper to live balances it out.

If it's any consolation, I still sometimes feel homesick for Australia even though I've been here for a decade! I find myself looking at the suburb where I used to live on google maps. It's like I know that if I went back there to live it would be completely different to how I remember it and people I knew from there would live there no longer, but I still relish the memories. Last time I went back to Aus was in Form 6 and as I got off the plane and felt the heat waves envelop me, I knew I was home.

I know it's not the same kind of away from home sans-family homesickness you're dealing with, but it does make me wonder what it'd be like if I were to move to England in a year or two (I'm considering it).

Wow that was a soppy post on my part.

I was supposed to work all day but thanks to my stupid ass client that has a tight deadline but is being unresponsive, I couldn't proceed! Jackass. But I guess it wasn't all bad because I got to chill out all day. Then I hopped on the bus to downtown just in time for a Belgian waffle before the place closed! I got a mocha too and it was quite tasty. I needed to return a pair of jeans, but before that I thought I'd go walk around a bit. I ended up at a spot I'd never chilled at before, Harbor Steps. I sat at the top of the waterfall, in the center, looking out over the steps and at people. It was sunny, I was happy that I decided to put on a hat on my way out. With sunglasses I'd still have had to squint. It was chill...listened to some fresh glitch-hop flavors and contemplated things. It was relaxing to just sit there, I ought to make it a point to do that every weekend. Just chill somewhere, somewhere new each time perhaps. I'd always see new people, but then I wouldn't ever be "that guy that chills out there" because I'd always be in a different spot. How are honeys supposed to ever recognize me and say "hey it's that guy" or "oh he's there all the time, hope he's there today I'm gonna go talk to him" or something. These are the things sometimes I think about that I shouldn't think about because it's nonsense and I should just do what I'm gonna do. Oh here I go again. I ordered some Thai for dinner! Choice. Right across the street so phone call + 15 minutes --> in ma belly. Ah time to go watch some Mad Men and go to bed. Good bye.

Maybe I should write in the dear diary thread?

Yeah I know, it's funny! And I know at the end of the year when I move back to Aus I'm going to be missing NZ like hell and looking up places I stayed on google maps... can't win!

Wow England... that's crazy. I don't think I could ever live somewhere that far removed from my home. I think Australia and New Zealand are the only places in the world I can happily reside in! Which are luckily the two places I have citizenship in, too :) Someone told me there are a lot of skills shortages in England though, especially in teaching and public services (although NZ has a teacher shortage too!). What would you be planning to do in England?

And nahh, not a soppy post. I'm glad I'm not the only one who gets homesick!

all day i have been playing piano and singing some stuped melody stuck in my head LOL

Haha moving to England is a bit of a crazy idea at this stage (even the Brits will probably think I'm barmy for it) and I am most likely being blinded by anglophilia. But at the same time, I think I need a change of setting and I want to travel so England sounds like the perfect base of operations from which to roam Europe.

I came up with the idea on a whim when someone in my class asked what I was going to do in the 6 months between finishing my last exam and graduating. Some of my friends are thinking of traveling which is fine for the bunch who live at home and haven't been spiralling into debt for the past few years but I'm going to have to save a bit first.

Unless I decide to do postgrad, I'd be working fulltime in England. I'm not sure how strict the NZ/Britain immigration policies are but I know they have a points system which ranks based on tertiary study, age, experience, work contracts, financial security etc.

But it's still very early days yet and I think I'll stick around here for a year or two. I just don't want to get locked into the grind too quickly.

^ It sounds like a great idea to me! A great excuse to get the travel bug out of the way... you should totally do it. I've heard it's quite easy for New Zealanders and Australians to live and work in the UK, a lot easier than getting a Visa in the US or elsewhere. I've actually considered going over there to live/ work when I graduate as my dad is Italian so I've got a European passport and can live and work anywhere in the European Union indefinitely as a citizen! I really want to take advantage of it, but I think I've decided that I'd get too homesick!

Anywhere in the EU! Lucky! I wish I had an Italian dad haha. Now it's my turn to tell you that you should totally do it. :D