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Old 08-05-2015, 05:56 AM   #1 (permalink)
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I do not want to experience childhood again vicariously through my children. Not only would it not be reinvigorating it would be positively depressing.
Because you didn't like your childhood or because you think that childhood is generally not a good time?
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Old 08-05-2015, 08:00 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Because you didn't like your childhood or because you think that childhood is generally not a good time?
I didn't like mine. Add to that I don't think a kid with half my DNA being raised by me would be any better off. I'm more ****ed than my dad was but at least I don't take it out on others.
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Old 08-05-2015, 08:07 AM   #3 (permalink)
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I didn't like mine. Add to that I don't think a kid with half my DNA being raised by me would be any better off. I'm more ****ed than my dad was but at least I don't take it out on others.
Well, the world would most likely be a better place if more people seriously asked themselves whether they really want kids and/or are able to raise them.
The whole pressure from society that you have to have kids and otherwise can't have a happy and fulfilling life sadly makes this way more difficult than it should be.
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Old 08-05-2015, 08:10 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Old 08-05-2015, 09:21 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Well, the world would most likely be a better place if more people seriously asked themselves whether they really want kids and/or are able to raise them.
The whole pressure from society that you have to have kids and otherwise can't have a happy and fulfilling life sadly makes this way more difficult than it should be.
Thanks. I've been called selfish for not wanting kids. I've always been proud of myself for not having any unwanted kids. I think it's selfish to have a kid when you're going to care for it properly. I did get a woman pregnant when I was 29 but she didn't even tell me until after the abortion. I was really thankful she took care of it. And I still am.

I used to be friends with a guy who hooked up with a lot of women from Plenty of Fish and those websites and they were usually between 25-35. Without fail they were all single moms. He would have sex with around two new ones every month and had a lot in rotation. Crazy sex culture if you ask me. I took some chances, too, in my day, and I was often scared. More about herpes and warts than HIV but I couldn't live with the stress of that kind of promiscuity. Not even with condoms.
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Old 08-05-2015, 09:49 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Thanks. I've been called selfish for not wanting kids. I've always been proud of myself for not having any unwanted kids. I think it's selfish to have a kid when you're going to care for it properly. I did get a woman pregnant when I was 29 but she didn't even tell me until after the abortion. I was really thankful she took care of it. And I still am.

I used to be friends with a guy who hooked up with a lot of women from Plenty of Fish and those websites and they were usually between 25-35. Without fail they were all single moms. He would have sex with around two new ones every month and had a lot in rotation. Crazy sex culture if you ask me. I took some chances, too, in my day, and I was often scared. More about herpes and warts than HIV but I couldn't live with the stress of that kind of promiscuity. Not even with condoms.
Well at the end of the day wanting kids and being able to support kids boils down to two questions/circumstances. 1) Are you financially able and mature enough to handle having kids? 2) More importantly, are you taking precautions to prevent children if you do not want them?

Accidents do happen - I should know mine was because a condom broke - but just having unprotected sex increases your risk of kids significantly. In my case, I had no idea about the situation until I get a letter from her while I'm overseas indicating she was pregnant, even then, I didn't know the kid was mine. I found out officially when Social Services showed up at my door with him.

There's also a lot of stupid acts out there, too. I'm a cop in the Army, and in my day-to-day interactions on post on such, I do encounter Soldiers who have had an oops and even teenagers who have. I mean if you're just running around sleeping with anybody who opens their legs, you're bound to end up with a kid or something else you don't want.

Don't get me wrong though, having a kid is great. It has it's moments of frustration and such, but ultimately the good outweighs the bad.
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Old 08-05-2015, 11:10 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Thanks. I've been called selfish for not wanting kids. I've always been proud of myself for not having any unwanted kids. I think it's selfish to have a kid when you're going to care for it properly. I did get a woman pregnant when I was 29 but she didn't even tell me until after the abortion. I was really thankful she took care of it. And I still am.

I used to be friends with a guy who hooked up with a lot of women from Plenty of Fish and those websites and they were usually between 25-35. Without fail they were all single moms. He would have sex with around two new ones every month and had a lot in rotation. Crazy sex culture if you ask me. I took some chances, too, in my day, and I was often scared. More about herpes and warts than HIV but I couldn't live with the stress of that kind of promiscuity. Not even with condoms.
The selfishness argument always strikes me as incredibly idiotic.
As if people who have kids have them for unselfish reasons.
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