Subterfuge

opulent

the expression "Cool beans"

floccinaucinihilipilification.

"The act of estimating something as worthless."

Also, pogonophobia - the fear of beards.

backstory

Huckster. My grandfather always referred to telemarketers this way and it made me laugh.

I use Cattywampus sometimes, although I don't think it's a recognized word.

Also, I've been waiting for the right time to use Blundering Dolt on some poor fool.

Ahhhmmmm......There are plenty of times you could use that here.

Carpetbomber should be brought back as an insult again.

hobgoblin.

Dag. As in, "you're a dag".

Cumquat. I've never had one, but I hear they're delicious.