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Old 05-21-2014, 08:23 PM   #101 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by Carpe Mortem View Post
"I got a six inch chicken teriyaki sub in the poison drawer for you tonight"



poison drawer, nice. My boyfriend calls Bed Bath & Beyond pillows and shit, it cracks me up every time.


"Steph, how many times do I have to tell you not to play kitchen beautician?"
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Old 05-21-2014, 08:34 PM   #102 (permalink)
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"I wish u didn't look so much like chris hemsworth and weren't so funny and charismatic as well as very terrific at dirty talk because u make it very difficult for me to not leave my hubby tom brady for u"
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Old 05-21-2014, 08:34 PM   #103 (permalink)
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"Rad did they record well"
My response "well well".
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Old 05-22-2014, 11:52 AM   #104 (permalink)
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"I wish u didn't look so much like chris hemsworth and weren't so funny and charismatic as well as very terrific at dirty talk because u make it very difficult for me to not leave my hubby tom brady for u"
I told you that was confidential!
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Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien
There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 05-22-2014, 12:09 PM   #105 (permalink)
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BST FreeMsg: Your next mo charge of $55.00 is due on 05/23/2014.
Crap.
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Old 05-22-2014, 02:46 PM   #106 (permalink)
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"Get your ass to Mars!"
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Old 05-22-2014, 07:19 PM   #107 (permalink)
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Who needs a metronome when you have a heartbeat?
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Old 05-22-2014, 07:54 PM   #108 (permalink)
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"Get your ass to Mars!"
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Old 05-24-2014, 01:51 PM   #109 (permalink)
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"I may be wasted but I'm not stupid. "
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Old 05-24-2014, 02:53 PM   #110 (permalink)
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"If you love me you'll make me a nutella cheesecake"
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