Why two i's?

:rofl:

Cos you see better with two, obviously.

Music Banter Remembers....

I see fine with just the one anus.

Yeah well you certainly do enough talking out of it. :laughing:

Dogs as long as they are Shih Tzus

raccoons

A spectre appears to you in a long, black robe. They have no features understandable by your puny mortal mind, but a voice dim as a moonless sky slithers from its hood and into your mind. It asks you a simple choice, and warns that there is no third option.

You must choose between a cat with a human face, and a dog with human hands. Each beast is unkillable and if threatened with violence, will return in kind. If somehow deposed or escaped from, they will always reappear the next day. Each being can use its human features to their full capacity. Whichever monster you choose will now be your lifelong companion, and will not leave your side until the day that you die a thankful death, in which case it will move onto its next victim.

Choose wisely.

An unconditionally loving dog that can give me a handjob?

Who says the dog is unconditionally loving?