.

Her double fisting fetish? No, no, no. My double fisting fetish. She just a happy compliant.

Ahhh, so that's why she's your ex.

Tfw the old sales dude in the office turns changing an ink cartridge into an all morning affair. It's like watching a slow deliberate car wreck.

Did you bring popcorn?

I am ill-prepared.

I wouldn't care or even have noticed it, but the printer in question is right next to my office, so it's a fun distraction.

I knew it would come down to him asking me for help. Turns out the cartridge was bad.

How's that for anticlimactic.

"Accidentally" spill it, ponder how exactly you'll clean it up (this will take up most of your time), and make someone else clean it up.