xLizardx

After a chance remark by my Stepdad about singing in a band not being a “real” job – the implication being that I am a lazy, useless, layabout, with no focus, purpose, or direction in life, whose unrealistic ambitions stand about as much chance of being fulfilled as any complex organism does of surviving a nuclear apocalypse -


Except for cockroaches and Simon Cowell. Or weird cockroach-Cowell hybrids. Cowellroaches? Cockwells? ...Yes. “Cockwells” it is.

I got to thinking of all the things I have actually accomplished this year, specifically, towards furthering my musical aspirations.

Now, being a Brit, such self-congratulatory reflection seems a little too close to aggrandising narcisissim for comfort,


The basis of most British humour is self-deprecating sarcasm.

...but bear with me: sometimes, when people unfairly put you down, it is actually a good idea to remind yourself of why their insults are approximately as accurate as North Korean news reports.


Pictured: the most incisive media depiction of North Korea since 1953.

After all, confidence is an important and valuable quality, right? Especially for a performer. Occasionally recollecting why you rock is probably advisable, therefore [unless of course you start doing it all the time, and sincerely and consistently agreeing with compliments]. There is a thin line between confidence and arrogance, and that line is Tony Stark.


Pictured: the only person who can can honestly reply: “...A genius, billionaire, playboy philanthropist”.

Everyone loves Tony Stark, because a. he's Iron Man, b. he's played by Robert Downey Jr., and c. see a. and b.. However, since you, I, and everyone else on this planet fails to fulfil those criteria, then if you suspect that you're beginning to sound like Mr. Stark, it may be a good time to actually pay attention to some of your less flattering youtube comments.


Except for ones like these. People who casually go around advocating suicide as an insult are even lower forms of life than cockwells. And oh look, this particular douche has even managed to include aggressive racism simultaneously!

Arrogance is a slippery slope that commences with self-certainty, and ends with this:


Hey, I never claimed that the initial confidence needed to be justified :/

Aaaaaanyway, now that I've put any remaining readers off their food/ tea/ crack cocaine, lets wrap up this tangental trek of desultory digression, and alliteratively arrive at the actual purported point of this post.

I thought that it would be amusing to write a retrospective of proactive things I've done in the past 12 months, and, if anyone else is interested, for you to do so, too.
The list needn't focus on musically related achievements, as mine predominantly will, but it should be positive, preferably. So many people at the start of a new year spend time anxiously looking forward, concocting unattainable resolutions that almost invariably end in failure, so perhaps it would be nice to remind yourself of all the cool things you've already done – who knows, maybe you'll even manifest greater motivation for cool things to come

Things that I have done this year:

• Written at least half a dozen songs
• Recorded covers/ arrangements of numerous others
• Travelled to attend two different auditions
• Joined two different bands
• Finally began earning regular income from performing music
• Recorded and released a “proper” music video
• Uploaded multiple home-made music videos
• Learned how to program my own percussion as opposed to merely replying on loops
• Secured a promotional agreement with a small radio-station in return for composing a theme song for the presenter
• Learned to edit videos using Final Cut
• Storyboarded several forthcoming music video projects, for adaptation in the new year
• Approximately doubled the following on my music FB page, and gained new Youtube subscribers
• Gained valuable experience in setting up/ dismantling gear
• Performed at least a dozen gigs
• Met many cool new people and some awesome musicians
• Improved upon my time-management and organisational skills
• Lost weight in a healthy, and rational manner, whilst retaining separation between body image and self-esteem
• Be happy.

A note on the last two points: I have previously had an eating disorder, so I have to be careful when undertaking any healthy-eating/ fitness regime not to allow it to develop into encroaching obsession – so viewing my body image as a completely separate question from my sense of self-worth is extremely important. Thankfully, I'm managing it, probably because I'm now equipped with the knowledge that I can feel perfectly happy, fulfilled, and attractive, even if technically overweight. I've included the point on this list because physical fitness, stamina, and strength are all extremely useful qualities when gigging [I like to dance whilst I'm singing, and speakers are heavy], and also because it is an unfortunate fact that people who more closely conform to physical ideals tend to make for better marketing, especially [and unfairly] so if you happen to be female.

Happiness is included because I believe that it is both a product of, and a significant factor in, creativity.


Anyway, that's my list. Hope this was OK to post in this section, if not, then please feel free to direct me elsewhere!

And if you've read this far, and haven't fallen asleep or run away screaming, then why not write your own list? Go on, I dare you.

- Eliza

P.S. Yes, I do read too much Cracked.com, however did you guess?

Jukeboxfin

S'all good.

xLizardx

Thankyou I'm a little disappointed that nobody seems very interested in contributing their own lists however... oh well.

RoxyRollah

umm you want a list of things we have all done this year?

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Cheese

This year is only 16 hours old so all I've done is gone to a car show

xLizardx

Ah... last year now! I wrote this post yesterday, or was it the day before?

But by all means, provide a list of things that you have done in 2014 too.
I have:

• sung Auld Lang Syne and just about remembered what the bloody lyrics are
• dismantled/ folded stands and speakers etc.
• got paid
• got a taxi
• eaten a yoghurt
• made a cup of tea
• pissed about on the internet.

RoxyRollah

Honestly, I am not trying to sound like a biotch, at all but the title of the thread is "Things That I have Done This Year", that would imply by the heading that you are the only person, that is posting, then there was the wall of script that went along with it. So I am not sure anyone noticed that you invited a response to go along with it.. I am just throwing that out there... That is what deterred my response to it...

That and when I opened it I had just smoked my breakfast and I was a little confused, by the picture of Simon Cowell and cockroachs...

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xLizardx

16 hours?! Ah yes, sure enough, you're in New Zealand

Well, clearly you've been slacking off: 16 hours of this year have passed already, and you've not even slain a single orc yet?

RoxyRollah

It's still 2013 stateside... and honestly, there isn't anything anyone on this board would be interested in knowing... sheeyot honey...

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xLizardx

Fair enough. I included the pictures because I thought it would be funny, however I appreciate I probably underestimated how much they would dominate the text in this format. I'll alter the title to be more inclusive if it is possible to do so?