Is this site more important than the ones you love?

slappyjenkins · 05-19-2013, 08:17 PM

Hi everyone,

**Goofle** · 05-19-2013, 08:22 PM

Less important than my mum, dad and sister. But more important than anyone else. Family wise at least.

Paedantic Basterd · 05-19-2013, 08:23 PM

Is brushing your teeth more important, if you do that first? Checking your email? Turning on the TV?

No. These are things we do out of habit. They're inconsequential, reflexive, irrelevant things. The day my grandma died, I turned on the television for a week and disappeared in it. Doesn't mean I loved my mother any less.

She sounds like the sort of girl who would read your text messages.

**Goofle** · 05-19-2013, 08:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pedestrian

Is brushing your teeth more important, if you do that first? Checking your email? Turning on the TV?

No. These are things we do out of habit. They're inconsequential, reflexive, irrelevant things. The day my grandma died, I turned on the television for a week and disappeared in it. Doesn't mean I loved my mother any less.

She sounds like the sort of girl who would read your text messages.

I don't mean to offend, but I can't quite tell what side of the fence you are on based on that.

Personally, many members of my family mean very little to me. This community may be essentially just a group of randoms, but I feel more of a connection to the general membership than those of my family.

Paedantic Basterd · 05-19-2013, 08:34 PM

I don't have a very strong sense of family either, but I don't necessarily have a comparably strong sense of community on a website.

I'm on the side of the fence that she shouldn't get worked up, because she's interpreting the situation in a way that's absurd, regardless of whether or not he does feel a strong bond with others on the internet or not.

I've been in both situations, having addictive bonds and having little attachment, and it wasn't the case in either place that it meant I didn't care for my family or significant other.

**Goofle** · 05-19-2013, 08:39 PM

Ahh, that makes more sense. I generally agree as well.

Burning Down · 05-19-2013, 08:41 PM

No, people that I love in real life are more important to me than this site. However I've developed friendships with people on this site and other forums, and although they're long distance, they are still significant.

There were 3 deaths in the family over the last 5 years and I didn't shed a tear at their funerals. Nothing affected me and I just went about my daily business like nothing happened. My mom thought that was inappropriate but I didn't care. Still don't.

Paedantic Basterd · 05-19-2013, 08:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by slappyjenkins

I'm going to tell her that. It's absurd that your dad died 2 years ago this day and you wanted to hear from me before 6pm.

Wow, I love this place! You guys are the best!

It was TWO YEARS AGO? I missed that part and thought it was a massive overreaction.

Stephen · 05-19-2013, 08:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by slappyjenkins

And, yikes, instead of talking to her I went ahead and posted on this site too. And now she knows that!

She did tell me I should go ahead and spend my time on the websites if that was what I wanted more than her!

As one who knows how these BS games go the 'correct' response was "I am so sorry I am not worthy please forgive my insensitivity..."

Quote:

Originally Posted by slappyjenkins

Good one pedestrian! I agree with you! Who cares that her dad died 2 years ago this day and I didn't even contact her in any way until 6pm.

Hahaha, I got someone on my side!!!!

She can console herself just fine.

and if she is reading this thread you are only digging yourself in deeper.

...but yeah, she is overreacting.

Paedantic Basterd · 05-19-2013, 08:50 PM

I hope she is reading the thread, as she can hear how possessive, controlling, and emotional she is being.

05-19-2013, 08:17 PM	#1 (permalink)
slappyjenkins Music Addict Join Date: Nov 2012 Posts: 214	Is this site more important than the ones you love? Hi everyone, __________________ I was once told...True intimacy is finding out what the other person wants and needs and if it's within your power giving it to them. Last edited by slappyjenkins; 08-02-2013 at 03:11 AM.

05-19-2013, 08:23 PM	#3 (permalink)
Paedantic Basterd Music Addict Join Date: Sep 2010 Posts: 5,184	Is brushing your teeth more important, if you do that first? Checking your email? Turning on the TV? No. These are things we do out of habit. They're inconsequential, reflexive, irrelevant things. The day my grandma died, I turned on the television for a week and disappeared in it. Doesn't mean I loved my mother any less. She sounds like the sort of girl who would read your text messages.

05-19-2013, 08:34 PM	#5 (permalink)
Paedantic Basterd Music Addict Join Date: Sep 2010 Posts: 5,184	I don't have a very strong sense of family either, but I don't necessarily have a comparably strong sense of community on a website. I'm on the side of the fence that she shouldn't get worked up, because she's interpreting the situation in a way that's absurd, regardless of whether or not he does feel a strong bond with others on the internet or not. I've been in both situations, having addictive bonds and having little attachment, and it wasn't the case in either place that it meant I didn't care for my family or significant other.

05-19-2013, 08:41 PM	#7 (permalink)
Burning Down The Music Guru. Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Beyond the Wall Posts: 4,858	No, people that I love in real life are more important to me than this site. However I've developed friendships with people on this site and other forums, and although they're long distance, they are still significant. There were 3 deaths in the family over the last 5 years and I didn't shed a tear at their funerals. Nothing affected me and I just went about my daily business like nothing happened. My mom thought that was inappropriate but I didn't care. Still don't.

05-19-2013, 08:50 PM	#10 (permalink)
Paedantic Basterd Music Addict Join Date: Sep 2010 Posts: 5,184	I hope she is reading the thread, as she can hear how possessive, controlling, and emotional she is being.